Kids want Halloween over AI holiday in turkey

[amyjane1989]

My two children age 14 and 12 would prefer Halloween in the uk over an all inclusive holiday in Turkey with onsite waterparks. Am I being unreasonable to be upset about this and think my children are brats?

Well it's not up to them is it?

At those ages they want to be with their friends and think that missing out on events that everyone else is going to is devastating tragedy. Your kids are just being normal.

Did you ask them?

If you asked them to make the choice and they've made the "wrong" choice, that's a downside of giving a choice - only give it if you've got two options you're loosely happy with.

Your kids want to be with their friends which is fair enough. You're upset about this which is also fair enough.

Who decided on a water park holiday - them or you ? With a 14 yr old you're getting to the start of them wanting to spend more time with their friends, and less time with you. That's part of growing up.

You you offer for each of them to bring a friend with them ?

Ah let them have Halloween. You can go to Turkey any time of year.

I said I am booking our holiday to Turkey in October half term as the temperature will be more manageable and less busy. We can get some sunshine whilst it’s cold back home and be a nice break between summer hols and Christmas. I have also told them it’s the only time my partner and I can get off together apart from Christmas due to new jobs, so it’s the only time we can go on holiday this year and they both said no we won’t be coming.

They both chose the hotel. They love the hotel it’s for them not us. Their only gripe is Halloween. Yet they don’t even know if their friends will be home then either.

Kids prefer low key festive day at home with their friends … which makes them brats?
Surely you are the brat for moaning about not getting your own way?

Where about in Turkey? I've been the middle of October and it's rained and been chilly. How good is the AI? Tbf Turkey isn't somewhere I've enjoyed. But as said, teens want to be with their friends.

It will be cold and miserable in October, I don't blame them.

YABU to give them a choice! For the reasons you state, book it!

I can't think why they wouldn't want to go on holiday with you and your partner.

If they don't want to go, then don't go. They'll be grumpy and ruin it.

Any chance to leave them with grandparents and have a weekend away with your husband, somewhere of your choice?

Are you sure Halloween is the reason they don’t want to go?

Do they get on with your partner? Is your relationship with your partner ok or is it strained?

You might find they don’t want to go because they don’t want to go and Halloween is just an easy reason.

@Yousaidwhatagain I went to Turkey during the October half term and it was mid 20's daily, lovely and warm for sightseeing. I will always go in September/ October when temperatures are manageable and in between 25 -28°>

Would you be taking them some other time if it wasn't for your new partner? I don't think they can be described as brats for choosing the simpler, cheaper option.

Would be south Turkey near Cyprus so better time to go. North Turkey Izmir is colder. So sad that they choose Halloween over family time and their only holiday abroad. Expect it at 14 but not 12. My son is autistic at 12 years old so sees the world in one way and what he wants. Just know that as a child I loved holidays and loved my friends. My family and friends are shocked by their decision and they just said do I won’t go.

Don’t do it. You will have mournful faces and waste your money. We learned this the hard way. Halloween is a massive deal for tweens/ early teen years whether you like it or not. Think of a big social event that means a lot to you then think how you’d feel if you had to miss it

But you can do halloween stuff in October in general? Pumpkin picking is usually on for a good couple of weekends.

Is it the fact they can only go trick or treating actually on halloween?

If they had said they didn’t want to be at home for Halloween but instead wanted to go on holiday to Turkey, that would have been bratty behaviour. Saying they aren’t bothered about going to Turkey and would rather spend time at home with their friends isn’t bratty. They are just not acting like you expected, that’s what teens do.

Save your money let them stay at home.

At those ages my children wouldn't get the choice. The holiday would be booked and they would be going. The preference isn't brattish but the refusal to go absolutely is.

It’s quite harsh calling them brats. You want to go on the holiday they don’t. Why is their preference evidence of them being brats but your preference doesn’t make you one? Surely wanting to go on holiday and getting stroppy when others don’t is arguably being more brattish?

14 is mid teen. I would have preferred Halloween as well.

On another thread l was the horrible teen who ran away at 14 rather than be forced to go on a family holiday.

They’ll be grumpy and unpleasant on holiday.

Go somewhere for a few days and be back for Halloween.

Surprised some people expect Turkey to be cold and miserable in October. I’ve been to Turkey once- in October- and it was definitely swimsuit and sunbathing weather. In fact I stayed in the shade as it was too hot for me. July/August would be far too hot in Turkey for many Brits.

They are children. Mine are a similar age. This kind of thing would not be optional and not be up for discussion. We would book it and we would all be going!
A 12 year old doesn’t get to refuse to go on family holiday.
They’re not brats but you’ve dug yourself a hole by even hinting that it was optional.