Summer students disrespectful of my home.

[CleanCityBird]

Hi everyone,
ive 2 students staying with me, both 15 from France. They’re doing a 3 week language course.
Cleaning their room I found old stale sandwiches, partially rotted, yogurts, pastries. The thing is, apart from the yogurt. This isn’t the food I’ve prepared for them.Its someone else’s.
they’ve been here 2 weeks now, & all in all, they’re great kids. Up & out in the morning ( one has said she’s sick 2 out of 10days tho). They’re polite, sweet Girls.

Im annoyed that they left food to rot, it can cause all sort of problems. Im annoyed they have someone else’s food, and im annoyed because it’s disrespectful to my home.
I’ve cut them some slack because they are so young, taking more of a caring role, doing their laundry, cleaning their bathroom.
they’ll be home around 9ish tonight & I have to have a word with them.
i don’t want to upset them but I do want to get the message across that it’s not on.
I’m so annoyed I’m afraid I will over react with them. Any guidance from seasoned student host Mums might have would be greatly appreciated! ❤️

NRTFT SO I suppose someone has already suggested this, but in case no one has…

Explain to them that this is unacceptable. If they are “Homestay” students and the issue continues despite the initial warning, call their Homestay Coordinator at their course provider and ask for them to address the issue with the students directly, if the issues continue ask for the students to be removed. Most of the times the threat to be moved to an emergency short term host or to a host far from the school/friends is more than enough to bring them in line.

You posted a vile post on someone else's thread and have the audacity to say people are being horrible to you when you posted a thread saying/complaining about one thing - including calling them disrespectful in your title - made a shit joke that no one got because it sounded exactly in line with what you'd posted in seriousness and are now backtracking. Sounds like instant karma ironically

I worked for a language school for a long time and these kinds of gripes were fairly common. You could maybe just have a polite chat with them about the mess, or you could contact the Accommodation Manager in the school, who might be able to advise you or chat to their group leader (if they have one).

Mature ... :D

I usually am the one to say the MN bunch is sometimes ott but in this instance you sound like a 15 yo yourself. :D

Sorry don't get the fuss. Show them the bin, ask them to throw away left over food and done. They have a week left and will be out of your hair in no time.

This. Cut them some slack. They don't like your food, they're a bit bad with rubbish but they're only 15 and away from home.
They're not 25 year old lodgers.

At least you only have one more week, nothing too horrendous will happen in that time.
If you are meant to be in their room, then just mention that food needs to go in the bin or you’ll get mice/bugs.

If you aren’t meant to be in their room then I’m not sure how you bring it up. Tell them you’ll be hoovering the next day and hope they have a minor clean up?

You’re massively over reacting. Do you have children?

irritated about rotting food I can understand.

You however have ZERO right to restrict their diet or get mad about where they get food from or what they eat... are you always that controlling?

Tell them to put the food in the bin & remind them throughout the week.

Teenagers are well known for not keeping their rooms tidy. I wouldn’t entertain the idea of hosting students of this age again as it sounds like it’s causing you stress.

Did you not set some house rules when they got there. Ask them not to take food upstairs. Empty any rubbish out of their bag before taking it upstairs. I don't allow food in bedrooms it's. A brew maybe but never food.🤢🤮

They may have enjoyed and appreciated your food, still been hungry and gone to the supermarket. Teens can have big appetites.

My grandmother hosted foreign language students for years.

She had very strict rules, similar to when she had her own kids living with her.

Rooms had to be kept clean and tidy at all times. Beds had to be made every morning and bins emptied. She would check their rooms every morning when they left and pick them up on it as soon as they returned if they hadn’t done something. Food had to be eaten in the kitchen and nowhere else. Laundry had to be brought downstairs and separated on set days. They had a strict evening curfew.

She was also very kind, generous and warm towards them and most returned year after year.

She said it was important to have clearly laid out rules and expectations and not to waiver from them. Especially as there was often a language barrier and cultural differences.

This.

I've worked with international students for many years in this age group. This isn't worth a fuss and agree with previous posters as to how to deal with it. It is simple teenage thoughtlessness and a breezy reminder to use the bin will suffice.

Alternatively, ask the organiser of the summer school who is dealing with pastoral care / accommodation to have a word. They will have seen it all before. Trust me, there are a lot worse things you could be dealing with as a host mother!

What???
where? Where did you get the notion in your head I want to restrict their diet?
Im a laid back woman. Rotting food annoyed me. And I posted about that.
Headbangers have escalated this into me being a control freak, Nurse Rachett character.
They’re very settled, very happy. I take care of them like I did my own now grown up children.
id like to know how you got to me restricting their food?

This. I mean they can have a huge dinner and then be starving half an hour later. It’s bizarre but normal.

I still want to know what food you cook, I need some inspiration!

Poor kids, they must be counting the days until they go home, what a pleasant host you sound 😂

Stop moaning about the kind of food they eat, but do tell them to bin the leftovers and not leave it to rot in their bedroom.

I can't believe you are offended by "stranger's food" in your house, do you realise how ridiculous that sounds?

Whilst not religious myself, this seems quite apt.

Luke23:34
Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.”

I will say it again.
The kids having other food IS NO PROBLEM.
i MENTIONED IT. Cause I provide them 3 meals. Breakfast & 2 packed meals, lunch and dinner.
if they’re eating other food because they don’t like what I give them I thought it would be good to know so I can make changes.
That’s IT.

Mmmmmmm….did they know you were planning on cleaning their rooms? I suspect not. They may feel you have invaded their privacy.

" Im annoyed they have someone else’s food, and im annoyed because it’s disrespectful to my home. "

"I’m so annoyed I’m afraid I will over react with them. "

You are over-reacting. Do you actually have children of your own because you arent acting like it. And have you actually asked them what they like to eat? Of course trying different food is part of experiencing another culture but sometimes you also need to be considerate.

Your food is evidently not fabulouso, they’re not eating it. They’re actively seeking other food that they bring back
Offer them alternatives seeing they don’t like your food eg yoghurt,pastries,fruit. Just replicate what they obviously really want to eat

You are not laid back if you’re there looking at every piece of rubbish to work out if it’s your food or not!
Either they don’t like your food or you don’t give them enough and they have to buy more.

”The kids having other food IS NO PROBLEM.
i MENTIONED IT. ”

I’m annoyed they have someone else’s food.

Just remind them to use the bin. If you're going to get so worked up about them eating food you havent given them, perhaps hosting isn't for you.

OK - but you wrote in your OP - "Im annoyed they have someone else’s food," - which makes it sound that this an issue for you

If it's "NO PROBLEM" for them to have food other than what you provide, why on earth did you say in your OP, "Im annoyed they have someone else’s food, and im annoyed because it’s disrespectful to my home"? 🤔