To suggest a male curfew one night a week

[twojumps]

when women can walk free in the streets without fear?

Yes, violence still happens in homes and behind closed doors but what a powerful message it would send.

I'd say every night but let's start with one.

Literalism is a recent disease of the English, we caught it from across the pond😂

I don't think you're getting the point so we'll leave it there.

Yes Yes Yes I know about violence at home thank you very much, already adressed that.
I disagree, if a curfew for women after Everard is called for, and a virtual curfew for women enacted during the Yorkshire ripper, then yes dammit I too call for a curfew on men.
Sick of the reasonable doormat approach, that you never hear from men.

I'm sorry if I missed your suggestions regarding DV. I'm skimming through this thread. So perhaps I'm being unfair as I haven't seen all your posts, but the one I'm quoting comes across as appallingly dismissive of DV. As if those women (who make up a large proportion of VAWG victims) don't matter as much as victims of stranger violence.

Again I apologise if I'm missing something you've said previously but it implies a sort of victim blaming attitude towards victims of DV. I don't see how being concerned for all victims of VAWG (and actually male victims too) is a "doormat approach"?

The high profile cases you mention made the news precisely because they're less common than domestic homicide. It's worth remembering that 3 women a week are killed by someone they know, usually a partner or ex partner - and usually when it's domestic homicide it happens in the home.

A curfew like the one suggested by OP is not only unhelpful, unfair on innocent men, and divisive (so would cause resentment) but it would also increase the risk of violence for DV victims.

Knee jerk gimmicks aren't what we need. We need helpful, effective and holistic actions. I've posted about what would help in my previous posts.

Your absolutely right I don't understand sexist people at all

@nocoolnamesleft
Currently all women face restrictions for the actions of some men

All women?? All?

What restrictions are you even talking about??

I'd like to know this to as I'm certainly not restricted

No one has been able to address the fact a curfew would only lead to an increase in disgruntled men wanting to blame women for their issues. Nor the fact that it would trap victims with their abusers.

Once again, "all women" aren't restricted. Some chose to restrict themselves because they feel threatened. But plenty of women don't.

And this wouldn't stop women being hurt or abused. Women would still attack women. And then lesbians and bisexual women would become the target for the perpetually anxious as they would need a different group to blame for their anxieties and unease when out and about.

Also, it's well known that as under-charged Male on female sexual abuse is, it's even worse when it comes to female on male abuse. Because men don't feel able to report or aren't taken seriously when they do report. So statistics are somewhat skewed anyway.

Self imposed restricts where men aren't even allowed to walk down the same street as a woman without being treated as a threat.

I agree that something needs to be done OP and increasing violence is a worry. Your suggestion of a curfew isn't the answer - it would be unhelpful and divisive, cause resentment, and increase the risk especially with DV. However I'm guessing you posted the thread because you're scared, which I understand especially if you perhaps live in an area with high crime, and although it's not the answer the issues and solutions do need to be tackled.

I don't think everyone thinks about the far reaching consequences, indirect as well as direct, of failing or insufficient public services and poverty. Society breaks down, crime including violence goes up, communities are less cohesive and less safe.

There's been false economy approach for too long. Violence needs to be tackled holistically and not on the cheap (it saves money longer term for anyone thinking it's unaffordable, because crime costs society heavily including financially).

With DV, there's lots of threads on MN highlighting some of the needs. More social housing, more refuge spaces, for example.

With VAWG (and violent crime in general) public services are often threadbare, poorly funded and with poorly trained or overwhelmed staff, just papering over cracks instead of providing timely and effective help. This includes social services, mental health services and the NHS in general, substance issue services, probation services, CJS and police, punitive benefits system, youth and mentoring services, and a lack of job, education and training opportunities.

Wow you seem utterly determined to maintain the status quo no matter what, or to sidestep all the successful efforts that have been done to curtail it.
Nothing stops change as much as people like you.

Your posts are no different in tone than those that vehmently deny that diet and lifestyle changes will make them less obese.

Those who want everyone to sink with them, or
are justfying themselves...

You can't restrict people's generally freedom of movement on the basis of their sex. Jeez.

During COVID, both Panama and Peru instituted a policy where men could only go outside every other day, with women allowed to go out on the alternating days. This had nothing to do with male violence against women and girls, just an easy fair way to split the population in half and make it so that in many/most households, an adult would be able to go out each day in case the household needed something.

It proved to be a very popular policy among women, many of whom said that they hadn't realized how safe they would feel in such circumstances and how pleasant it was to go about their business with a significant element of the threat and hassle they experienced daily simply removed. The situation had become so normalized and accepted that it was just a fact of life, until their governments accidentally showed them that another way IS possible.

Many people here are sure that the idea of restraints outside the house on men who would kill women should be dismissed and maybe ridiculed because.... I guess in the UK, most femicides occur inside the house AND are carried out by someone the victim knows? This is just ridiculously odd to me. A man who will kill a woman will do it where and when he can, so yeah of course if he's an intimate he might do it inside the house - but that same man may attack the same woman outside of the house. From the WOMAN's perspective - the VICTIM's perspective - that just increases her odds of being targeted.

The chances of being attacked outside are still materially greater - you have to evade the same guy that attacks you inside thinking he covers his tracks better outside, plus all the other guys who may attack you. I don't understand how there is a bigger risk INSIDE THAN OUTSIDE* in the UK versus every other country in the world. It just seems like a way to shut down people talking about VAWG by dividing the instances of VAWG up in a weird and unsubstantiated way.

FWIW, I was in Mexico City protesting VAWG, and systematic and normalized WAWG by men, in the spring of 2021 just after the killing of Sarah Everard. I met a load of British feminists who said they finally understood how women in Mexico and other places in Latin America feel being targeted all the time, inside and outside "the home". I'm really sorry to see people here being absolutely fucking awful about this; that is not the UK I know from living there (I left in 2016) or from what the British women I met told me.

*Edited potion is in ALL CAPS.

Rape, murder and violence in general are all against the law. Do you really think some rule, which for a million reasons is ridiculous, would stop somebody who intended on attacking a woman? Why would they respect that law suddenly over all the others? In fact it would be the perfect time to go out looking for women wondering the streets, where there's no men around who might be capable of kicking their heads in to worry about.

Fucking stupidest idea I've ever heard.

Great comment!
Proves it can be done xx thank you

Personally I'd like to see a curfew for men EVERY night of the week, but I realise I'll be in the very tiniest minority there.

I'm sorry, is this a joke? A curfew? Just for being male?

Well, that's probably the biggest load of misandrist bollocks I have ever heard.

This place gets more bonkers by the day . . . 🙄

Ahh but it's mumsnet....known for silly little posts like this, laughing stick of the internet!

This thread is being mocked elsewhere' already

*stock....

I'd imagine this thread is also being used in parts of the Internet to demonstrate why "women are the devil and we need to gain more control over them again"

Just live with what!? You do know that the vast majority of men are not rapists and murderers?

Honestly OP, you sound hysterical. Do yourself a favour, turn off the TV, put down the newspaper and FGS stay off social media and you might start to feel better.

Why can't you walk at night without fear?

If I was walking alone at night, I'd want there to be men around...

What imbalance? Men are statistically more likely to be attacked on a night out than women.

This thread is WILD!!