Husband threw cat after scratch

[Friarclose]

Tonight while trying to hold her still for a flea treatment, our cat severely scratched DH, drawing blood. DHs immediate kneejerk reaction was to throw the cat to the floor, hard. She missed the corner of a wooden table by about 4 inches.

DH is fuming that my only reaction was to scream at him for throwing her and not caring that he was bleeding. I know he was hurt but to throw her like that???

AIBU? was it just a reaction to being hurt or would other people put the cat down carefully regardless of being hurt? I'm really upset 😡

The automatic reaction to a cat scratch is to contract your muscles and pull your hand or arm away, not to take hold of the animal with the limb that has just been scratched and forcibly sling it. It's retaliation, not removing the source of his pain.

Well, I can only say, animals nowadays are sometimes treated with more consideration
than my generation as kids.
🙄

Aw poor old girl. Is she OK? Cats are hardy creatures, she's probably bit disgruntled but she will be fine.

My cats clawed me and my reflex is to move my hand away.

She claws me every time I try to get her in the carrier. She uses me as an emergency escape route trying to leg it. I've dropped her whilst trying to wrestle her in it.

I'd go ballistic if my partner threw her.

Not sure what to say to make the situation better for you to be honest.

But I think you're right to be mad.

Thank God he's not a vet!
Slight over reaction, the cat was getting more attention than him

To be honest, for me the deciding factor is that you said he was severely scratched. What does that mean? I’m assuming it was quite deep, bloody, painful, may restrict his use of that area, could potentially get infected etc. as in a serious injury.

I think it would be a different thing if it wasn’t a serious injury

Ultimately in that moment he wanted to get the cat away from him, so tbh I’m in two minds about whether it was uncalled for if he did throw the cat. It was likely an instinctive response regardless, he wanted to get the cat away from him to defend himself. If he dropped it close to him, the cat would still be next to him and able to scratch him. So it likely ties into self defence although I can totally understand why it seems brutal.

I would throw the cat away. I'd be terrified. Your husband has been severly scratched and you don't seem to give a s**t.

Cat behaviour would be to run like fuck away from the person doing the spot on treatment, not come back to have a second go at something so much bigger and probably yelling.

I've had deep scratches from cats, I've been bitten deeply by one particularly ungrateful one I was saving from suffocation at the time (I'm joking, she was suffocating, so hardly in a position to reason that I was actually helping) and at a similar intensity level of pain, I had DD1 sink her teeth so deep into me when feeding her that I thought I'd need my nipple sewed back on. At no point did I feel the slightest urge to throw any of them.

@BoundaryGirl3939 "I would throw the cat away. I'd be terrified."

Seriously? Terrified? Of your own cat?

Not directly related to your question about your DH, but definitely good advice on here about giving the dreaded treatment with the cat wrapped in a towel, and on the floor so that there is no distance to fall. Easier said than done though! I hope both your DH and your cat recover from the ordeal! 😾

DH is fuming that my only reaction was to scream at him for throwing her and not caring that he was bleeding. I know he was hurt but to throw her like that???

The fact that he, a grown adult, is sulking because you didn’t immediately make him the first priority is f**king pathetic. His response should have been “aaaaarrgghh!!!!!! All the expletives! Oh shit, is the cat ok?! Omg, I feel awful I just threw her like that “

Ouch! I have never been scratched by a cat luckily so no idea what severe scratches would feel like. Everyone responds differently to pain so ultimately what you’re happy to endure, someone else may not have the same pain tolerance to.

I have been scratched by my parent’s dog before, but my parents used to trim his nails so it wasn’t painful and didn’t break my skin.

I have permanent scars from rescuing a hurt, feral cat (with animal handling gloves), yes they bloody hurt. No, I didn't throw the cat.

No excuse at all. Grown man vs 4kg cat. He'd be gone.

In future, for you, wrap kitty in a towel or blanket, all murder mittens contained. Secure her between your knees. Flea treatment takes two seconds to apply. Make sure it's open and ready to use first.

I babysat a cat for a week and I was afraid of it when it would claw or bite me ( i know it was being playful but i was very uneasy). I have a fear of cat scratches after seeing some videos of cats attacking humans for no reason. Those deep scratches can cause infection, scarring and trauma. I think my reaction would be to get it away from me so throwing away it in a panic to protect myself would be an instinctive kneejerk reaction.

Our female cat threw a glass bowl off the table ( she had form) then slipped off the oilcloth cover.
My instinct was to lurch across the table and grab her round her middle , I managed to get both hands just under her armpits.
I saved her from falling on broken glass and in her gratitude she left me a scar that I bear to this day on my wrist.
Love her really.

I would probably have dropped the cat and sworn a bit. But throwing her hard on the ground? No way. I have four cats and I know the scratches can hurt, but that's just nasty. And she's an older cat too. What if he'd injured her? You're right to be angry OP.

If he was holding her and dropped her fine, even if a little strong. Actually throwing her - a different action - is not on.

My cat loves bare feet hanging off the sofa - when she attacks she gets a nudge with the foot - it's not a kick! My ankles are always covered in scabs!

Hand me the smelling salts - I've had an attack of the 'vapours' due to the natural reactions of a cat and a human (male).

If OP still wore corsets then her, and other PPs, might well have good reason for their fainting/faintheartedness.

Who actually needs their DP to 'hold' their cat to flea treat it? So many cat people manage it perfectly well on their own, often with multiple cats.

I disagree. Dropping the cat would be an instinctive reaction to pain. That is quite different to throwing her down hard.

This sounds like an extremely aggressive and inappropriate reaction. I'd be worried I (not to mention fuming) at him.

The DH is now saying he is sorry, he must have now accepted he has something to be sorry about.

Maybe he was just fed up of the shouting, followed by the silent treatment from his wife?

I agree. Horrible thing to do and shows his true colours.
He’d be out the door.

If my DP did that I think I'd lash out at him, not that he would. We've both been severely scratched to the point of drawing blood, including on the face, cos have taken in a lot of fosters that I have rehabilitated and had to handle aggressive cats in cat rescue. I don't think there's any excuse for it. It's not instinctive at all, and I've had some bad slices.

I dunno. Is it ok to kick a small dog that’s biting you or your child? Because to be honest I would…

Lovely…