To be annoyed that I get glared at for having a blue badge

[Sparklebelle1024]

I try not to let it bother me but I’m young ( 35) and I have a blue badge because I have a few health problems which put me into the category of disabled and entitle me to pip and a blue badge. I do work (only part time as that’s a struggle but I do it for my own mental health but I think even that might have to go soon but I’m trying to last as long as I can) and almost every time I pull my car into the disabled spaces I get dirty looks and “badge checked” by the older generation and it’s ALWAYS older people !! It’s like younger folk can’t have disabilities!! Yet I can literally go from being okayish one day to hospitalised the next (I have a very understanding manager) and my car is a lifeline. I do try to brush it off but today I had a run in with an older man and he asked to see the photo on my badge to prove it was mine, I obviously told him he’s not entitled to that information and it’s not an elderly badge it’s a disabled badge and I cried when I was driving home.
it’s not fair…. I’m sick of being judged because I’m not “old” and don’t “look disabled” whatever that should look like. I know it shouldn’t bother me but it really genuinely does. So AIBU to be annoyed at being judged by the older generation because I use a badge I’m legally entitled to??

This idea that seems to be ingrained in some people, regarding young people, and disability needs a public awareness programme imo. Just to get it into the public's consciousness. I know there is more awareness of hidden disabilities, but there needs to be more work done.

You don't actually need to say anything.

If you have a blue badge you can park there. If you don't, you can't. So if you are parking there with a blue badge, people should mind their beeswax - if you don't have a blue badge displayed, they can tell the next traffic warden they see.

Nobody needs to explain anything.

How does your mother know that the user is "not entitled to it"?

If there's no badge there, they may have forgotten it.

This. People are not owed an explanation. no matter how politely they ask.

.

Wow, I didn’t expect this thread to go like this
my point is with my disability etc I really don’t need extra stress … it’s not exactly easy day to day and I could do without the judgements but I guess I need to toughen up.

I park outside of the gym in my cute little pink car and slap my blue badge on the dashboard with no fucks given. Drives a certain demographic mad ☺️

But you shouldn't have to. It's unfair and feels like bullying to me.

Really? Because your car is pink??

No you shouldn't toughen up. This isn't your problem it's theirs and it's unfair that it impacts you. I think it should be considered a hate crime personally.

Unfortunately given the number of people who lie about medical conditions or disability, it creates a climate of suspicion around those who are genuine. Add to that the normalisation of lying in general, that does not help.

And the blue badge doesn't match the pink, maybe ?

😁

So because of fraud in the disability benefits system that the DWP calls a 'non-issue' due to it being so rare, OP has to put up with harassment? What would she have to put up with if it was a genuine issue and the numbers were at all significant!

You shouldn’t have to answer to people so I would just ignore them.
i think the problem is that years ago, to be eligible for a blue badge it was for people who would normally struggle to do their day to day shopping and would struggle to get in and out of a car due to being infirm so needed the wider spaces.

It appears now anyone can have one if you are classed as having a disability.
My mother in law has a blue badge but she certainly doesn’t need one. She suffers with fibromyalgia and whilst it can be debilitating to some people who struggle daily with this for her it certainly isnt. She applied for one because her friend managed to get one.

My own father on the other hand was diagnosed with MS since early 90’s. He has held down a full time job and even when he retired he still didn’t claim one as he felt that as he was able to get in and out of a car he wouldn’t be entitled. He claimed for his first blue badge following Covid.

I’m surprised that this level of abuse is happening towards disabled drivers. Confrontation, verbal abuse and assault?

I’ve never seen this sort of attitude in public, although where I live disabled parking spaces are plentiful.
Most people don’t seem to care less who parks in them.

And it’s mainly other disabled people (blue badge holders) who feel the need to police spaces with an aggressive attitude?

You've hit the nail on the head with "where I live disabled parking spaces are plentiful."
I live somewhere where everyone is competing for often scarce resources and there's a lot of people of all backgrounds and incomes living side by side.
When things go wrong, who is from where and what they should be entitled to according to the other, along with assumptions about who's working, where someone's from, and where they sit in peoples imagined hierarchies,
tend to come out fast and nastily.

The majority of people policing disabled badge holders aggressively in supermarket car parks are those trying to find a space - either disabled drivers or their friends or relatives, or they are able bodied people walking up the central 'aisle' to the store, who are miffed they have had to park further away and are now passing people 'who are getting something they are not.' (I base that assumption on the things they come out with.)

The further away from where I live I drive out to, the less frequent and milder the issues are generally, though if I'm transferring in and out of a van to or from my wheelchair, it happens everywhere. People have a huge problem with disabled WC trades, in their minds you can't be both.

Being a disabled woman working in a perceived male way attracts trouble most places, where as doing the same in a car is apparently more acceptable in many.

Not toughen up but just ignore people. You do not owe people engagement and especially not if they are nosy sanctimonious twits.

This is not true. You need medical evidence to get a blue badge. Are you saying GPs and consultants are routinely colluding in fraud? That's quite an accusation.

I'm sick of this attitude nowadays:

'Anyone can get a blue badge'

Anyone can get a community psychiatric nurse

Anyone can get PIP

Etc, etc.....

NO THEY CAN'T!!

It's a fight and struggle to get each one.
I feel a lot of it comes down to jealousy.
Other people are getting something which they can't have.
It's simple jealousy.

I do have a pink cover for it!

There’s something about a woman not looking disabled enough in gym kit with a fun car that isn’t popular.

Its simple jealousy

That strikes me as laughable really. Jealous of a disabled person on benefits? Are people really that small minded and petty? How depressing!

I got the impression from this thread that it’s blue badge holders who are challenging each other and getting all territorial about their spaces and wanting to police them.

Unless you’re a blue badge holder yourself, you wouldn’t know about asking to see the photo on it or look at the back etc. I don’t know anything about blue badges or the entitlements that would give a driver.

Although you’ve encountered a couple of busy bodies op, please don’t assume everyone is glaring at you.
I refuse to believe that the majority of people are arseholes. Just the odd few 😂

Yes, jealousy.

I can park just about anywhere.
Jealous.

I can go on holiday.
Jealous.

I can wear nice clothes and make up, look quite "normal"
Jealous.

I don't have to work, can have a lie in.
Jealous.

Can drive in a new car paid from mobility benefit.
Jealous.

They never see the really bad, difficult, painful side of my life.
Therefore you get jealousy.

Perhaps the council parking symbol for disabled bays need to change. It’s a symbol of a wheelchair and some dimwits might be taking that literally?

Sorry to hear that @Petitchat . I don’t envy you at all x

Its simple jealousy

That strikes me as laughable really. Jealous of a disabled person on benefits? Are people really that small minded and petty? How depressing!

The only benefits 'I'm on' is PIP which is there to help me offset additional costs in working and studying. One of the accusations I've had (more than once) is that I'm 'taking other peoples jobs.' When you challenge this the response is 'you are entitled to benefits so should be on them, other people aren't able to get them and need the work you're taking.'' If I point out I'm self employed it mollifies them a little, but they still feel I'm taking something that isn't 'rightfully mine.'

The people policing spaces often claim to be relatives, friends or neighbors of blue badge holders or 'genuinely disabled' themselves, with or without their own badge.
No it's absolutely not the majority of people, but the arseholes group range from being petty irritants to downright dangerous.

Given that those of us in wheelchairs suffer it too, I suspect changing the symbol will just further widen the group of able bodied who already feel free to take the spaces.