Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Aibu to want to homeschool my child with everything going on

168 replies

Ella2001 · 31/07/2024 10:14

Has anyone heard of that horrid south port attack 3 children died from 17 year old boy stabbing them at a Taylor Swift dance class? 😭 with stabbings in uk AIBU to wanna home school her ? I’m honestly soo scared to send her to school. She’s only 9 months but I keep on thinking for her future . I’m in Northern Ireland I know this awful attack happened in England but it happens everywhere and I’m genuinely terrified for my baby.

OP posts:
Smeshier · 31/07/2024 14:15

SwordToFlamethrower · 31/07/2024 10:15

Absolutely. We are home educating our daughter. The world is nuts and I don't trust it with my precious child.

It always seems to me that the people who choose to home school are exactly the kind of people who shouldn’t be homeschooling their kids.

pyjamatimes · 31/07/2024 14:18

JudgeJ · 31/07/2024 13:41

How patronising are you! I don't generally watch/listen to news reports, unless it's something I've heard about elsewhere. John Lennon had been dead for about 4 days before I knew about it though that was back before we were lucky (?) enough to have constant bombardment through the internet etc. I was a SAHM then and my OH wouldn't have registered it even if he'd heard about it at work.

I’m not at all. Lennon died 44 years ago. It’s not relevant how many days it took for you 44 years ago to find out he was dead. It’s 2024. News reaches most people these days.

pyjamatimes · 31/07/2024 14:18

Smeshier · 31/07/2024 14:15

It always seems to me that the people who choose to home school are exactly the kind of people who shouldn’t be homeschooling their kids.

100%

GreatScruff · 31/07/2024 14:20

I’m genuinely terrified for my baby.

You can't lock her away like someone from Flowers in the Attic.

Tmpnmc86 · 31/07/2024 14:24

We home educate but do you know what?

It's so important to give our children gradual independence and freedom. We want them to fly! This could have happened in a park, cinema, library or anywhere.
Be careful if you decide to home educate for the reason stated. You do not want to bring up a child who is scared to go out into the world.

The best thing you can do is give them the tools to navigate getting about in the world they live in.
Work on your own fear and sadness at this awful event but don't let it limit your child.

viques · 31/07/2024 14:39

Ella2001 · 31/07/2024 10:19

Okay maybe I’ve worded wrong , I’d never lock her up my goodness !! I’m just feeling anxious for her future , the world is unpredictable and scary . Homeschooling is definitely unlikely but I’ve heard of a few other mums doing it for that type of reason and wanted to know if it was necessary

Yes the world is unpredictable, which is why smart parents realise that they have to make the effort to teach their children to deal with unpredictability.

so they teach them :

to accept that things won’t always go the way they want,

that sometimes they need to adjust their ideas and plans to accommodate others

that they won’t always succeed at something that others manage to do easily but that hard work and application can help to bridge the gap

that not all people are nice, but you still need to learn how to deal with them

that you need to learn to get along with many different sorts of people, with different mindsets and values, not just dismiss them

that you need to understand how to keep yourself safe, know when to leave a situation and how to do so safely

These are really hard lessons to teach in isolation, you need to have contact with other people, to have real life situations and predicaments to learn how to deal with situations outside the family. It takes many years to grow a confident child, with good social skills, who is able to respond to new situations by having a mental back catalogue of previous situations and their outcomes to refer to.

A child in school is learning these and many other social skills as well as academic work, they are encountering other mindsets daily, they are developing their own emotional strengths and resilience. It’s like teaching them how to cross a road safely, they need to learn how where and when to cross real roads, and also which roads you never try to cross.

MrsKnob · 31/07/2024 14:54

I home educate my daughter and I would totally recommend homeschooling, it's not something to go into lightly though.

