DH’s attitude re riots etc upsetting and angering me

[Pinkycloud]

I feel so sick. Every time we talk about the riots, DH comes out with ‘well people are angry, etc’. He says he doesn’t condone violence, but there’s always a ‘but’. He voted Reform, I voted Lib Dem. I tell him he sounds racist in some of the comments he makes, which he vehemently denies.

He’s a loving, hardworking husband and father but… this! He is honestly a good man. I don’t know how to deal with it other than banning the subject. Has anyone else got very different political views from their spouse or partner?

The fact that you can't see what the Rotherham grooming gangs have got to do with this is precisely the crux of your problem.

If it was your daughter, sister or niece that had been a victim of such a gang, is this what your response would be?

So what? I don't care! Show me the white gangs?

I doubt it.

It’s this that people cannot simply seem to get their head around. I’m so fucking sorry you’re going through this. I wish I could say something more supportive but I don’t have the words.

Please know that a majority of people don’t agree. The latest poll said 85% of people are against. This is a small minority of people who are behaving this way. The rest of us are with you. Xx

I was asking the OP this question because if her DH had any friends who were non-white, perhaps he wouldn't see us as people who deserve to be attacked in the streets and have our homes and businesses burnt.
Of course, Polish, Latvian and Russian people are immigrants. But they are not currently being attacked by Nazis, so irrelevant for this conversation.

Everyone is entitled to their own opinion. We don’t have to agree with each other all the time. Your DH is not agreeing with the riots. He is understanding as to why some may be angry. Whether that is right or wrong. people have their reasons as to why they feel the need to protest. However protest is one thing. Make a stance is one thing but senseless violence and rioting is another. That can never be excused. I am sure your husband does not agree with the way people are voicing their concerns. If he did then that is not acceptable but for him to understand why people may want to protest ( in a reasonable manner ) does not make him a bad person.
my closest friend has just gained UK citizenship after arriving from a war torn country a while ago. I have spoken to her about the situation and she is understanding concerned. She has said however that she can see why British people may have concerns due to immigration. So surely if she can see why some may have concerns then so can your DH.

I don't think it's atheists claiming other religions are taking over. I doubt atheists would give a shit what someone else chooses to believe. More likely to be Christians ("tough luck") that oppose them.

100% agree. People feeling underrepresented and that they don’t matter is precisely why this is happening

Are you fucking kidding me? You think there are no white grooming gangs? You are a nasty, nasty racist.
i can tell you now if anyone I loved was raped the colour of the perpetrator’s skin would not be what would be upsetting me

I genuinely can't believe that people would write such things as

"You do know it's a Christian country don't you"

About three posters wrote that.

Honestly, you couldn't make it up.

No country is 'one religion'

The UK is not a Christian country.

There are people of many different religoons in the UK. Christianity is just one of those religions.

A lot of people are also no religon at all these days.

If you read that post again, the poster didn’t say anything of the sort. They gave an example of their local council’s knee jerk decision to ban a Christmas tree and a Christmas market. Not blaming the immigrant. Not suggesting that the mere mention of Christmas brings accusations of racism. Just an account of what it’s actually like to live in an area of high immigration, in response to another posters’ statement that our own culture isn’t being eroded. And an example of backward thinking on the part of whoever made the decision.

They also gave some pretty disturbing examples of a reluctance to integrate, a language barrier and of harassment of young girls with western values. But clearly MN posters here live in ‘naice’ areas where that kind thing doesn’t happen, so talk of it is considered racism. And so the Christmas tree thing was the only take away. I give up.

it only takes one person doing something stupid, like trying to please everyone by removing some traditionally perceived Christian tradition, for people to get upset and start seeing each new mosque as 'threatening'

I agree. But since this has literally never happened (+) except in the mind of the outraged, it reduces to "it only takes a false story, circulating on social media, that someone is trying to please everyone by removing some traditionally perceived Christian tradition", at which point it's 100% in the head of the person looking to be outraged.

I’m not too sure you actually read my post?

Where did I sympathise with either side? Where did I say that violence is the answer?

It’s people like you who are actually the problem, always looking to blame someone else and probably only read the Daily Mail 🙄

I am just so shocked by the amount of people on here that are clearly not concerned about the £8 million pounds per day of their taxes being spent on illegal immigrants! It’s outrageous and no other country would tolerate this? People are coming here due to us being a soft touch country. I have no issue with legal immigration where people are coming here to work and integrate atall. I must be a racist then even though my 2nd generation immigrant colleagues and friends agree with me!

That's interesting. A friend of mine also has DC in a catholic school and it sounds very much like your description (although probably not the same one as the local primary schools are equally diverse).

It is quite similar to how you describe things. About 30% white British kids, around 20% mainly Polish, 30% south Asian and a mix of African and mixed ethnicity.

OP read today’s opinion piece on the Guardian online re the men committing the violence. It tries to explain why so many seemingly ordinary and not violent men from many backgrounds are getting involved. Very depressing.
I’m a history fanatic and this gives a possible explanation for the numerous riots and civil conflicts in British history (far more than contained in the school curriculae)

It is ‘tough luck’ when someone is saying they are fed up of Christian’s celebrating Christmas! You’d be up in arms if this was said about another religion but it’s ok to say against Christians. You are naive and stupid to think it’s Christian’s marching and protesting and smashing up mosques.

