Partner telling me to eat healthily- fuming

[dreamer24]

I went for a run today. It's 23 degrees where I am, it's hot and it's not the best weather for running. I managed 3.2 miles but then had to stop as I'd ran out of water and what little water I had left in my bottle was warm given the heat.

I texted my partner when I'd finished (he was at a soft play with our toddler) to say I'd struggled but managed 3 miles, and that I felt a little dizzy and was craving water and salt (presumably because I'd sweated so much I'd lost a lot of salt). I said I might drive past McDonalds on the way home to grab some chips (just chips, nothing else) as I needed to replace the salt. He replied, "you need to eat healthily".

So... I saw red. This is a man who is overweight and who I watched sit on the sofa at lunch time and eat a Greggs cream cake. I didn't do this - I had a half a sandwich and a banana then went for a run. This is, by the way, my 3rd run of this week and I also plan to go to the gym tomorrow morning to do a weights class.

For context, I am a size 10 (BMI is 22.5 ish). So I am not even overweight but I want to tone up a bit and to get back my pre baby level of fitness, hence making this effort

Am I right to feel really annoyed by what feels like judgement for what I've chosen to eat post run, when I'm making an effort here and he is not? If he was the picture of health and fitness then maybe I'd accept that comment a bit more but ... seriously?! You eat a cake for lunch then tell me, post 3 mile run, to "eat healthily" 😵‍💫

Or am I overreacting or am I right to feel annoyed at this judgement? 🤔

@SaltAndVinegar2
I do eat healthily most of the time, he knows this. Last night for instance I cooked us a chicken and vegetable meal from scratch. Like a portion of chips from McDonald's is surely not going to mean I wake up obese when my BMI is 22 😂

@Chakademusandpliers
I expected him to say "ok" or "cool see you at home" or whatever. Like when he text me to say "we're at the soft play now", just before I started my run, I replied "ok, have fun". Like that would have been fine. Obviously it's the implied criticism and judgement I'm objecting to, it was unnecessary.

You are being a bit defensive about this OP! Chill out.

@BananaSpanner it's not remotely funny to me?

When I’ve been on a diet, I’ve actually asked my DH to pull me up if I am about to eat junk. Could he be trying to help you?

If not, he is just a cheeky sod. Two him to get stuffed (with his cream
cake of course) if it’s the latter.

You would have been better off going for no run then going for a run and needing chips after. Never heard of the need to replace salt like that. Get home drink water and have a banana you don't need the chips

As for what your partner said he probably doesn't understand the logic either

I haven't asked him to do this. If I had it would make more sense of course.

@dreamer24

but hopefully you'll take on board that marries are not helping. You need electrolytes not cheap table sat in greasy fries.

eat them if you want to, but don't convince yourself your body needs them.

He ate a cream cake, Did he really stuff it in his face? Just because he's overweight, doesn't mean he can't see running then shovelling fries into your face isn't a smart move.

I promise you, you do not need to replace the salt from a 3 mile run in 23 degree heat. I don't even take water on a run of that length.

Having said that, running, keeps you fit and is completely irrelevant to diet. 3 miles probably uses around 250 - 300 calories which is negligible.

Mansplaining doesn’t mean what you think it does.

I'd tell him you ended up having 2 big mac meals, chicken nuggets and then a massive cream cake and you're feeling loads better

YABU. If you're getting fries on the way back from a run (which I have also done, but I got a burger too) you should go to Burger King as theirs are a lot better than McDonald's 😊

You don't take water?! In 23⁰ heat if I walk one mile I'd be dying, just because you're a camel doesn't mean others don't need salt and water.

How patronising 😂

@AgathaSultana I was tempted!! 🤣

Sorry I definitely needed water running in 23 degrees - I think it's madness to suggest otherwise. Do people genuinely not sweat running in that heat for 3 miles? 😳

I felt a little dizzy and was craving water and salt (presumably because I'd sweated so much I'd lost a lot of salt). I said I might drive past McDonalds on the way home to grab some chips

If you were feeling dizzy was it safe for you to drive?

The question is not why he said it but why you are finding it so offensive. Is it because you are harbouring some guilt over your choices and, therefore he is right? Because if you were so sure that your choice is right, then, I imagine, the comment wouldn’t have bothered you. Unless there is whole history of him making comments about what you eat which you say there isn’t.
As others have said, people would find it odd to hear someone went on a run and followed it up with McD. I tell my partner all the time that he needs to look at his diet if he is seriously thinking about improving his health. Whereas he thinks that going to the gym twice a day gives him a cart blanche.

She’s right though.

He gave you a suggestion, not an explanation

@RumbleHoney
I sat on the grass by my car for a bit before I drove. I also don't think I was adequately fuelled tbh, that usually causes dizziness. Along with the heat of course.

Not the point, but I would run in the morning when it's cooler myself, even a short 3 mile run. No need for chips.

I wouldn't take water for a 3 mile run, no. I'd hydrate before hand and then have a glass of water when I got back. All running is great, obviously, but 3 miles isn't a huge distance.

I wouldn't take water on anything up to and including 10K, but nor would I be running outdoors when it's 23 degrees.

I'm currently taking water with me every time I go anywhere because it's bloody mafting even staggering a few hundred yards to the tube

@Catza
I'm finding it so offensive because I've ran 3 times this week which he knows, for me, has take a lot. I don't usually do that. I'm making a real effort and he knows that. I also texted to say I'd struggled on the run and found it hard. There was no empathy for that - just a criticism of what I planned to eat. It would have been nicer to have a bit more of a supportive reply I suppose? Like, well done, at least you got out and tried, or whatever. Instead it felt like criticism on top of me already making what feels like a huge effort this week.

It sounds like you resent him in general, not just for this comment.