Controlling for being angry at DH using oven

[SharpOliveHam]

Dh likes to eat healthily which means he never fries any food. Even the 1 cal spray is not acceptable. Fine.

But DH knows I’m very funny about the heat. Hate it and do very well to keep a cool house. I’m the person who goes around closing curtains, opening windows at the optimal time to keep things cool.

Just got off a work call to a sauna downstairs. DH has made himself a fry up (chicken sausages, egg, mushrooms, tomatoes). The kitchen is reading 26c - it was 22.5c when I looked at around 12 pm.

I told dh that this was really selfish behaviour. And now I’ve been called controlling.

AIBU?

I wouldn’t call this controlling but selfish actually.. his need to eat is much more important than your need to keep at an ambient temperature of your choosing!!! I wondered if you’ve got thyroid issues. Seems a very strange thing to be so insistent on. He’s allowed to cook as he likes.. you need to buy a fan or air con unit and maybe think about seeing a gp if you can’t bear a temperature of 26…!

This is the same poster whose teenager pretended to go to college for 2 years because they couldn't tell them they failed their first year and did an access course instead.

Can't think why 🤔

I’d be exactly the same as you OP - I also managed to keep the house under 23 degrees yesterday and today / we both agreed the oven wouldn’t be used this week as temp shoots right up and then hard to get it down, I hate getting overheated and my partner respects this so we get creative without using an oven for a few days a year

I don't want to live on cold food all summer, thanks!

OP you sound bonkers. I have 3 double coated dogs, French doors wide open, cooling bandanas on the dogs and they lay happily in the shade in the garden or on the floor indoors with all windows and curtains open.

Frozen towels are ridiculous, their coats protect them from the heat.

We’d create as little extra heat as possible- we certainly wouldn’t create heat for everyone cooking a meal for only one person.

In the summer we use the microwave, electric pressure cooker and slow cooker when we can.

We eat a lot of foods cold the next day, so if the oven does have to go on, it provides food for more than one person and more than one day.

I’m surprised to see it’s unusual. Lots of warm countries have outdoor kitchens for hot seasons

Sounds as though this runs way deeper than a cooker / cool house issue.

I am assuming OP is in the UK. It's not that hot.

To be fair, I have chosen not to cook for the last couple of days, but her reaction is OTT.

I have a flat faced dog, so I am aware of keeping the house cool, but I don't "work" to keep it cool.

It sounds very martyrish and as if she is looking for a reason to have a moan to/about DH, rather than him actually doing anything unreasonable.

It's common for it to get warmer in the afternoon. Hive may not be that accurate, either - but it hasn't gone up 4 degrees purely because the oven was on. Nobody would need central heating if that was the case, everyone would just have range ovens.

YABU. You don't like the heat and make decisions to try and keep it cool, fine. If he was going around after you opening up all the windows and curtains because he likes the sun, you'd maybe have a point. But he made a meal for himself using an oven. Most people will do that today.

I went running in it - 6km this morning and 10km bike ride this afternoon. Didn’t even need a frozen towel.

And as for the suggestions of air con- yes great. Use fuel to create extra heat, and then a bit more fuel to cool it down again.

Madness.

Just saw thyroid mentioned maybe that’s why I detest getting even a bit overheated my internal temperature gauge must be up the creek!

I get it's annoying that the kitchen is now warmer, but you can't expect DH not to have hot food for that reason.

I prefer a cool house too but I still cook in this heat because we all want to eat cooked food.

This was exactly what I was going to suggest. And an air fryer. I’m very heat sensitive especially after growing up with aircon and my husband and I bought an air con to limit my heat drama.

the other option is make him lunch if you don’t want him to use the oven? I tend to make the lunches in the morning. We also just got a ninja grill which we use outside to prevent the house getting hot.

Good grief !

what breed of dogs do you have ?

I expect the dogs are indoors ? as it is warm outside today.

3 of my dogs are brachycephalic and I am not rushing around with frozen cold towels to cool them down !

I have just looked and it's 26.5 in this room - 3 are sleeping on the sofa beside me, and the oldest dog is in a dog bed and she is 17 tho she isn't brachycephalic

total overreaction on your part !

Ya in all honesty I'm very unlikely to throw a fit if this happens, but I will be quietly grumpy and sweaty for a while. 🤣

You ever heard of chocolate Labradors? I haven't read the whole post but I will be upset if someone else has already said this shit joke lol

Air fryer. Problem solved.

My double coated dogs are currently laid in the full sunshine in the garden where it's 30 degrees. I've also cooked a quiche and had the oven on for 40 minutes.

The only time I've taken special measures was when it was pushing 40 a couple of years ago.

Dogs don't need wet towels at 26° ffs!
Get air condition if you are so obbsesed with heat and let the poor bloke make himself some food.

You are being selfish and controlling just cool the room you are in so no one else needs to suffer.

I don’t know why you’re all arguing with her. She thinks she’s right.

please buy an air conditioning unit. They aren’t expensive and cost very little to run.

You wanted a ham salad, he wanted a fry up, you both had what you wanted. I'm cooking now and yes the house is getting warmer, I don't fancy a salad. This weather will only last a couple of days get over it.

You are being ridiculous and controlling, dictating what he can and can not eat. The house clearly would have naturally increased in temp, him having an oven on didn't increase it by 4 degrees. You chose a ham salad, he didn't want that. I live in Australia, with a double coated dog, and have never gone to the extremes you are, or objected to anyone making food when they are hungry. You are being very OTT

OP, you're being very unreasonable here I'm sorry to say. The man should be able to cook a meal in his own house without getting it in the neck. He must be walking on eggshells.

Do you have any anxiety issues or other similar issues?