In the meantime you sound like you have anxiety, I totally get it as I did to when my daughter was 9 months old. Maybe a trip to see your GP or some CBT would be helpful Flowers

pinkstripeycat · 31/07/2024 15:01

You do realise OP that home schooled kids don’t just stay in their home. Often they go to small groups to learn especially when subjects are too difficult for parents or the online learning isn’t suitable.

When I was at school there was no fencing or locked gates and anyone could walk in. No one did but kids would sometimes leave without telling anyone. I left and went home with my cat who was found wandering around the school. I live about half a mile away. Took my friend and cat and we walked as slowly as possible so we didn’t have to go back to lessons.

These days there’s high gates and railings and double locked security doors. You can’t just walk in to a school or walk out for that matter.

My DC1 is off to uni and I’m terrified after what happened to the students in Nottingham but life has to be lived. You can’t protect your children forever.

Kerchinger · 31/07/2024 15:09

Sadly I don't think Home Education as it's called in the UK, not Home Schooling is the solution to keeping your child safe from vile extremists but obviously it does keep them out of the broken school system.

Our DC are all home educated successfully and I am exceptionally glad they didn't lose their childhood to this antiquated school system.

The government and it's policies do not care for it's own people.

AllProperTeaIsTheft · 31/07/2024 15:14

The world is safer than it ever has been, especially in a stable, relatively wealthy country, and especially for children. Don't let the modern phenomenon of 24/7 media coverage trick you into thinking that terrible, tragic occurrences like this are more common nowadays. They aren't. Unfortunately 'The vast majority of people weren't attacked or harmed today' doesn't make a very good headline.

margegunderson · 31/07/2024 17:55

Ella2001 · 31/07/2024 10:23

Asking is it unreasonable to homeschool my child has now turned into apparently locking her up and throwing away the key. Ofcourse I’m not like that , I would take her anywhere she wanted to go but I’d be very anxious about it after that

This tragedy made the headlines because it's so rare. Your suggestion is a massive overreaction. I was brought up by a mum with massive anxiety and it was awful. Please seek help if you carry on feeling this way.

Sugarsugarahhoneyhoney · 31/07/2024 18:35

Smeshier · 31/07/2024 14:15

It always seems to me that the people who choose to home school are exactly the kind of people who shouldn’t be homeschooling their kids.

That's why I believe that people that home educate children should have stringent checks.

Littlemissnikib · 31/07/2024 18:42

That’s probably because you’re in NI to be fair. It’s been covered extensively over here.

JudgeJ · 02/08/2024 15:21

Malahide · 31/07/2024 13:57

It’s not patronising. It’s the year 2024, not 2000. Anyone on MN and therefore the internet will be getting their news instantly.

How clever you are to know the year! It's still possible to not be surgically attached to the internet and 24 hour news, even in 2024AD! Because it's an area in which I have no interest I only found out, in the pub quiz to be exact, six months ago that Taylor Swift is a woman, not someone who had ever been on my radar! I am however really hot on areas in which I am interested!

Malahide · 02/08/2024 15:34

Littlemissnikib · 31/07/2024 18:42

That’s probably because you’re in NI to be fair. It’s been covered extensively over here.

We’re part of the UK too.. it’s headline news just like every other part 🙄

Littlemissnikib · 02/08/2024 15:42

I’m not stupid - I realise that, I’ve been over there enough times. My family is from there and my best friend has lived there for 30 odd years.

I actually was trying to stick up for you - I was just thinking that it probably wouldn’t have been covered as extensively there as it was here - so enough of your rolling eyes emoji thank you very much!

SSpratt · 02/08/2024 15:56

No, I definitely wouldn’t home educate. It also depends on how educated/clever/skilled in explaining you are yourself. I know that once mine got to secondary school I wasn’t in a position to help with subjects like maths and physics. Mine are now teenagers so spent some time during covid at home and it was awful!

circular1985 · 04/08/2024 01:04

@Malahide

We’re part of the UK too.. it’s headline news just like every other part 🙄

Unless you only watch local news. The rest of the uk never knows jack shit about what's happening in NI,

New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread