To have a 'cut-off' for breakfast

[DominiqueBernard]

Last night, the DC (12 and 11) went to bed at 9pm to read then lights out at 9.30pm as usual at weekends. We had said we would go to Mass this morning at 9.30am.

At 9am DS11, DH and I were all awake and had eaten breakfast and got dressed. DD12 was still asleep so we decided not to wake her and we went to Mass at 9.20am, leaving her a note. We got back at about 10.45am and she was still asleep. She woke up at 11.45am. She came into the kitchen where DH, DS and I were preparing lunch. We had cleared away her breakfast place to make room (our kitchen diner is small). She helped herself to a glass of juice and then DH said, lunch is at 12.30pm, implying that she could wait until then to eat. I agreed with DH and still do.

However, I wonder if others might say we were being mean?

If it's relevant, we come from a culture where it's very unusual to eat between meals.

I agree, I'm not clear what this is really all about and to be honest, I think I'd be more concerned about my 12 year old daughter sleeping through from 9.30pm until 11.45am than what she had to eat when she finally woke up.
The no eating between meals culture is clearly French. On the other hand, meal-times are different in France, children will often have an early breakfast, a 3 course meal in school for lunch at midday, a "gouter" of bread and chocolate when they get home from school between 4 and 5, and a family supper at around 7 -7.30pm. Or that's what it was like when I taught in a French school aeons ago, and then again later when my daughter was at a French school. I'm racking my brains trying to remember what happened at the morning break, I think they probably had some fruit then, but I'm not sure.

Wh? Skip a family meal that's been cooked all for the sake of waiting half hour. How rude.

If it was a case of everyone making their own lunch and she preferred breakfast then fair enough

When my kids were young I was pretty easy going about mealtimes ( except all food had to be eaten at the table) except for a couple of times a week when a family meal was cooked. They were expected to be there and not having stuffed themselves half hour before

OP responds just to my post about whether the sermon had been about Jesus and feeding the 5000 and then ignores practically every other post.

Weird

Totally.
It's even a weird post in the first place.

We don't know was the DD hungry, was she hungry for Frosties but was she hungry for a big meal 45mins after getting up.

I have to assume since it was going to be ready in 45min, that it was some sort of Sunday Roast. I don't know that I could face a roast dinner for breakfast.

OK 12.30 is lunch time on the clock but the DDs tummy doesn't tell the time. So to her it would have been break-fast as in breaking the overnight fast!!

I have my doubts. I was at mass yesterday and that wasn't the gospel.

Yes, imagine roast beef and Yorkshire puddings 45 minutes after waking up 🤢

Excuse my ignorance of the workings of the Catholic church - but do they have the same sermon all over the country on the same Sunday? - I always assumed each preast sorted their own out. Other than the obvious like you do Christmas stuff at Christmas, Easter stuff at Easter.

Mass yesterday in England and Wales had a Gospel reading from just before the feeding of the 5000. Maybe in France or wherever the OP is they carried on.

The newsletter mentioned the loaves and fishes so that we knew where we were in the Gospel - and if I'd only read that, I would have thought it was the Gospel reading itself (because I don't really listen, just daydream).

So I'm confident OP actually went! Who are the doubters - her Mammies?

There's a difference between the Mass readings (which include the Gospel) and the sermon. The Mass readings are the same all over the country (I'm not sure about the world, though I would imagine so, less lapsed Catholics than I would know better), but each priest writes their own sermon, I think, though it will be based on the Gospel of the day, to the best of my knowledge.
Yesterday's Mass readings in the UK did not include the feeding of the 5,000, (see: www.catholicgallery.org/mass-reading/210724/) though for all we know, @DominiqueBernard's priest might have taken it as the theme for his sermon, though I think she was probably joking about it.
Oh, I'm sorry, I've just seen Father Ted's reply and I bow to the superior knowledge of someone who actually attended Mass yesterday!

Why didn't you wake her up when the rest of you were getting up? The eating times aren't the problem here, it's the fact you left a child sleeping alone in the house without letting them know you were leaving. Very strange.

"her breakfast place" - never heard of anyone laying the table for breakfast. you sound very rigid. I would have suggest she have a piece of fruit then wait til lunch.

I was brought up on that. (French father.) Table laid for all three meals of the day, everyone sitting in their designated place, each with their own serviette, for every meal.

I ( or more likely one of the children)set the table for breakfast. It’s just bowl, spoon, glass, side plate and knife. If they don’t eat breakfast (rarely) then it’s put away. It’s because it’s a help yourself meal had as you wake up and wander through in the holidays. Cereal and some pastries or muffins plus some fruit.

You are right, I am an Atheist but I am currently & previously have worked in many Catholic schools, so maybe once upon a time it was a requirement but like some of the more inconvenient rules the other hard & fast rules of Catholicism they get left by the wayside eventually

?? Eat lunch in her room?! Thats horrible! Id never have my child sit in their bedroom to eat lunch..its so scummy. And anti social. And just quite sad. Especially as shes been in that room for what appears to have been a 15 hour stretch!
Meal times are family events, you sit round and chat and laugh and eat something together at the time its been cooked.
Id have enquired whether she was ill, as 15 hours of sleep is excessive at any age and told her that we would be having a nice lunch really soon. Id prbably advise her to have a cup of tea, a shower and get dressed, by which point lunch would be on the table. But if she took a banana or a cereal bar or pwhatever i wouldnt grab it off her!

I do - it drives me nuts but sometimes they are pleasant to each other if we give up now we’ll lose the habit forever

what makes you “confident” out of interest?

I have a cut off time! Breakfast is over and the kitchen left clear at 10:00 so that lunch can be prepped and cooked. Coffee/tea and biscuits or some fruit is fine after that, but not sitting at the table eating cereal or making and spreading toast. If it's a day when it's just DH and me, we might not have 'proper' meals, just something late morning and something early evening, but when I'm cooking it's everyone out by 10:00. I don't think you were being harsh at all!

Now I'm waiting for all the rude comments to start......

I very much aspire to having strict mealtimes but sadly fall short. I admire the OP for having standards!

i’m not sure either way

what intrigues me is that the OP posts

and then drops in just to confirm the sermon

and then drops back again, once again to confirm the sermon

and then shuffles off

What the heck are you making for lunch that takes from 10am to lunch time?

In my head lunch is toast or a sandwich 🥪 🤔

So you have family staying with you and your husband

you would actually refuse entry to a grown assed adult who fancied a slice of toast and a coffee at 10.15am?

@courgettes4eva yes I would! All my family know the rules. I don't want anyone stuffing themselves full of toast when I'm slaving over a hot stove to cook for everyone, and I definitely don't want anyone getting in my way. The coffee station is down one end of the kitchen so they can grab some coffee if they want, and they know where the biscuits are.

Bring it on - you haters. I know I'm right.

You don’t have overnight visitors very often do you?

when my two stay (both lead very busy lives i. london), i love them having a long lie in and then meandering in whilst in cooking sunday lunch for a coffee and cereal whilst we chat.

I can’t imagine telling them to get out and wait for 3 hours until lunch