What on earth! Have you been drinking?
I would encourage you again to actually read my posts before you comment. I have explained one of the reasons for racial tensions in places like Rotherham. If you don't understand why Rotherham is relevant, there was shocking attack on a hotel.
As for your suggestion that I am somehow encouraging rioting online is completely batshit crazy tbh and I will not be engaging with you any further. If you click on quote history, you will see what I have actually written.

There are plenty of white grooming gangs. Even some with blond women groomers fairly recently. Funnliy, nobody talks about them. I could dig them up if people really want links.

Not naive nor stupid, but hey it's only "lefties" that throw insults about isn't it?

No, I didn't say the rioters who were smashing up mosques were Christians. I said it's Christians who were more likely to oppose other religions in this country for fear of their religion being overtaken. And that was based on your "tough luck" comment. Comprehension is everything.

Yes I can or I wouldn't have said it. I worked for a building site in Tower Hamlets, they had a Christmas tree. It was ripped down twice by the same Muslim families who told us it was a Muslim area and we and the tree were not welcome. . I could go on and on about the abuse we received there, and I have before.

And no the Daily Mail wouldn't report on it how would they know 's just silly nonsense. We did however have to lodge 4 or 5 reports of more serious abuse during the 14 months on site there.

This question is somewhat ridiculous and I always steer clear of these debates on here as it's clear the audience is heavily extreme left or left wing.

However I'd like to make a few points that some of you clearly don't realise or understand.

I'm a second generation immigrant. My parents are first generation immigrants who - obviously came to the UK legally - in the 50s/60s. No we're not Muslims but we're from a cultural background that is diametrically opposed to the teachings of the Qur'an. We also as a family have worked in various parts of the Middle East over the decades.

We all voted Reform. And so did many other immigrant families we know of the same cultural background as us.

Does that make us all far right thugs?

Does that make my 80 year old mum a far right thug?

Does that make my mum's 78 year old friend a far right thug?

Well according to Comrade Stalin Starmer, it does.

This is part of the reason why everyone is so furious.

When you deliberately and calculatedly tarnish a broad brush of the British population as far right thugs, you're doing it to stifle debate.

It's censorship. This is also fascism or it's certainly what the fascists practised in nazi Germany, which is somewhat ironic don't you think?

If you look at Reform voters, they aren't all white men.

Have any of you bothered to look at who the chairman of Reform UK is?

Take a look. I think some of you might have an apoplexy. Or maybe paint him as a fat right thug too.

Also I haven't even gone into the reasons why we voted for Reform here. But I will add that earlier this year I was the victim of an attempted carjacking where I - a lone female - was then held hostage on the road by a group of immigrant men for two hours. The police did absolutely zero to help when they finally turned up and totally unbelievably, they actually took the migrant men's side. They refused to even investigate their crime. Instead they stood laughing and joking with the gang while I was left in tears talking to a fucking 12 year old officer who had just shouted at me - with his bodycam off - because I was emotional and heavily distressed.

I've reported the whole thing to my MP who wrote to the chief constable who guess what, still hasn't replied.

Is this two tier policing or....?
Answers on a postcard please.

And no, this isn't the reason why I voted Reform. But I do want a stop to mass immigration. It's causing untold problems. We've got enough of our own home grown scumbags to deal with without importing millions more en masse.

I'm not for violence and yes arrest violent people - from ALL communities. But patriots should NOT be arrested and charged for peacefully protesting as they have been since last week and even today.

All of this injustice is just making people angrier.

Hopefully that might help some of you to understand. I'm not going to bother reading any of the many nasty bile filled replies my post will attract btw. Toodle pip 👋🏼

It says in the last census in the UK, that less than 50 percent of people marked themselves as Christian.

It says that 37 per cent marked themselves as no religion.

I was brought up as no religion.

And I have always felt that Christianity is forced on parts of the population.

Fine if you want to celebrate it in your own homes, or in churches (not that most Christians do, they often never step foot in a church and only celebrate christmas). That's fine

But I take offense at having to take some of my annual leave at Christian holidays throughout the year. Thise holidays are nothing to do with me.

And I am also sick of the four month over the top Christmases that you start to see around october, that we have these days, celebrating Jesus's birthday.

It's just one religion of many.

But patriots should NOT be arrested and charged for peacefully protesting as they have been since last week and even today.

Can you give an example of patriots who has been arrested and charged for peacefully protesting? So far all the ones I've seen have pleaded guilty to causing criminal damage. 🤷‍♂️

The ones who threw bricks in a polite way? The ones singing the national anthem while they surrounded a mosque?

And no, this isn't the reason why I voted Reform. But I do want a stop to mass immigration. It's causing untold problems. We've got enough of our own home grown scumbags to deal with without importing millions more en masse.

And yet you give your reasons for voting reform away.

What is it with you and your constant demands for ‘examples’ ? Is your googling finger not working ? I can give you an example. A group of pensioners peacefully protesting the cuts to winter fuel payments in London. They got mixed up with a group of rioters and were arrested - some of them quite elderly.