If you live in a middle class area do you ever hear your neighbours argue?

[Barrol]

Never heard a single neighbour argue and it makes me so self conscious when DH and I do. Not that we argue often. Dh and I raised our voices earlier in the evening as we had very different opinions on how to approach ab annoying task we are getting through. All the windows were wide open. So embarrassed. It was only for 5 minutes.

Is it because we live in a middle class area in the Home Counties?

Just for context our cul de sac is described as sought after on house listings. Most people are professionals around here. Do these people just have calm discussions?

Have lived here for 10 years. Never heard a peep.

I’m not sure if the area I live in would be classed as middle class, town is definitely mostly working class but I live on the nicer end. Anyway either way I’ve never heard my neighbours argue.

My mother was expert at quiet abuse. Nobody hears a Chinese burn, a twist of the arm, a punch to the side of your head or an iron an inch from your face.

Ex was from a MC family. He was worse if you made a sound, so I saved it for when he went for the 2 year old and got myself half strangled in the process. I suspect I went rather quiet then.

My old neighbours did, he was an alcoholic. Never heard anyone else and we don't argue ourselves

OP you sound like you’ve lived a very sheltered life 🤣

Referring to areas and people as working class and middle class like we’re all segregated is hilarious. And addressing the whole of the working class in this comment 🤣🤣

You do know that types of people can become richer or poorer and move to different areas and that all sorts of people can argue?

Just live your life and be free of others judgement.

Well I’m MC and we definitely argue, as do friends who live nearby.
not masses, but a bit
but our houses are pretty well insulated so I don’t think people outside can hear it (much).

that all said in our last house which was semi our neighbour admitted to hearing occasional arguments and constant baby crying (he was difficult) when I asked her. She was quite nice about it though.

Our former neighbours were proper posh (public school educated, owned horses and a grand piano etc) and they had some right vicious ding dongs. They're divorced now - he had an affair with the au pair and that was the final straw in a long line of infidelities. God knows what the women saw in him. He looked like the love child of Tweetie Pie and King Kong.

The rows would always be her berating him, on and on, then throwing things. Then eventually he'd flip and start bellowing back. Language was not then posh at all - cunt, fucking bitch etc. Awful.

Lived in middle class and council house estates and heard shouting and arguing in both in varying degrees. It just gets hidden more. Oh and domestic abuse cuts across all social classes by the way. (Not saying that's what you are doing or experiencing OP).

On reflection, I was as equally bothered if not more, by our neighbours on our last middle-class street than on the poor estate 20 years ago. Our most recent street before this move was constant gardening and property maintenance to a pathological level - there were people who would get the strimmer out daily, multiple people mowing the lawn every day, using the leaf blower for two stray leaves on the drive, DH called them the karcher club because they were all pressure washer obsessed. The neighbours one side of us never even made a whisper but they were sat in their garden 24/7, if it rained they were still there under the pergola, and they were very stiff unfriendly types, if you accidentally caught eyes outside on the driveways then they would never answer to good morning or anything. But yes, always there in the garden like silent assassins - never even heard them murmur to each other in an undertone. Spoiled the garden for us as they were always there listening on the other side of the fence. Sometimes the lady sneezed and I suspect she was mortified to have broken her silence. Also the place was a nightmare for yappy rat-dogs from all directions and ten thousand cat turds raining down each night.

Wow, I shout at my teens. I mean after calling them down for supper 8 times and they're still not replying or coming down but I can't make it up the stairs each time to get them, I will call up loudly and crossly. This happens at least 3 times a week. I had no idea this was such a rare thing. Don't posters here get exasperated? If you do, how do you handle it? We have a very respectful and harmonious household other than the occasional frustrated and loudish telling off (when nicely asking or telling doesn't work) but it's usually very quickly dealt with. I am sure our neighbour hear us when this happens (terraced).

All you non shouters, please share your tips for dealing with exasperating teens in the middle of a busy working week.

Middle class people fight too. Hold the front page:

”Darling, you overdid the Rioja last night…”

”But how else was I supposed to tolerate Triatram’s cello practice?”

“Oh do bog off to Lagrasse for the summer to let me focus on finishing my novel.”

