To have told son I couldn’t go swimming as I have a period

[Bouliegirl]

This morning DS8 asked if we could go swimming. I told him no, as I have a period. But we could probably got at the weekend. He was happy enough and shuffled off

My MIL was horrified that I told him this and said that I shouldn’t be talking about periods with a male relative

You literally just told another woman that there's something medically wrong with her because her periods are different to yours....

And you ‘literally’ (I guess you are very young by your childish impulsive way of typing) are being very prickly. I will assume it’s your time of the month and you don’t always spit your dummy out.

no reply needed

Period swimwear specifically says it's only good for use on light days or as a backup to a tampon. It can only absorb 1-2tsp of blood.

On heavy days I am changing a ultrasuperplus tampon (holds 15-20g) every hour - at which point the backup ST also has a lot of blood. So I could spend £60 on a special swimsuit that would perhaps if I am lucky give me 20 minutes in the water before I'd be at risk of trailing clouds of blood behind me. I would really much rather keep the money and go swimming for as long as I like on whichever other days of the month when I'm not bleeding.

We need to talk about periods more because as this thread shows, the lucky women whose periods are light have absolutely no idea that other women have different experiences.

Yanbu @Bouliegirl

What the what?

She hasn't shown any temper at all.

You just didn't like what she calmly and succinctly said.

Responding like a man with no understanding of women.

MIL is unreasonable.
Boys should learn about periods. Well done to you, Mum! 👏🏻

Also, fully sympathise with you, as I definitely can’t swim during the first few days of a period. Not pleasant at all. You offered him a compromise and he happily accepted.

I think all the posters who say that all women can go swimming while having a period are being unreasonable.

Not every woman can use a mooncup or tampon or feels up to swimming when on a period.

The lack of understanding on here is depressing.

But one is very necessary.

Your misogyny is really shining through here and if anyone's displaying a very unpleasant temper it is you.

Imagine 'explaining' to a woman how she experiences her own bodily functions, and presuming to tell her what her own periods are actually like. And then suggesting, when she understandably objects, that of course she must be hormonal.

Who needs the manosphere, eh? Shame MN is full of these repulsively sexist attitudes these days. I wonder where they might be coming from?

What's wrong with you?

The rudeness!

Absolutely. And instantly followed through with the derisory bullying on the following post.

Posters like this should not be allowed to ruin this site.

That's a very unique username you've given yourself, well done.

What age is she stuck in?! Of course you can discuss periods with a male 🙄🤨 God forbid maybe one day he may have a friend, partner, relative, colleague, whoever that is a female who has a period. How ridiculous. But I would also be teaching him you can swim on a period - if you wish to - tampons, period swimwear etc. exist. Don't add to the outdated taboo and stigma around periods, they are an absolutely normal human function and shouldn't be a barrier and we should be educating our sons as much as our daughters.

I know this post isn't about sanitary products but for those who suffer from flooding and very heavy periods, have you tried a menstrual disc? Sit in a different position to a cup and hold SO much more, I think a mooncup can hold around 25mls but discs around 60/70mls. You can even have sex with them in as they sit higher. Obviously they won't be suitable for all but as they're a relatively new product some people night not being aware of them and want to investigate further.

To answer your OP, nothing wrong (and everything right) about teaching your son about periods. Could he infer from your response that ALL women can't swim on their period, possibly but honestly at 8 I wouldn't worry about that, lots of time for all the ins and outs so to speak.

Even if you have been referred it takes time
For me - 8 years of struggling before a GP agreed to refer me, a year wait for an endometriosis specialist, 3 months wait for MRI (just had that)
Now I wait 6 weeks for results, then I don't know how long for another appointment and multi disciplinary meeting, then 3 months menopause...
It can end up being over 3 years and still nose resolved

Oh I thought you were going to say it was a lie.
As for your MIL - what she's thinking? Boys and girls should know the facts of life!

That must be so frustrating. I hope you get an answer and a treatment plan soon.

I've been seen by lots of medics. I've had the dildo-cam more times than enough, after 6 cycles of IVF (male factor infertility!) the Dildo-Cam asked me to marry it. There is nothing wrong with me! I have no medical issues. And yet, the first 3 days of my period I have to change a super plus tampon every 1-1.5 hours and ensure I wear a pad also. My periods have been like that since I started them in 1994! There is no medical help for the millions of healthy women, who unfortunately have very heavy periods and we have to put up with it if we want to keep our wombs.

tell me you are a troll without telling me you are a troll

@otravezempezamos I have a diagnosis - stage 4 endometriosis with kissing ovaries and bladder and bowel involvement

Treatment at the moment is mefanamic acid, morphine and other pain relief until they can get a plan for surgery as it needs an endo surgeon and a bowel/bladder one

Nothing moves fast so that's 8 days a month I don't really function

After 15 pages of people being told they CAN go swimming on their period or there's something drastically wrong with their body I'm not surprised.

And despite that, their response was measured and nothing to suggest they had a nasty temper, unlike the PP’s spiteful response!

I had v heavy periods when I was peri, but one day I was on holiday in Rome and it was just so hot. I thought 'fuck it' , amdt he cold water seemed to stop the flow.

Do you really think that all these women with heavy or painful period’s haven’t thought to consult a doctor? Jesus wept.

I was on tranexamic and mefanamic acid and still suffered. I had the vag cam a few times and other tests including colposcopy and endometrial biopsy but all normal.

Unfortunately the solutions suggested to me beyond what I was already taking were contraceptive so it wasn’t until I was prepared to give up on my hopes of a second baby that I was able to go on the mini pill which stopped my periods altogether (and is fantastic).

@otravezempezamos

“ I will assume it’s your time of the month and you don’t always spit your dummy out.”

why are you so misogynistic?

Quite. I'm amazed at the responses on this thread telling other women what they can do on their period.