Feels like there's way too many Men on MN

[Moonshine5]

I probably am being unreasonable however I'm on here primarily for female perspectives.

I think that's an unfair comment. I've seen many, many threads started by men where they're asking for opinions and advice from women. In fact I'd say most of the posts I've seen started by men are like this.

For the avoidance of the sorts of assumptions that underlie your first post, it wasn't irritation I felt. It was concern.

At least 90%. Then there are the ones that pretend to be women, a few have been caught out for that but no doubt they return. Just pervs wanting to overshare and to get others to share stories, often by lying. Unfortunately they trawl the relationships board too and comment on any post that vaguely mentions sex.

How many of them actually female perspectives, vs how many want to be validated? Most of those male posters vanish after the first couple of pages don't go their way don't they?

I think that's an unfair comment. I've seen many, many threads started by men where they're asking for opinions and advice from women. In fact I'd say most of the posts I've seen started by men are like this.

Lol. They always start off as if they're all reasonable and me nice, but the mask soon slips.

My husband manages to “talk bollocks”, as he puts it, to other men in the pub for hours at a time without any difficulty.

I have been with him when he does it and can confirm that that is exactly what they do.

I don't think anyone wants no men!

But there is definitely an influx of men posting about how their wives don't want to shag them anymore even though they take the bins out and he knows to not him that is the problem because the new girl at work, Ellie, she likes his jokes.

Yes, I do think you are being unreasonable. All should be welcome. And an internet forum like this one is not designed to be or appropriate to be exclusive.

I don't see a lot of women keeping their heads down on MN tbh. More a massive pile on when a man announces his presence.

This is such a stupid thread as the only affect I can see it having is to encourage more men to post. Women don't like being told by men what to do but the only group of people more likely than women to do the contrary of what they are told by the opposite sex, are good old men.

On that basis I conclude the OP is a man encouraging more men to post on MN

I think that's an unfair comment. I've seen many, many threads started by men where they're asking for opinions and advice from women. In fact I'd say most of the posts I've seen started by men are like this.

How is it unfair? I'd just like to see one where a man wants opinions and advice from women as I haven't seen one.

Can you link one?

Why do men announce their presence at all? It's because they think their maleness makes their opinion more valid.

The sex topic is full of men which makes it unusable for most of the women on MN.

🤣🤣🤣 I have read 2 this week that are almost exactly that.

Yes, like the breast feeding group I went to. Many women were getting support there. Then it was opened to all and many men got support there too. Brilliant it was for them.

If I wasn't about to go to work I could link to many. Nearly every post I see from man is him asking fir advice.

I have no problem at all with men being on here. What I DO object to is when women are sharing their lived experiences of sexism or misogyny and how to deal with it/ support each other and they come on to lecture us about how thats not how it is or try to minimise women's lived experiences or try to gaslight us into thinking it hasn't happened or that "not all men" BS.

One stupid man was doing that recently and it really made me angry. Piss off back to reddit if you want to do that.

can guarantee they will turn up in numbers of any threads about stag nights, sex, sex work, exploration of woman in sex work, porn

I seriously question the motivations of many on the men posting on mumsnet. Yes I’m sure some of them genuinely want to discuss parenting questions but I think many of them just want to barge into a predominantly female space and get their manly opinion across, or use it as a stick to beat their wives with “look other women think you’re unreasonable” or even worse grot about on the sex topic.

I only generally announce my male-ness when it's relevant to the thread, so if the OP has specifically asked for male opinions, or if the thread is about erectile dysfunction and I've got first hand experience I can share. I also use female pronouns for DP when I talk about her, which leads some people to guess that I'm male, when I could just ask easily be in a homosexual relationship.

Despite my comment above (which I stand by) do always notice that the sex or intimacy questions always, probably without exception, have a male poster weighing in. Very few seem to weigh in on the more domestic issues. I think MN moderators should have a duty to monitor male posters who appear to only be here for those posts.

Though it’s hard to police. It’s not a crime or against guidelines to be interested in sex, just as some women might pick and choose their posts of interest.

Oh they do

What about the women on here that aren't Mum's?

You can't police the internet, you're being ridiculous

This. I saw on a recent thread a man came on to tell us our experiences were wrong and even questioned a poster if she was mistaken about when she was born because he didnt believe she had experienced sexism/mansplaining in the work place.

Questioning if someone knows how old they are is a new level of stupidity/ignorance that shocked even me.

Go check out the bloke on the husband wearing underwear thread. Not engaging, not answering the question, just [paraphrasing]:

I'm an open minded bloke and your husband's sexual activity that clearly turns you off and you don't like is fine...at least he doesn't beat you

Helpful

I'm not going to link them because I've name changed since then, but I've started threads before primarily looking for female advice.

One when DD started her periods while DP was on holiday and uncontactable, one asking for opinions on why an ex kept trying to contact me. One asking how best to put women at ease if I'm walking home at night behind a lone woman.

I've also started a few threads asking for more generic advice, but of course most of the answers still come from women as that's the majority of users on the site.