WE live in terraced housing and most neighbours nod and smile. I'm horrified at what they must have heard coming from here, You can hear absolutely everything, everything. So I bet they enjoyed partner tellling me to F odd very loudly at the weekend.

I grew up on a south London council estate. Lots of shouting and swearing and night time ruckus. Usually from the same families (ours included). I live in a street of nice terraces now and no fighting is ever heard, so I don’t think it’s to do with proximity. Our street is what I’d describe as ‘professional’ rather than a particular class.

we have a small social housing estate at the end of the street. 90% of the residents are lovely, a mix of retirees and working. 10% really bring it down for everyone. Shouting, drug dealers arriving at all hours, screaming at the kids, litter everywhere, mattresses dumped in hedges, ambulances, police, carers driving at about 60mph in a 20mph street. The kids just toss their rubbish into our gardens and onto the street. It’s depressing. I lived on an estate in France which was a mix of social and private accommodation and didn’t have any of these problems, everyone mixed in nicely. Maybe I was lucky.

A small subset of arseholes can bring things down for everyone.

I guess I live somewhere 'middle class'. We have lots of Cypriot/ Turkish neighbours....possibly pinpointing my general location there...nevermind. The arguing if it does happen is just nicer to listen to! Nextdoor the husband is meak mild teddy bear who is a bit of a celeb in the community. His wife is convinced he is having affairs. We know this as another neighbour translates and I have been known to use Google translate in the garden!

Guy down the way, used to have lots of heated work calls in Covid. The way he spoke did make me laugh.

Affair lady had a blazing row with teenage daughter throwing all her clothes out the window and a guy turned up once screaming along the lines of 'don't let your son come anywhere near my daughter again'. Makes me laugh as she is a bit of a Hyacinth Bucket.

Neighbours otherside are Deaf, children can hear. We are very friendly and we have a gate for the kids/ dogs to free flow between the houses. The kids will be screaming, getting very giddy. I can hear this. They send my son back claiming how well behaved he is! They beat me in the shouting in the morning. Our kids are youngest in this area of the street. So we probably contribute more noise.

I had the front door open one morning shouting for my son to hurry up/ being a bit of a she devil. You know the 7000th time you have ask about shoes. Guy over the road heard and just shouted out 'they can be little buggers sometimes can't they?'.

There is a couple near me that regularly have bust ups to the point the police have been called and social services involved. They bought the house prior to covid ut just seem insanely unhappy together and often roar and scream outside their homes in front of their kids. This is a very quiet 'leafy' type place so it is very obvious and they are as middle class as you come they just dont seem to give a shit that they are a disgrace. Poor kids though witnessing it.

i don't object to being called WC. I do object to the OP calling WC people 'lower class' though.

Love this. The pic helps me see what we are dealing with!

You need to just stop digging you’re making it worse 🙈

People of all 'classes' argue.
Some folk just have bigger houses/more space between houses/thicker walls.

I remember going on euro camp holidays to France as a teen, all very middle class with wall to wall (canvas of course) teachers and social workers. You could hear everything. No shouting, but my God, I’ve never heard the word “darling” snarled more contemptuously than on those holidays.

I suppose our area might be called middle class (we don't really talk in terms of class in NI, but we live in a quiet, suburban road) DP and I do argue. The problem is, when we have a disagreement, his voice gets louder almost immediately. He says it isn't loud, but it bloody well is. Our usually very quiet and pleasant neighbours have a stonking row about once every 3 or 4 months. Proper yelling, doors slamming etc. Our houses are semi detached, so perhaps if we lived in one of the detached properties further along the road, we wouldn't hear a thing😆

I love this, @Lwrenn. I don’t think you’ve anything to cringe about: you sound kind, brave and willing to put yourself out for a woman you don’t know - you sound like the best sort of feminist.

Really?

What an obnoxious thread.

After discovering yesterday I'm surrounded by social housing, I don't feel I can talk but we haven't really heard shouting, not really. Only really when a child is being unbelievably naughty and you can hear the parent finally snap, otherwise, no.

I bet you never see them carrying their shopping in either but they definitely do it!

Sounds about right for the public school educated. Especially the language. I fear people have the wrong idea sometimes and get an awful shock when they discover otherwise!