To think Tattle Life gossiping is necessary?

[bottomsup12]

Immediately thoughts are that it's not nice to gossip and everyone should "be kind". However, in this day and age of social media influencers etc, everyone acknowledges that people show the best bits of their life, all the ups and rarely the downsides.

We are also told to stop comparing to others on this basis as we never know what's going on behind someone's glamorous life.

Therefore, I put it to you MNers, that the b*tchiness that occurs on Tattle Life (and is IS very much so) is a necessary antidote to the fake lives we can't help comparing ourselves to.

Instead of sitting here wondering how everyone else manages to have such a great time while you're broke hardly able to pay your bills, it's reassuring to see other people cutting through the crap and pointing out the other parts of their life.

I'd argue it's a necessary by product of social media antics and the naturally occurring ying to the social media glamorous yang!

What are your thoughts?

I disagree, the forums I’ve read there has been about 2 disagreements in 3 years.
Please don’t refer to my experiences as ’ bollocks’ either just because they may be different to yours.

So different to this virtuous website! 😂

Never heard of Tattle Life until now.

Some of the nastiness on here (some personally directed at me) has been really upsetting in the past. I try to be extra careful how I word things so I don’t get piled on but it can still happen (god forbid you don’t blindly support someone just because they happen to be a woman).

Although I’m not registered on Tattle I feel it’s a much safer place to comment negatively on someone (I don’t mean bitch) than it is here.

On here I’ve been called vile, that I’m a terrible mother (I’m neither of those things) and have felt quite sick and upset (so much so once I came off here altogether for a few years - all because I had the audacity to say I thought it would be easier to leave an abusive relationship if you suddenly found yourself with a billion pounds in your bank account - boy was I piled on for that, it affected me emotionally for quite some time as I was new on here and the vitriol was shocking to me).

I find it hilarious, some of them are very witty. When there's news reports of a scandal involving an unnamed celeb I go there to find out who it is before they're publicly named.

There's plenty if bitchiness here, especially around weight and some posters advocate for disordered eating/extreme dieting, there's some extreme class snobbery and superiority, extreme entitlement about inheritance and a lot of boasting about salaries.

Some of the tattlers on the threads I read are really, really funny so I also like it for that.

I think that's a fair statement, insecurity of where you and your child will end up and if it'll be any safer than where you are does hold people back, worrying the abuser may get custody of the child if you have no where to stay. Worrying about not being to feed your child. Money helps in these situations.

Exactly. Also, the celebs being bitched about would have to go to the website, and search for themselves to read what was being commented on in order to be ‘upset’.

Some posters on here really arse lick celebs though, it’s odd.

That was the point I was trying to make. It was quite a number of years ago now and I was speaking very much from experience (being broke but newly single mother due to toxic ex). I was very vulnerable and sensitive at the time so the vitriol I got for that (saying it was easier to leave if you suddenly became extremely rich) was mind blowing. I did come back on here a few years later (with a name change) and a tougher skin.

But my point is it's a natural reaction arising from the toxic positivity of lots of social media these days

I've never been on it, but that sounds like bollocks tbh. I don't think it's remotely true that all we see in the media or on social media is relentlessly or toxically positive. There's plenty of negativity without feeling the need to go and help perpetuate it by spewing bile on horrible sites. If you don't like what media and social media are feeding you, switch off.

@HooverTheRoof

I think the people who post on there get a deep sense of satisfaction from being utterly horrible bullies. They think it's justified to do it on there because they are "exposing influencers" but actually it's just heir own innate nastiness. It's not helpful to anyone, they're kidding themselves

I think influences are often passive bullies. They get away with making the rest of us feel shit about our ‘less perfect than their’ lives.

An influencer and I shared a mutual friend. When the influencer had her first baby, there she was, day 3 post delivery, posting pictures of a family picnic (her, hubby and new baby) on the village green. The mutual friend said “I feel sorry for mrs influencer. She’s the same as the rest of us- sore boobs, sore down below, and she has to out and make beautiful pictures for her inst feed”.

err….no she doesn’t.

They get all that comes to them.

I agree that it’s a natural response in some ways, but the problem isn’t fake things online imo, it’s that we are seeing way too much of people’s lives online. We haven’t evolved to cope with knowing so much about people we don’t even know, it’s totally mind boggling and pointless that we have so much useless information at our fingertips. I agree with pp, we need to find more valuable ways to spend our time.

Definitely

So while you are on Mumsnet you want to police Tattle?
What about Twitter, or Reddit, will you be telling the people on https://www.reddit.com/r/Fauxmoi/ they should be nicer?

I think people are very nasty on here but don't see the irony in calling nastiness out on tattle.

That’s why I was so shocked at the vitriol piled on me for saying it. It’s a completely unrealistic scenario anyway (no one is suddenly going to find a billion pounds in their bank account) but I was trying to make a point that one of the most difficult aspects of leaving is lack of money, if that was alleviated leaving would be somewhat more in reach (not that I ever want to touch on that subject again lol, I steer well away).

It is so vile on there. I'm sure there might be some nicer people but a lot are so bitter.

Check out the Kat Farmer, Does my Bum look 40 threads. They are vicious towards her.

I will always champion places for women to be unapologetically sharp and witty and by turns kind and wise at times too. Tattle and Mumsnet come in for a lot of spite because mainly women use them but the worst forums have mainly male users and they are beyond disgusting.

I agree. Growing up in the 70s if you didn’t like someone in the public eye you either kept it to yourself or just casually said to a friend or family member I don’t like that person and that’s as far as it went. Nowadays everything is all over the internet and everything you do or say is scrutinised and criticised globally. I would hate to be famous. If I had a YouTube channel it would be one where I didn’t show myself.

@HolyGround13 its not that we are seeing way too much of peoples’ lives on line (although that is also true), it’s that these people are only choosing to show us the good parts of their lives, so we are only getting part of the picture. We only get to see the immaculately dressed children, the perfect houses, the perfect lives. And on the back of this fake perfection these people get sponsored by way of cars, furniture, holidays, discounts etc.

I'd imagine a lot of the vitriol is because they have about here.

AND it's hilarious!

Yeah, I agree!

I hate influencer culture, so I don't follow many, but honestly, Tattle is a strange place, the fact that they spend their lives following people, just to run back to an online forum to tear them apart.

There was one thread on there I've heard about where they followed someone to a tanning shop and took pictures of her car and posted them! very odd! they've also apparently reported her to social services and to the DVLA because she has panic attacks, that's not gossip, that's really dangerous destructive behaviour.

I really love that account. Some people are just jealous bitches.

I don't have a Tattle account because it's vile but I have looked on occasion when it's been brought up on accounts I follow. Alice Evans is one such victim of Tattle. The woman does not always behave in a becoming fashion but she's been through an awful lot and I empathise as I've been through similar. Tattle is absolute vile towards her.

Recently, she has started naming and shaming and is being threatened with all sorts by the people who have been openly abusing her and her children. It's amazing that they want to continue to do this in disguise but the moment they are outed, they are screaming legal action and the police. If you want to abuse people online, they don't be such a cowardly cunt. Use your own name 🤷🏻‍♀️