Should a sahm do dh ironing?

[crocly]

I have 2 small children and one due in October and I hate ironing.
I haven't ironed dh shirts in about a year since I told him I was not going to do it.
The ironing pile has grown over the past year and dh is complaining he has no clothes and he keeps asking for them to be ironed and nothings been ironed in a year.
It's all his T-shirts I don't iron my clothes and I don't iron the children's unless it's a particular item that needs it.
I am a sahm at the moment but I really don't like ironing and nor does he am I right to refuse as he wears it, he irons it or is this just part of my role as a sahm?

Lots of SAHM of young kids are chronically sleep deprived so jobs take longer or feel more overwhelming or they're just too exhausted.

Why do you think that only SAHM’s are chronically sleep deprived?

She didn't say they were the only ones sleep deprived did she?

Did I say that only SAHM are chronically sleep deprived?

Nope.

You made it seem like it only applied to SAHM’s. Otherwise it seems irrelevant to bring it up since parents of young children in general are often sleep deprived.

Why would that be any different to parents of young kids with full time jobs? Especially if they don't sleep well? And have to do household stuff as well

Women on here claim their big important husbands are doing these hugely responsible jobs as some kind of favour to them.

No. They are doing it to further their own ambitions. They would still do it whether they were with you or not. You don’t have to grovel in front of your husband to thank him for taking on the unimaginable pain of being a CEO or a partner in the firm or whatever.

If you feel like you need to constantly show gratitude to your husband for letting you stay at home, it’s time to go back to work.

No I didn't make it seem like that.

It's not irrelevant to bring it up seeing as we're literally discussing SAHM and why some of them struggle to get jobs done at home. 🙉

Lots of new parents are sleep deprived but often there is still a big gap and the mother is surviving on far less sleep than the father is.

Then he can iron his own shirt in the evening then! Pop the telly on and it’ll be done in no time.

I didn't say it was different.
But chronic sleep deprivation is a reason why some SAHM struggle to get the jobs done. I was answering a question.
It doesn't matter if other people might have it harder by having to go out to work on top of that either, it's still a reason.

Exactly. I’m glad I’m not the only one who read it that way.

I do similar, I work three and because I'm home I will do housework. But that's not my job on those days. My job is to take care of my child, which means I'm not paying someone to do it.

If, alongside my actual job, whether it's a work day or a childcare day, I get some housework done, bonus. And I will try because then it means weekends are family time. But if I don't, it doesn't matter because that's not solely my responsibility. Housework is the responsibility of everyone in the household able to do it.

Lol your funny efficient household doesn't mean serf

It is those fantasy kids who are way more difficult to organise than Nato. Basically fictitious nonsense they use to bolster the argument of not being a team player in a relationship.

2 hour nap to do everything that is too dangerous or out of way for child and God forbid eat or have five minutes break. Tablet mums strike again.

If you work you presumably share the sleep deprivation whereas (on here at least) SAHM are supposed to do all the night waking.

Actually, I would absolutely go earn all the money while DH was at home.

I do three days at the moment and I know I'd go insane at home full time. We only have me part time and DH full time because of the way our jobs work, it made more sense. I can also WFH which he can't, so it suits for drop off etc.

But while he currently earns more as I took a year out on mat leave and he was promoted in that year, even PT I'm catching him up. Give me a few more years and I'll overtake him. I love working, I love earning my own money and the independence it gives me and I love the example it sets for my daughter that she can have both the career and the family if she wants (and chooses her partner well).

Being a SAHM might be the best life for you but it's not for everyone.

So....try again.

Some of us still had to go in to work!

I’d rather stick needles in my eyes than degrade myself to the point where I relied on someone else to pay the bills but that’s just me.

I hear so many unhappy women on here complaining because they are miserable that can’t afford to leave because they gave up their lives to look after the kids.

Women on here are complaining because it’s not the 1950s and they shouldn’t have to iron their husbands shirts. Too right it’s not the 1950s. Women should be self sufficient and unreliant on their husbands income

No one should iron - waste of time.

If he particularly wants his doing, then he should do it.

I don't iron anything and wouldn't start now just because DH wanted his doing

They play. They certainly don’t need occupying every single second of the day.

Nothing wrong with a bit of tablet time, be it so mum can eat or have a break or clean.

I think it depends. I know some mums go back to work but are still getting up in the night to breastfeed.

The minute I reached 12 years old, my mum stopped ironing for me. I resented it at the time, but I soon got good at it. Just hated doing it.

When I was single. and as soon as I could afford it, I paid someone to do my ironing. Worth every penny but - as I soon realised - pointless.

Very, very few clothes need ironing if they're tumble-dried. None at all if you don't buy any.

In this house, anyone needs anything ironed, they iron it themselves. Which means no one irons anything. In fact, faced with a special occasion a couple of years ago, my fifteen-year-old daughter asked, "Do we own an ironing board?"

I consider this absolutely top-level, gold-standard parenting.

@ebonyraven have you ever been a sham or is it the grass being greener