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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Family holiday drama

828 replies

familydrama1 · 21/08/2024 21:36

So we are due to go on holiday next year with family. We invited my parents, they booked their own room - they then invited my nephew (who is 17). My brother didn't pay for my nephew or even offer to pay for their place.

I found out I was pregnant recently and can't book the baby's space until they are born. Also there will be no spaces as, the baby is due 4 months before the holiday. Anyone we trust with our child will be on that holiday. We need to take my nephew off the booking and change it to the baby when they are born.

AIBU to take my nephew off the booking (I have spoken to my parents about this and they understand) but I know my brother won't be happy and it will cause drama. Or should just not go and lose thousands 😣

Need an outside perspective pleaseeee

OP posts:
Thread gallery
5
6pence · 21/08/2024 21:56

So your parents will have to have the baby in their room?

AskZoltar · 21/08/2024 21:56

No you can't remove your nephew from the booking. You sound awful.

DillyDilly · 21/08/2024 21:56

It sounds like it will be a miserable holiday anyway, so many people sharing a room - your parents, your 17 yo nephew and your daughter in one room.

And your room already to capacity.

dobblevit · 21/08/2024 21:56

heldinadream · 21/08/2024 21:49

Did you not immediately take out travel insurance after you booked?

Would that cover having a baby??

Hayley1256 · 21/08/2024 21:56

familydrama1 · 21/08/2024 21:54

Our room is at full capacity, this is the only way we can add the baby trust me it's the last resort

A baby won't count towards the room capacity and even if it did, your nephew isn't in your room. So are you wanting the baby to sleep in your parents room instead of your nephew? I'm so confused. Have you actually spoken to the company?

jamsandwiched · 21/08/2024 21:57

familydrama1 · 21/08/2024 21:54

Our room is at full capacity, this is the only way we can add the baby trust me it's the last resort

So were you expecting your parents to share with your dd and the baby instead of your dd and nephew?

Pippa12 · 21/08/2024 21:57

It would be beyond cruel to bump your nephew off a holiday I’m sure he’s looking forward to.

why would you lose £1000’s?? Have you paid the balance so far in advance??

I cannot understand where this baby is sleeping that your nephew can’t come with his grandparents?

If I was your brother I’d be furious.

NerrSnerr · 21/08/2024 21:57

If your parents booked and paid for themselves and your nephew why do you think they needed to ask you? Surely he can go on whatever holiday he likes if it's paid for?

Original poster
familydrama1 · 21/08/2024 21:58

I have spoken to the cruise line they said we CANNOT add the baby. If we booked another room. We would need another adult - which we don't have.

I do not want to take my nephew off. I booked it for my parents, why would I want to be spiteful.

My room has my other 2 children and husband in there. All other rooms are full. This is the only way. It's not out of spite. We will lose thousands of pounds

OP posts:
bruffin · 21/08/2024 21:58

Will the baby even be allowed, looks like minimum age is 6 months for shorter cruise and 12 months for older. You originally said baby will be 4 months then changed to 6 months. If baby is late will how old will they be?

dafa · 21/08/2024 21:58

Unless you’re going in the middle of summer holidays, even then, I can’t see a cruise being at capacity for next year. We are looking to book for next summer and loads of spaces and 3/4+ cabins available.

Call the cruise lines, ask about options. They may be able to move your cruise for free.

Whaleandsnail6 · 21/08/2024 21:58

Taking your nephew off the booking seems cruel...sounds like you never wanted him to come anyway and have jumped at the chance to get rid of him from the holiday.

Your parents have paid for him so whats it to you that he or his dad hasnt paid?!

Can you Explain simply how taking him off the booking affects your own room that you weren't sharing with nephew?

LibertyPrime · 21/08/2024 21:58

familydrama1 · 21/08/2024 21:58

I have spoken to the cruise line they said we CANNOT add the baby. If we booked another room. We would need another adult - which we don't have.

I do not want to take my nephew off. I booked it for my parents, why would I want to be spiteful.

My room has my other 2 children and husband in there. All other rooms are full. This is the only way. It's not out of spite. We will lose thousands of pounds

so rebook but switch nephew to that room or your dd ?

Sunshineclouds11 · 21/08/2024 21:59

Your posts are so confusing.

jamsandwiched · 21/08/2024 21:59

If your parents and daughter and nephew are in one room then why is your room with just you and dh at full capacity?

BrieHugger · 21/08/2024 21:59

OP you need to explain yourself better.

Why is your daughter not staying with you?
Why can’t your nephew go?
Why would the baby take up his space?

Nazzywish · 21/08/2024 21:59

Drip...
Drip..Drip...

DillyDilly · 21/08/2024 21:59

familydrama1 · 21/08/2024 21:58

I have spoken to the cruise line they said we CANNOT add the baby. If we booked another room. We would need another adult - which we don't have.

I do not want to take my nephew off. I booked it for my parents, why would I want to be spiteful.

My room has my other 2 children and husband in there. All other rooms are full. This is the only way. It's not out of spite. We will lose thousands of pounds

Surely you can change things on the booking - list the 17 yo as sharing with you and then book another room with your DH as being the occupant, along with your baby.

Invisimamma · 21/08/2024 21:59

You can buy a spot now, we've done it before my son was born, you just put 'infant' on the booking and confirm the name nearer the time. You might need to call them but it is possible.

Babies usually need to be 6months to cruise (at least, some companies don't take babies at all) so how can you only have 4 months until the holiday when baby is born?

dafa · 21/08/2024 22:00

familydrama1 · 21/08/2024 21:58

I have spoken to the cruise line they said we CANNOT add the baby. If we booked another room. We would need another adult - which we don't have.

I do not want to take my nephew off. I booked it for my parents, why would I want to be spiteful.

My room has my other 2 children and husband in there. All other rooms are full. This is the only way. It's not out of spite. We will lose thousands of pounds

Can one of your children go with your in laws? And you have the baby with you?

dobblevit · 21/08/2024 22:00

Can you and the baby not go then you only lose your booking. I know you'll lose money but you won't really as you would have paid it anyway. You'll be losing a cruise. But you'll have a small baby and probably won't be sleeping well as it is

m00rfarm · 21/08/2024 22:00

familydrama1 · 21/08/2024 21:58

I have spoken to the cruise line they said we CANNOT add the baby. If we booked another room. We would need another adult - which we don't have.

I do not want to take my nephew off. I booked it for my parents, why would I want to be spiteful.

My room has my other 2 children and husband in there. All other rooms are full. This is the only way. It's not out of spite. We will lose thousands of pounds

Of course you can book another room - you say it is for you or your husband. Or one of the other adult couples. When the time comes, no one cares who sleeps in which room. And it may be nice to have an extra room if the baby is not sleeping well, either you or your husband can get some rest overnight. I really cannot see the issue.

Madamecholetsbonnet · 21/08/2024 22:00

So book another room for yourself and add the baby to that booking once it’s born.

Then some combination of adults to children will cover the rooms and nobody gets to cancel anybody else’s holiday.

6pence · 21/08/2024 22:00

Ah so you’ll put one of your extra two children in with your parents and your baby will go in with you.

You’ve only just mentioned your other two children.

Staunchlystarling · 21/08/2024 22:01

Why can’t you add the baby to your parents room but put them in with you? The issue seems to be you’re a family of 5 and only booked one room, so now you want to take your nephews? Add the baby to another room.