To ask my husband not to nap while I'm working

[LookAtThatCritter]

I work from home and unfortunately the only space that we have available for my work station is in our bedroom. I know - it's a pain, but it is what it is. We don't have space for it in the living room/kitchen, and I need a room with a door that shuts anyway because I have a lot of client meetings & work with financials.

I just need the space during normal working hours, so if I work unreasonably early or late I'm totally fine with having someone else in the room and I try to be really quiet. But during normal working hours, I like to try and separate my work from home so I don't get distracted and can stay productive.

Sometimes my husband will wander in during the work day and start napping in the bed (which is what my desk faces). I find this really annoying and distracting, but I don't know if I'm being unreasonable or if this is okay. He only works part time right now and no night shifts or anything like that. It's not even the napping that's annoying me - but we have a sofa in the living room he could use. I just don't want someone sleeping in the same room I'm working.

Am I being a bitch, or am I justified to ask him to stop?? 😫

Also on the fence with this. Sounds like you are better just going into the office, or using one of those work spaces that you can book day by day. I’d be annoyed to be locked out of my own bedroom all day because it’s been turned into an office.

On the other hand, napping in general annoys me! Go get something done! 🙈

Why is he napping during the day? Why is he working only part time? Hasn't he anything productive to do?

That would drive me insane. Sheer bone idleness

It’s working time and the part time person wants to sleep in the same room? Good grief that’s incredibly annoying. I would find it disrespectful.

Well yes, when I'm on Teams sometimes a colleague will have someone hoovering in the background. They're allowed to live their lives too.

Oh no, he wouldn't do that! He's generally walking through the living room to get a drink, empty the washing machine or something like that. When I first started WFH at the beginning of the pandemic the poor bloke used to ask for permission to come into the living room. In the end my boss, who knows us both, said she wanted to see him walk through and saying hello next time it was her and I on the phone.

Sometimes it can be hard to find a happy medium between home and work space. I'm being made redundant in a couple of months and so will have to look for a job next year. Part of me wants something where I'm in the office most of the time so home is home again.

If he's only working part-time wtf does he need a nap? He's being a twat.

It’s also her office. He’s out of order and can use the sofa.

I've already said multiple times why I can't work anywhere else. We don't have the space. My computer set up isn't portable and I need multiple screens. And actually the bedroom doesn't get used during the day other than this occasional nap issue. If I worked elsewhere in our (small) house, I would have to worry about noises from him/the toddler/the dogs going into the kitchen, being in the lounge, bathroom, watching the TV etc. I'm staying out of the way and making sure he has free access to as much of the house as possible without having to be suddenly quiet because I'm getting a call or having a meeting etc.

My company doesn't have an office building - it's entirely remote. And everyone is spread out over the country.

If I took a job locally instead of this remote job, I would lose at least 50% of my salary. As explained previously (but lots of commenters seem to have missed) - this company is entirely remote. There are no co working spaces. I cannot go and work from a coffee shop or library. Those are not appropriate spaces to take multiple screens and have calls discussing clients in depth financial information. It is literally work this job (which I love, btw) or lose a lot of money + commuting costs + all the other costs that come from working outside the home. All for the benefit of someone napping in the bed instead of the sofa 😂

We'll get a bigger house eventually. But we have to deal with what we have right now.

He must get tired working part time (not sure if has medical issues) and this in turn means he has to sleep or nap. Tho sofa?? Yeh YANBA you are working from a bedroom its hardly ideal. Tho him lying flat out asleep hardly a good look on zoom meetings.

@LookAtThatCritter

Youre being completely over dramatic with your last posts, all for the sake of a man ….having a nap …..in his own bed.
How on earth would you cope in an actual office. I suspect by posting to MN all about it.

My DH works from home in the bedroom, I'm term time so off for the summer. I get up and out the room and am reluctant to even go back in the grab something. If I do, I'll peek in first to make sure he's not in a meeting or something and then very quickly and quietly grab it.

I'd consider going in and napping incredibly disrespectful.

How many part time working adults need a nap during the day?

You mean, like an office?

There are office spaces you can hire which have private rooms, screens, lockers you can leave your equipment in...

If companies wish to insist on privacy for workers then they need an office or to pay for employees to use private space. As it is ... I think most don't even pay for the fact WFH staff use their own electricity and water and gas extra to do the work...

I once worked a job for a company that contracted the work from another company. I worked from my company's office. When GDPR changed the contracting company said I would have to start going into their office for client protection.

I get that you are earning a lot more than him. And I suspect like a lot of people, some months are difficult to make ends meet so you need every penny that you earn. And in order to keep doing this you need total concentration and that’s hard to do with someone blowing 💤 next to you. Granted it’s not ideal for him but I think your needs are the priority on this one.

Are you choosing to wfh? The obvious answer is go into the office. You could also use a co working space or cafe etc. working from your bedroom is bad in a lot of ways. Colleagues and clients don’t want to see your bed. I wfh and I wouldn’t expect the people who live here to not be able to use the bedroom or kitchen.

However if you have no choice but to work from your bedroom he should respect that in working hours and nap elsewhere.

He sounds like a bum. Why does he want to fall asleep while you’re working. He should be on the sofa watching tv since he’s part time

But it's not just their bedroom it's her workspace.

It means that someone has to be there in case of an incident and ambulance needed .. you leave, my mate has to leave with you regardless of time 😊

Are you choosing to wfh? The obvious answer is go into the office. You could also use a co working space or cafe etc. working from your bedroom is bad in a lot of ways.

This is cancel the cheque all over again, from this and other posters.

The OP has explained many times that her company does not have an office. There is no office to go to. All employees work remotely.

Using a co-working space costs money and they're not rolling in it.

Her work is confidential and not at all appropriate to do in a cafe. Would you want someone discussing your financial situation on a call in a cafe?

She has spoken to her DH who didn't realise that it was causing her problems and immediately agreed to nap on the sofa.

Anything else I need to repeat?

I never napped until i hit 45…

You missed out that the DH is busy with the house and toddler when he's not doing his paid job. Because plenty of posters got as far as reading "part time working" and assumed he was a waste of space who spent all his spare time napping for no reason.

"In the end my boss, who knows us both, said she wanted to see him walk through and saying hello next time it was her and I on the phone."

A teacher I know says she's seen many of the fathers in their pants because they were walking around semi-dressed in the background.

Many of which are open plan these days so not confidential anyway.