Wedding guest dress

[Shiningstarr]

Family wedding next year.. seen this dress online that I love....

Would I be unreasonable to think this is ok for a wedding guest? Or is it too bridesmaidy?

ohelloclothing.com/products/phoebe-midaxi-dress-hot-pink

The dress is stunning! And in my world you can’t be over dressed for a wedding, it’s literally the place to get really dressed up. In my experience, no bride in real life worries about being outdone, that’s a MN thing. In reality, on my wedding day I was wearing a white dress, tiara and stunning shoes, had my hair and make up done and had more than enough attention, I was happy for my guests to look lovely! Wear the dress OP.

It’s fine. I’d have been happy for you to wear that at my wedding.but I specifically told my female guests that I wanted them to wear something they’d really love and that ideally I’d have put a black tie dress code on the invitations so feel free to go along those lines.

So if the bride hadn’t already indicated then I’d ask her if she had an atheistic in mind. Not everyone wants their guests in safe boring pastel knee length dresses with a hat on.

(yes I am aware that the pink dress is not black tie)

I just think there's an etiquette to wedding attire and this falls outside of it.

Which obviously makes me a miserable, sack-wearing, pearl-clutching old bag so don't listen to me and wear it if you like it :)

I’m always curious what “being mistaken for a bridesmaid” would look like in practice. Surely it’s abundantly clear by the point you’re not walking behind the bride down there aisle. Or you just say “oh no, I’m not in the wedding party, I think the bridesmaids are all on that table over there.” It’s not as if you’re going to be wordlessly hauled out of your pew, and co-opted into holding the bride’s bouquet and veil whilst thinking “FML, should have worn the grey trouser suit instead.”

I will say my mother did remark "lots of these dresses look a bit bridesmaid-y. It must be the fashion now" at a recent wedding. They were all fairly normal dresses 🤣

And I don't get the whole thing about "avoiding the bridesmaid dress colours". I've had one wedding where the bride specified "the bridesmaids are in royal blue so we ask you to avoid that". Otherwise I've had no idea until the wedding what they were even wearing!

Wear the dress! It’s lovely and I’d love to be able to wear it.

I’ve never understood why it’s not ok to like attention or to ‘dress to impress’ at a wedding. They’re ALL about getting glammed up and wearing your finery in my circles.

From Debrett's:

Dress smartly and avoid showing too much flesh

Different circles then... Only OP knows her own circles. In mine a guest wearing that would be laughed at.

Unless the bride and groom are aristocracy, I think OP will be fine 🤣

Gosh, not massively well mannered to laugh at people.

The sooner men learn how to feel humiliation and embarrassment, the better.

OP if you like the dress and it fits and it's comfortable go for it. It's a pretty dress.

It's lovely, you're allowed to look nice, or even hot at someone's wedding. So long as it's not the bridesmaid colour you won't look bridesmaidy

Your circle sounds grim. Imagine thinking it's OK to laugh at a women's choice of dress. How does that make them better?

But nobody in my circles would even conceive that this is appropriate or pleasant, really, we just don't wear those sort of clothes. We are not old or uptight, or even unusual going by the other comments here.

What an awful circle to mix in. Had anyone laughed at my guests’ outfits - or anything else - at my wedding, they’d have been turfed off the island, and not in the boats we arrived in.

Thank goodness my friends arent like that! I'd be so depressed if my friends were all so bitchy and prim

I will join you in the old bag corner. Of course you should dress up and look nice as a wedding guest. I just think a dress held together by string isn't really appropriate attire

But I can't see it looking bridesmaidy at all, I have never seen a bridesmaid dress looking remotely like this

The front is fine but I agree with PPs that the naked back detail seems a bit much for a wedding guest. It's not bridesmaidy, but it does feel a little OTT to me.

That said, you will know the bride and groom and the general vibe of their wedding much better than anyone here! I'm constantly seeing people on Mumsnet insisting that wedding outfits are 'inappropriate' when they would actually be totally acceptable at any wedding I've attended. So if it's going to be the kind of wedding where everyone goes all-out and you won't look out of place, then it's fine.

@KreedKafer

It clearly does vary a lot between circles.

I feel the opposite - I have never seen anyone wear a dress like this to a wedding and if they did they would stick out like a sore thumb.

Someone posted a while back with a dress that was slashed open to their navel and loads of people thought it was fine too

I find the 'appropriate for a wedding' comments on MN really funny. In the real world, it's 2024 not 1944- just don't wear a wedding dress and you'll be fine.

It's a beautiful dress OP (and recommended as a wedding guest dress in the listing), am thinking of ordering it myself so thank you!

Your circle actively laughs at people and their choice of clothes.

Do you honestly think it makes any of you better people?!

Ps the dress is found under 'wedding guest dresses' so that style is obviously trending 👗

Budge up in the old bag corner.

I love the front of the dress, it’s the back I’m not sure about from a practical perspective.

It’s not a style I’d wear but that’s irrelevant because I’m not the OP or one of her circle of friends. I think most of us only know what’s ‘wedding appropriate’ for our social circle. There’s also a gap between what the 16-25 age group consider ok as a wedding guest dress and what the over 25s think is ok, driven by places like Pretty Little Thing.

It's a pretty dress in a gorgeous colour (I always wear bold colours to occasions incliding weddings). However the back lets down and makes it look a bit cheap, which is a shame.

Given you can't wear a bra with it, I don't think the front construction will give much boob support and at events that involve a lot of dancing and drinking, boob support is always a consideration.