Disgusting or Not?

[BargingOnBy]

My partner has the habit of washing his hands and his arms up to the elbows at the kitchen sink and then drying them with the hand towel in the kitchen. He has very hairy arms.

AIBU to think this is disgusting and the hand towel in the kitchen should only be used for drying hands, not other hairy body parts?

I don’t feel that it is hygienic to handle food after I have washed my hands and dried them on the same hand towel that he has used.

I wash my hands and forearms at the kitchen sink, usually after handling the snake food and/or snake, and dry my hands and forearms on the kitchen hand towel. I can't say it's ever crossed my mind that extending my washing to my forearms necessitates a different towel! They're clean after washing.

Or maybe since he's your psychiatrist he should know that you're struggling to cope, otherwise what's the point? It sounds like you do need more support/treatment then you're getting currently. Struggling in a messed up house isn't a good way to live at all. I hope you can tell him what's going on and get the extra support you need.

I’m genuinely amazed that you are revolted by this to the point you’ve written a thread and are amazed that we all think you’re mental.

The there is no reason to be worried at all especially if your dogs are sits on your sofa.

Your house stinks, you've not changed your top in 5 days, but you're upset with your husband for wiping his clean arms on a towel.

Blimey.

I'm thinking brown, yellowy-green, purple...... Then what ?

personally, I wipe my arse using my hands, not my forearms

White for hands, brown for feet, green for torso, thighs and seat and in the cupboard beneath the stair, you'll find the red for pubic hair - courtesy of 'League of Gentlemen'

It is all 100% true, I’m sorry to say

Oh dear. 😀

I dont think this goes far enough, I'd burn the whole house. Who knows what else he's been touching with his hands. (or worse!)

He is using a towel to absorb clean water from a clean body. What's disgusting about that?

If you called him disgusting or dirty or went batshit in any way then you should definitely apologise, you're not the boss of all things and if this bothers you to that extent you should have separate colour-coded towels rather then make him change his perfectly reasonable behaviour to compensate for your batshittery.

It is definitely you that has the problem here I'm afraid and if my DH told me I was disgusting while wearing a five day old top and standing in a dirty house that stinks I would not take it well.

Would it be ok if he shaved his arms?

Not really. It’s more about washing body parts other than hands in the kitchen and drying them on the hand towel.

"It is definitely you that has the problem here I'm afraid and if my DH told me I was disgusting while wearing a five day old top and standing in a dirty house that stinks I would not take it well."

Exactly! You should think about that OP.

I am

May be he does that when he cooks? Is he a chef????

Aw I feel like you’re getting a lot of flack here given that it sounds like you’re really struggling with your mental health

Yeah, the towel thing is a bit nuts but it’s easy to blow little things out of proportion when everything feels awful and you’ve accepted that you were in the wrong much more graciously than most posters on here

And I’ve definitely wore the same clothes for a week and totally neglected the house work before when I’ve been in the trenches mh wise.

That being said your dh should have helped with the dishes well before they got to this point. Has he generally been supportive while you’ve been struggling with your mental health?

I always use the (ready for washing anyway) hand towel to dry my hair, then it goes into the wash. Feels a bit wasteful to take a clean hand towel, wash my hair with it, then it's so wet it wants to be washed anyway.

I see his point if it's going back onto the holder, wet from hair, for hands though. But if your hair quickly gets dry enough for a towel to still be usable, then good for you and I'm jealous!

almost everyone has hair on their arms, and it’s good to wash them before cooking especially if you’re going in deep !

Surely it depends where his forearms have been. If he’s a farm vet or farmer examining sheep and cows then maybe its a no from me.

I think maybe you need to tell your psychiatrist that you are in fact struggling to cope.

I’m with you OP and amazed that most people think it’s okay.

nothing to do with hairy arms either - I’m forever telling my family that drying cloths in the kitchen are for dishes not hands! They should use a hand towel for hands or kitchen roll.

if anyone uses my drying cloth for hands it goes straight to the laundry basket!