Controlling for being angry at DH using oven

[SharpOliveHam]

Dh likes to eat healthily which means he never fries any food. Even the 1 cal spray is not acceptable. Fine.

But DH knows I’m very funny about the heat. Hate it and do very well to keep a cool house. I’m the person who goes around closing curtains, opening windows at the optimal time to keep things cool.

Just got off a work call to a sauna downstairs. DH has made himself a fry up (chicken sausages, egg, mushrooms, tomatoes). The kitchen is reading 26c - it was 22.5c when I looked at around 12 pm.

I told dh that this was really selfish behaviour. And now I’ve been called controlling.

AIBU?

He’s a grown adult who is perfectly entitled to cook himself food.You sound hard work and like you’re making work harder for yourself.

i also have a double coated dog who is not needing me to freeze towels and run around after him all day.
YABVU

Why not?

What's wrong with those items, not fried? Maybe the chicken sausages are UP, gut the rest is fine?

I’m annoyed because the house is now warmer than it needed to be for the rest of the day. Yesterday it hit 29c here. I managed to keep the house below 23c.

All because one person fancied a fry up.

I'm very sensitive to heat (because of a medical condition) but I wouldn't tell DH what he can and can't cook. That's ridiculous. I would just expect him to keep the doors to the kitchen shut and windows open and I would not go in there until it had cooled down. Can't your dogs stay in another room until it is cooler too?

Yeah I can understand your reasoning of wanting to keep cool but YABU massively.

He lives there & is entitled to use the oven as and when, regardless of outside temp.

Sorry on this occasion, you are being massively controlling.

Think yourself lucky. My DH once opened the patio doors to the lounge 'to let some air in' when there was a bush fire raging la few miles away!!!

I give it until the end of the week before he calls for a divorce. Absolutely bonkers behaviour.

I'm a bit confused about the non-frying, fry up husband, but I'll put that aside.

My teenage son just cooked mince, rice and peas on the hob. Our house stays quite cool with the doors and windows shut --unlike my garden office which gets a bit steamy past 3pm). Gonna go and check the temp......

I don't get too wound up about the temp in the kitchen (we need to go about our lives), but do like to keep the bedroom cooler.

U thought it wasn't a fry up? I thought he used the oven?

Here is a 🥇 for your valiant efforts!

Google 'adult cooling vest' and save yourself the mental stress, and your poor partner being constricted on what he can/can't do during half of the year.

What part of "it's his house too and he can eat what he bloody well likes" isn't getting through to you? You are being ridiculously controlling and you'll end up divorced.

Sounds like he’s getting an air fryer for Christmas…

Erm that’s because it’s getting hotter outside you narna!

You’re being ridiculous OP. I think you need one of those annoyingly vague MN hobbies.

Fry up is a full English to me. Regardless of cooking method

Controlling? You sound bonkers 😂

Or burst into flames.

OP it's hot. Have a cold shower and put some ice in your drink.

YABU and controlling.

I think it's quite interesting that we're 5 pages in, with you being unanimously told that you are unreasonable, and yet you still have not spent even one second reflecting?

So either you absolutely are controlling and I'd be wondering what else you're controlling about.

OR

This is the tip of the iceberg in respect of him being selfish/inconsiderate/you feeling like you do it all so that even if this one is YOU being unfair, you can't see that due to all the rest of your resentment.

So you fancied a slightly cooler house and he fancied a fry up.

You sound quite obsessive about the temperature control in your house. Is this some kind of OCD symptom or similar, because your reaction seems incredibly OTT.

Yes, you're being unreasonable & controlling.

Your dogs will be fine, they'll find somewhere they feel comfortable to plonk themselves. I've owned large to giant double coated dogs for many years, DH his whole life, they don't spontaneously combust in hot weather.

Houses get hot in hot weather, it's just the way it is & it won't last for long.

The fuck did I just read?

Why does your obsession with a cold house trump his right to cook lunch?

In many countries (as a PP said) 26 degrees is a totally normal room temperature, in fact in Eastern Europe that is a standard indoor temperature in winter, and the dogs don’t drop dead.

If I told my husband he couldn’t use the oven he would rightly tell me to fuck off, what a joke!

Controlling and a drama queen 😅. Wow....

But your dogs have other rooms in the house to use. Anyway, mine's been sleeping in full sun for the last 3 days and absolutely refuses to go to the house where it's cooler.
I am with your husband, I'm afraid.

Leave the bloody dogs in peace OP! They are perfectly capable of finding cool spots in the house/garden and these wouldn't not necessarily be the places you think are the coolest.
Leave the cool mats within easy access and they'll use them if they want to. Make sure they have fresh water and they'll drink it if they want to. 26C in the house is hardly tropical.
And give the dogs free access to the garden in case they prefer a particular shady spot outside,
They are dogs, they can sort themselves out if you provide the above and give them peace and quiet.
Your DH should be free to cook and eat whenever and however he wants in his own home.
Get some dans, an AC unit, whatever you need to feel better but leave these other poor souls to get on with it however they want to.

@SharpOliveHam the clue to what a fry up is, is on the name "fry"

You're crazy and totally unreasonable.