To think Tattle Life gossiping is necessary?

[bottomsup12]

Immediately thoughts are that it's not nice to gossip and everyone should "be kind". However, in this day and age of social media influencers etc, everyone acknowledges that people show the best bits of their life, all the ups and rarely the downsides.

We are also told to stop comparing to others on this basis as we never know what's going on behind someone's glamorous life.

Therefore, I put it to you MNers, that the b*tchiness that occurs on Tattle Life (and is IS very much so) is a necessary antidote to the fake lives we can't help comparing ourselves to.

Instead of sitting here wondering how everyone else manages to have such a great time while you're broke hardly able to pay your bills, it's reassuring to see other people cutting through the crap and pointing out the other parts of their life.

I'd argue it's a necessary by product of social media antics and the naturally occurring ying to the social media glamorous yang!

What are your thoughts?

There is a real mix on there. I was reading a thread about an influencer with a dodgy boyfriend and they wanted nothing more than for her to leave him and get away. There can be some really interesting analysis on some threads on disordered eating, class, patriarchal expectations, misogyny. Unfortunately there is also a lot of awfulness as everyone knows.

The worst is when they rip into children, some of them very young. I remember Charlotte Dawson’s son being called a little ginger shit and worse and he was only two

This. Some people are just horrible on it, but sometimes it provides a space to critique their behaviour. But I’d say maybe 50% comments are horrible and 50% constructive. But I have seen other tattle users call out other users for taking it too far and commenting on someone’s appearance etc.

I think it’s needed as well because of you call an influencer out by posting on their post they just delete the comment and block you.

It’s no worse than here most of the time.

Just been on there to see what you’re talking about and good God, what a toxic dumpster fire of a forum. A load of people obsessed with people they clearly hate. Surely there are more constructive things they could be doing with their time? Absolutely pathetic.

I have gone on there to find out names and background which in my opinion should be fully publishable by the regular media. I must say the racism, xenophobia and general vileness of some of the posts on there is eye opening, but it does serve to remind me that I am very much not on the same page as a substantial section of the population.

I was an early user of Tattle. I thought I was going mad about the inconsistencies of the stories Jack Monroe told and it was nice to know I wasn’t alone!

I'm not a tattle member but I do read some threads, usually current affairs, not influencer threads because I'm not really arsed by any influencer. So I've not really got an opinion on that. I know some are problematic and I know some get very negative things said about them, but if it wasn't tattle they'd probably have somewhere far less regulated to go.

I do enjoy how supportive the posters are to one another. They seem to genuinely get on and support one another without it being cliquey. I love my mumsnet pals I've made and I hope whatever your platform if you're finding an online village, then wherever you post they only ever bring good to your online experience.
I say it on every thread before it's inevitably deleted, I'm a fan of people building online communities and friendships. It's great for ND posters who can't maintain real life friendships as much as they'd like.

Tattle/mumsnet do that with posters bonding over mutual things, then I'm happy people are happy.

It must be hard seeing negative things said about you if you're an influencer, I think that you'd need a very tough skin to put yourself out there. Sometimes I say things about myself on here that are open to criticism and I end up defending my life choices to what could essentially be a very lonely person in their mums spare room firing shots at anyone, so I do feel influencing is not for anyone unable to cope with the harsh reality of the Internet. Tattle/mumsnet/anywhere will have people find ways to discuss you negatively if you're out there.

I am a fan of folks building friendships and communities online to be each others village. I can't really knock anything that gives people comfort.

But I would always discourage for a plethora of reasons that anyone choosing to put themselves online does not extend that to their DC. It's not fair that kids with no choice are shared to public audiences.

I read tattle very occasionally for a laugh. The MN thread there is hilarious. My problem with many tattle threads are that they slip from legitimate criticism to body shaming and commenting on people's looks SO frequently. Again it's a fine line. For example I used to vaguely know an influencer who had clearly had cosmetic surgery who insisted she hadn't. I'm sure there are thousands. That needs to be called out IMO because she's influencing young women and it's completely irresponsible to pretend you're not surgically enhanced. But to then slag off her entire appearance and everything about her appearance/weight just isn't acceptable.

I've read some of the things written about Charlotte Taylor, it's horrific, I'd love to see the woman lined up who feel comfortable to make viscous comments about her weight and appearance. I'm sure they're all supermodels 🤨

not only to go after her but the appearance of her children, I don't always think everything Charlotte does is perfect but her tattle thread is far beyond the realms of normal bitching. I hope she dosnt read it, because if I saw people write those things about me I don't think I'd be here tommorow

No it’s an absolute cesspit and brings out the worst in people who hide behind their usernames. You shouldn’t need a nasty website to understand that the life celebrities and influences put forward is massively edited and they only show the good stuff.

