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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Kids want Halloween over AI holiday in turkey

139 replies

amyjane1989 · 29/07/2024 13:34

My two children age 14 and 12 would prefer Halloween in the uk over an all inclusive holiday in Turkey with onsite waterparks. Am I being unreasonable to be upset about this and think my children are brats?

OP posts:
TheShiningCarpet · 29/07/2024 18:08

Franjipanl8r · 29/07/2024 17:57

You’re assuming kids give two shits about a hot holiday or nice weather in general. My kids are much happier splashing around in the rain and running about in the woods with family and friends than flying abroad for some sunshine.

It’s almost like it’s not really about Halloween isn’t it? Like perhaps it’s about not being with an abusive step parent?

perhaps read the thread before you start waxing lyrical about glorious family time 😬

Franjipanl8r · 29/07/2024 18:14

TheShiningCarpet · 29/07/2024 18:08

It’s almost like it’s not really about Halloween isn’t it? Like perhaps it’s about not being with an abusive step parent?

perhaps read the thread before you start waxing lyrical about glorious family time 😬

Edited
Show quote history

I did read the thread thanks. I chose to ignore the massive leap in assumptions that everyone else made and just responded to what the OP is actually asking in her own posts.

TheShiningCarpet · 29/07/2024 18:16

Sorry which assumption?

Caroparo52 · 29/07/2024 18:19

I've been to Turkey October HT. It was coolish temperatures with on off rain. Definitely not last of summer sunshine at all. Pool was freezing.
Most restaurants were closed for winter already. We needed jumpers not swimsuits.
Think you need to do more research. You may be very disappointed...

NeverEnoughPants · 29/07/2024 18:25

If they love Halloween, then maybe something like PortAventura beat Barcelona instead? I would suggest Disneyland Paris, but it will be colder. They do Halloween really well.

Olympics2024 · 29/07/2024 18:25

Franjipanl8r · 29/07/2024 18:14

I did read the thread thanks. I chose to ignore the massive leap in assumptions that everyone else made and just responded to what the OP is actually asking in her own posts.

Show quote history

People aren’t making assumption. They’re reading what the OP has written on her two other threads, which both focus on her complaining about her partner picking on her children with a side comment that he is a cheat.

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 29/07/2024 18:30

Boltonb · 29/07/2024 15:35

You need to reassess your life and your opinions.

You are calling your children brats (one of whom is ND) for not wanting to go on holiday with a man who:

•Is emotionally abusive (your words)
•constantly criticises your children, including accusing your ND son of simply being “badly behaved”
•has taken money from you for the house but refused to have you on the mortgage/deeds so you have no security
•had an affair with a woman at work, and has told you that he doesn’t trust you
•gets sulky and cross when you go to the office/go on a night out/leave the house.

Add to this that you’ve said you can’t afford to leave because of the debt that you’re in - why spend money on a holiday?

Advanced search, as suggested by a previous poster shows that you are not in a good relationship, and your children are suffering from living with your boyfriend

Edited

I don’t blame the children for not wanting to holiday with this man!

Mind you - even before I knew the back story, I couldn’t see how they were brats for not wanting an expensive holiday.

OCDmama · 29/07/2024 18:49

Not wanting to go on a holiday abroad and wanting to do something at home is the opposite of bratty.

Also, why would they want to go on holiday with your boyfriend? Why should they give a crap about you two having some romantic getaway?

TorroFerney · 29/07/2024 18:51

TinyYellow · 29/07/2024 13:37

At those ages they want to be with their friends and think that missing out on events that everyone else is going to is devastating tragedy. Your kids are just being normal.

Exactly this, my child used to check - we won't be away at Halloween??? - and we never really did anything major for Halloween either.

Sunnydiary · 29/07/2024 19:08

Well I just can’t imagine why your poor DC would prefer to avoid a holiday with your abusive piece of shit boyfriend who is horrible to them, according to you on previous threads.

How about putting them first for a change eh?

mathanxiety · 29/07/2024 19:14

Testina · 29/07/2024 14:30

Hmmmmm. I searched your name as I wondered if this was actually their stepdad or your boyfriend.

Not 3 months ago you were posting that you were in an emotionally abusive relationship with a man who had an affair and who was horrible to your kids - whom his own adult children no longer bothered with.

