I don't care what issues your kid has you still need to parent them

[Differentstarts]

I'm fuming just had a massive argument with my now ex friend because she won't parent her kid. I don't care if your kid is ND, NT or identifies as a tablecloth you still need to parent them. I was at my friends this afternoon with my kids 7 and 4 and her kids 9 and 5. Our eldest kids where sat together nicely watching a film and youngest 2 where playing. Her 5 year old suddenly decides she wants to watch telly and picks the remote control up and changes the channel. My friends response was to the eldest 2 just let her otherwise she will kick off you can watch the rest later. Her eldest just accepted this he's clearly use to it. However I'm not accepting that so I took the remote and put the film back on so with that screaming and tears
Her eldest was agreeing with his mum and saying it's OK I don't mind Which was also annoying me. Then my friend started having a go at me how iv upset her daughter and how the kids didn't even mind watching it later. I struggle with anger issues so at this point I'm losing my shit at her (I know I shouldn't have) and I got my kids and left. I'm still fuming. I know I should of just left straight away but come on what is wrong with people

Yabu. If the eldest 2 where happy to watch it later you should of gone along with it
Yanbu she needs to discipline her daughter

So you went wild and caused a scene in Your street. Classy

Have you ever had social services involvement because of your anger issues op?

I don't think your friend will be regretting the loss of your friendship. I definitely don't think her children will be either - either of them! You aren't someone I'd want my kids around.

Regardless of your motivations, your behaviour must have been disturbing, upsetting, and really quite frightening.

Absolutely no shouting involved I don't need to shout/scream/swear by wild I mean I let all my thoughts/emotions run freely

I have left the friendship now I can't be around someone who treats their kids like that

Unlike you I have self control you can rip somebody to pieces privately and at a decent volume infact it's far more satisfying

You shouldn't of stayed in the friendship longer than 2 incidents when she messaged you asking why you've ghosted her you should of said
I absolutely couid not tolerate the pampered princess situation you have going on it was irritating the life out of me...

It’s a shame your parents didn’t “parent” you…

I didn't have parents to parent me

God, your poor kids.

That's becoming very apparent 😞

She's raising her into a monster. The fact that she smirks at him means she knows what she's doing and how to do it. The poor boy won't waste anytime leaving them to it once he's of age and hopefully, she's still able to see him even for a minute after he's gone.

He's learned to put up and shut up (and likely counting his days to freedom).

I just worry for his future as he's been brought up to put up and shut up so if when he's older he ends up in a relationship with a controlling abusive partner he's not going to have any skills to protect himself

On the off-chance this is not a troll post, you sound like a worse parent than her. Yes her approach maybe isn’t ideal but I guarantee you she’ll have a better relationship with her kids than you when you they grow up.

The way you behave will be incredibly scary, unpredictable and humiliating for your children. By your own admission you have serious mental health issues yet you are unwilling to acknowledge the immense impact these will have on your children and make any attempt to mitigate.

The story you have told here is just one of many your children will be telling in therapy in years to come.

Worry about your own children ending up in controlling and abusive relationships. That’s the behaviour you’re modelling for them.

I remember walking home from a park with a former friend and her 9 year old who kept moaning to be picked up and she literally carried this healthy spoilt child for 30 minutes ( usually a 15 minutes walk ) I often wonder how that child behaves nower days lol I wasn't able to tolerate it!

My kids no how to stand up for themselves and not take shit of others

It's so hard to be around it. Kids having tantrums doesn't bother me. Kick scream cry for an hour if you want I'm not given you attention for it. But parents who just give in at every little whim really piss me off especially when it impacts others

This isn't really an AIBU then.

It's more a OIRI. Obviously I'm Right Innit?

She should not let her child set rules for everyone else. Every child needs firm boundaries and taking turns is part of this.

Watching TV is a privilege which should be taken away for bad behaviour.

Does your friend want to end up with an adult-sized child who screams until they get what they want?

Iv been on mumsnet years I'm not a troll. Do you honestly think her son will want anything to do with her when he grows up and her daughter will likely end up either an incapable unemployed single adult whos still living at home in her 30s or in prison as in the real world people won't give her everything she wants

An adult-sized child like the OP you mean?

Can only imagine you have not read all the OP’s posts as I can’t imagine how anyone could think she is being reasonable. Even if you think the friend was being unreasonable, which is a separate thing.

Because I am right

It's not a separate thing it's the reason for my reaction

It was a great shame beuse the mother was great company! But the child wouid persistently cut into conversations moooooom mooooooom, was a really picky eater to everybody was expected to eat where a 9 year old wanted to, just a real vacuum of joy! Me personally I will absolutely ignore moronic behaviour no response at all, no looking in your direction no response at all intill the behaviour is correct and I'll tell you what my kids got it and have zero tantrums because it's a waste of energy!