It is worse than here.

They make completely personal attacks about people’s bodies, faces, teeth, hair - you name it. They speculate that influencers have eating disorders, cocaine addictions, alcoholism, are terrible mothers…it can be very nasty indeed.

I think picking apart the lies of social media is fine but some comments are deeply unpleasant

I'm put off the site by the casual nastiness of some poster

Gossip is never necessary. If people tried unleashing all that spite in more productive directions then they might find themselves less dissatisfied with their lives.

Aside from anything else it's mind-numbingly boring. I'd rather read a good book.

If tattle has been so instrumental in changing attitudes to ad disclosures and spon con and are truly exposing dodgy influencers then they themselves should be open to being scrutinised for ethics and transparency.

If posters had to put their real names alongside their ‘truth telling’ how many would do it? And how many would never be seen or heard from again because their only purpose in being on there is to be vindictive and bullying?

And for full transparency I was once a registered user but the glee I witnessed in kicking people for the sake of kicking them was too much after a while and I am ashamed I was on there now.

But influencers, especially family vlogger types, are worse than celebrities in many ways. Celebrities are often famous as a byproduct of a talent or profession. Influencers often set out to be public figures and flog a toxic version of perfection and their children's safety and privacy in return for money and fame.

I think most responsible parents would be extremely wary about putting their kids online, especially with the amount of perverts and weirdos around. It is often totally possible for random people to work out where these kids live and go to school etc. It is so so concerning and yet they just don't care. They deserve to be shamed for this but because they control the comments left on their posts and videos then it isn't obvious to unsuspecting supporters just what these influencers are actually selling i.e. their kids.

but there are genuinely lots of people who aren't broke. i know 3 people IRL (not social media influencers) who have been gifted houses in London. Those are the people who have told me. None of them earn a great deal, so they lead otherwise average lives, so you can imagine that for those who get gifted houses and have great salaries- they can afford lavish lives. Statistically, those who are higher up the income distribution get more help from parents, but they probably don't feel the need to disclose it as they would rather people think that they can afford it all by themselves.

So it would stand that for a social media influencer who is in the top 2% of her profession (or they realistically wouldn't have so many followers), who probably comes from a well off family (hence why she could probably work for free to build up her following), would live a lavish lifestyle even if you don't consider the sponsorships.

I like Tattle Life. it provides balance in a world that is riddled with inconsistencies, fake news and influencers bullshitting the bullshitters. It’s also very funny!

I like Mumsnet too. I feel MN is more frivolous. And has the answers to the more humble questions. (E.g beans on toast UPF?)

Both have their place in society. Both will have nasty posters as will every forum online☺️

I’ve browsed when I’ve got too much time on my hands and MN hits a boring patch.

I do think that a whole lot of it is just vile - wading in on the family members (including children) of some instagrammers and being really insulting eg calling people’s children brats and fathers paedophiles.

that said - they nicknamed Stacey Solomon’s son Rex as Mick (Hucknell) which I thought was hilarious.

Disagree. The comments there are vile.

I think it's very weird to spend so much time talking about people they dislike. I'm not usually one to cry "jealousy" but I think a lot of it over there is rooted in jealousy and being unhappy with their own lives.

I pop onto tattle every so often (was actually on it yesterday) because it’s interesting sometimes to be able to read critical comments that align with my opinions on particular people.

Sometimes they can go too far and I don’t indulge by reading any further on that thread if I feel it’s too much, but there are definitely some people in the public eye whose behaviour or personality are worth criticisms. Some people on there are quite witty in their observations and I prefer to read those threads. In fact I haven’t registered to comment because I don’t feel I’m witty enough, lol.

If I’m watching something and the person doesn’t seem authentic, or they seem full of themselves, I might pop on to tattle and see if others think the same (they do).

MN is no different from Tattle Life.

Also why does one need to pick apart aspects of someone else's life to make themselves feel better?

I agree that the comments about her appearance are awful and nobody should ever insult children BUT she really is the absolute worst for selling out her kids. All this talk about being a lovely mother who puts her children first and yet she places them in such obvious danger and invades their privacy constantly. There is simply no excuse for pimping your kids out for engagement, likes and advertising campaigns. They are not old enough to provide informed consent and it's massively exploitative. If this happend in any other industry then huge questions would be asked and I honestly think social services would be involved.

I'd argue it's a necessary by product of social media antics and the naturally occurring ying to the social media glamorous yang!

Nope. It's more pointless social media shit to pile on top of the "glamorous" social media shit.

Why can't people live their own lives insted of endlessly prying into other people's (made-up) lives?