Maybe they prefer the make-believe horror of Hallowe’en rather than the day to day shit of being with a man who is nasty to them, ramped up by the close quarters of a holiday?

They’re not brats - they quite reasonably don’t want to be on holiday with this bullying arsehole. Did you take up the advice last time to speak to Women’s Aid?

Oh and it’s hard to leave because you’re in debt - so why the holiday anyway?

Yes to all of this.

mathanxiety · 29/07/2024 19:14

MrsTerryPratchett · 29/07/2024 14:55

I suspect this will the the start of a lot of excuses they make to not spend time with you and this partner. Start listening to them. They are prioritising something fun over something with him. You are choosing him over them.

This ^

SonicTheHodgeheg · 29/07/2024 19:21

Having read the updates… do you really think that your kids are brats or do you want them to fall in line to make your life easier ? I mean do you want them to come on holiday so you don’t have to bear the brunt of your partner’s anger ?

Your kids sound sensible not wanting to go. You are the best prioritising 🍆 over your kids wellbeing.

ssd · 29/07/2024 19:55

Op has run a mile

tuvamoodyson · 29/07/2024 20:00

Starlight1979 · 29/07/2024 14:17

My family and friends are shocked by their decision

What have your friends and family got to do with anything? Why have you told them? And why would they even be bothered??? If one of my friends told me her (teen) children didn't want to go on holiday with her I don't think I'd be "shocked" 😂

Me neither…I couldn’t even raise an eyebrow!

HappierTimesAhead · 29/07/2024 20:14

What is the point of these threads? @amyjane1989 did you really expect everyone to agree with you and say oh yeah your kids are such brats and you are amazing for dragging them on a cheap AI holiday in October?

VickyEadieofThigh · 29/07/2024 21:44

HappierTimesAhead · 29/07/2024 20:14

What is the point of these threads? @amyjane1989 did you really expect everyone to agree with you and say oh yeah your kids are such brats and you are amazing for dragging them on a cheap AI holiday in October?

...with your unpleasant partner, who is abusive towards your kids and you, whom you've previously said you want to leave but can't afford to.

Crysti · 29/07/2024 22:41

Just read the updates from other posters. Brats? Really?

Crysti · 29/07/2024 22:43

AGodawfulsmallaffair · 29/07/2024 16:31

Well, no wonder. Quite a bit of missing info!

Show quote history

Oh ffs 🤦‍♀️ any wonder they don’t want to go!!!

Crysti · 29/07/2024 22:44

Createausername1970 · 29/07/2024 17:19

And here's your answer OP.

Your "brattish" ND 12 year old that sees the world his way, would appear to be seeing it a very good way.

Some of the comments on here are harsh, but if what you have previously posted is true, why aren't you doing something about improving their situation rather than trying to enforce something that might be very far from what most of us would class as a "family holiday"

Show quote history

Jesus it gets worse

OP what the hell are you at? And to call them brats for not wanting to go!

Daisy12Maisie · 30/07/2024 08:57

I actually had a horrendous time in turkey last summer. My son picked up a bug and was ill for the whole holiday and several weeks when we got home. An absolute waste of money.
I just wouldn't go if I was you. It's not the right time if the kids are at the ages where they don't want to go. In a few years you can just go away without them.

ButWhatAboutTheBees · 30/07/2024 11:18

I don't think OP's coming back after being soundly told calling her children brats is uncalled for, especially the fact one is autistic, and her previous threads being found...

Mummadeze · 30/07/2024 17:50

I booked Tenerife last October half term and my autistic DD was gutted because of Halloween. I felt terrible. There were actually loads of Halloween celebrations in the hotel which was amazing, but she would rather have been trick or treating locally with her friends. I will never make that mistake again as the holiday was meant to be nice for her at the end of the day.

ThisRedLion · 30/07/2024 18:06

You go to Turkey and leave your kids with a family member if your able 12 and 14 not really a choice for them....

wooda180 · 30/07/2024 18:27

I'd rather have Halloween in the UK than a week in turkey. I love Halloween and hate resorts and the heat would make it so much worse for me too. They're allowed to have a preference just as you are but in the end your the parent so if you decide you're going then you're going