to not like people bringing other children who are not invited to a party?

[Youwouldntlastandh0ur]

If you were having, say, a birthday party, and you invited the children, but the parent wanted to bring the child's siblings or another tag-along friend, wouldn't it annoy you?

It would really piss me off if someone bought another child who wasn't invited with them, because my kid (unless they somehow were friends or knew each other) would barely know them and I'd think that it wouldn't be fair on said child because they wouldn't know the person whose party it is.

Probably gets worse when the uninvited ones expect party bags and food.

It's rude! Especially when you've only catered for so many kids.
Had a party years ago for my son- church hall, magician, disco,buffet etc. One family had 5 kids, only the eldest was invited. The Mum disappeared in all the chaos and left all 5 kids- one was still in nappies!
I didn't have the Mum's number, so tried to message her through Facebook but she didn't read it. I then had 2 of them crying at the end because they couldn't have a party bag!
She never got invited again!

Surely it's the parents who are entitled, not the children 😂.

If you take a child to a party, they're going to... party!

@Barleysugar86 if she wanted your toddler there then she should have included them on the invite too, then you would have know they were also welcome. Bit odd to be sad when someone you didn't invite doesn't turn up. 😬

A lot of parties need paying for upfront. It's unfair of parents to turn up with other children and expect them to be ablexto join in if they haven't been paid for.

The kids sometimes end up being entitled too, as a result of parental entitlement.

Venues around here often turn a blind eye, or there are drop outs on the day etc. At DC1's party we invited a few younger siblings who know DC2 to the attached soft play and the venue didn't charge for them which was very generous.

If the toddler comes along to a party, we do bring an additional little gift. But most of the parents we know are actively trying to cut down on toys and stuff rather than accumulate more! So it's normally something like a sticker book or some nice pens or pencils in a travel case.

Fucking hell! Never seen anything like that, way to ensure no one in the class ever invites your child again.

It's rude to just turn up with them without asking the host first. Someone should never just drop two kids off instead of one. If someone can't get childcare for their other child then that's tough, that's just the reality of trying to accommodate more than one child.

although I am assuming she's asked and been told its fine.

Yes this is the common tactic of the cheeky fucker, they put the hosting parent on the spot by turning up with all four kids on the day when the mum/dad has 101 other things to do and doesn't want a confrontation. The CFs bank on it.

This wasn't drop outs, it was add ons. I don't blame businesses gor charging extra people to stop parties knowingly under estimating to start with.

This. It's really annoying but they rely on people being too polite and too busy to say anything.

No I don't blame the business for charging, nor for PP for passing it along. But often there wouldn't have been an extra charge IME.

It's still rude to turn up expecting to include extra kids.

Thing is I'm not tight and would happily have added an extra if they'd just told me in advance! If it's the kind of party where food is free for all then I don't think I would mind so much

Surely common sense and communication are key here???

Family friend with several kids the same ages as yours? Venue that doesnt charge per person e.g. village hall? In all likelihood its fine to bring a younger child. Manyparents make it clear in the invitation, or you can ask. Tranpolining where a certain number of spaces have been paid for? No, it probably won'tbe ok and you shouldn't even ask unless it's really impossible for your child to attend otherwise.

I have 4 DC. As long as there is plenty of notice for parties it's not an issue to sort out. Certainly much easier for just dropping off parties, which our 7yo gets invited to. More challenging for our 3yos - I have taken the baby along to thise twice but a baby sleeping in a carrier is not really a bit deal. When she's a toddler we'll need toget a baby sitter for her if its a party where parents are expected to stay, or if my parents are availAble I might ask them to take the boys to the party.

Quite simply, if you have more than one child you need to make appropriate arrangements. Or if you can't (single motherwith little support for example) then you need to communcate with people. Sometimes this will mean asking if another child can attend (I've always welcomed extras, the more the merrier!) And sometimes that will mean explaining to your child that they can't attend the party on this occasion as you don't have a bay sitter so you're going to e.g. all go to the park togetherand feed the ducks instead.

It is unreasonable to expect other to make exceptions for you becauseof the number of children you have chosen to have.

One of the parents of my kids school friend dropped her dd who was invited and her sibling. If she had come and spoke to me it wouldn’t have bothered me at all, but she just dropped them at the door, I didn’t even see the mother until she came to collect them. The party we had you pay per child, so to expect someone to pay for another one of your children who isn’t invited without asking is just rude.

If I had the space I wouldn't mind siblings tagging along if needed because of lack of childcare, but we often do parties at soft play where it's strictly max 30 kids allowed. Seeing as there are 30 children in the class, I'll already have had to not invite other friends and family who I personally think should take priority over siblings my child doesn't even know 🙃 Basically, I have a space issue rather than a cost issue with it.

I agree that it is largely a space issue - in a party at home the birthday child has also probably been asked to select their best friends to invite due to limited space, so if there were to be spare capacity they would rather invite their 7th closest friend than their 6 closest plus a random sibling of one of those!

There was a boy in DD's class whose mother would do this,she'd turn up with all four kids and the dad would be there too.
So it wasn't like there was no one available to stay home with the uninvited siblings.

Nooo!!!

It’s the height of rudeness to assume you can bring your other children to a kids birthday party without checking with the host beforehand. These parents know it but just don’t care.

I’ve attended soft play parties where the entitled parents will bring younger siblings and don’t bother to parent them properly so they gatecrash the party games and grab the food meant for the invited kids.

If you’re looking after your toddler and keeping them away from the party action, that’s obviously fine, but many parents see it as an opportunity to zone out.

I held a few parties at home so numbers were definitely limited and all party bags accounted for. One mum turned up with an older and younger sibling who caused absolute chaos between them and needed my husband to intervene whilst I carried on looking after the invited kids. Not only that but she was the last bloody parent to leave too. 😳

I fondly remember the scandal in the group I was part of when the mother who always brought her younger child along to every party boldly stated on her child’s invitation that no siblings were allowed at hers 😂

Our eldest has just finished reception and I find this a lot. We have a younger one too, who goes to nursery with a few of the siblings from the eldests class. The last party just before we broke up for summer, I left the youngest at home with DH as there'd been no mention of an invite for them (totally understood this as it's a party for the reception child) but every single younger sibling was there! I couldn't work out if parents had asked to bring them, or if they'd been included in the invite. My youngest would've loved to have come as it was a few of their nursery friends, but I'd never have asked as it was a party for the older child. It does seem to be a thing though in this class that an invite seems to be for all of the children in the family as lots of siblings do seem to turn up.

That wouldn't bother me in the slightest.

To me yes, but we live in a very multicultural area of London and the mums are all very nice but we do constantly come across little differences. I suspect back home an invite for the child perhaps is expected to be for the whole family (she is from somewhere in Eastern Europe, I’ve never asked where though as worried the question would be rude!)