Summer students disrespectful of my home.

[CleanCityBird]

Hi everyone,
ive 2 students staying with me, both 15 from France. They’re doing a 3 week language course.
Cleaning their room I found old stale sandwiches, partially rotted, yogurts, pastries. The thing is, apart from the yogurt. This isn’t the food I’ve prepared for them.Its someone else’s.
they’ve been here 2 weeks now, & all in all, they’re great kids. Up & out in the morning ( one has said she’s sick 2 out of 10days tho). They’re polite, sweet Girls.

Im annoyed that they left food to rot, it can cause all sort of problems. Im annoyed they have someone else’s food, and im annoyed because it’s disrespectful to my home.
I’ve cut them some slack because they are so young, taking more of a caring role, doing their laundry, cleaning their bathroom.
they’ll be home around 9ish tonight & I have to have a word with them.
i don’t want to upset them but I do want to get the message across that it’s not on.
I’m so annoyed I’m afraid I will over react with them. Any guidance from seasoned student host Mums might have would be greatly appreciated! ❤️

Ha. I remember being in France for 2 weeks as a summer student with a friend. 15 as well. We were homesick and did not get enough to eat so we went to buy pastries and sneaked them into our room to eat😊 I do think we threw everything the garbage in the bin though.. If I were you I would tell them nicely that you did some cleaning up and please throw leftover food etc in the bin. Stop. Don't say anything about them having food you haven't prepared! You don't know why they have it and frankly it's none of your business. You might be a great cook but 15-year olds are no experts on the matter. They probably miss their ratatouille and crème brûlé😉

I think it's fine to remind them to bin food and not leave it in their bedroom. I wouldn't make a huge deal out of it, though, it sounds like pretty standard thoughtless teen behaviour.

I think you're being controlling to complain about them having food other than the food you've given them, though.

I'm with the PPs. It's not a big deal if they're otherwise nice kids. Just remind them with a smile to put their food waste into the bin, or into your kitchen waste bin. No need to then give it another thought.

Just cheerfully say to them, "hey you guys, Let's make sure we throw out any food we have left over so we don't get bugs. Cool? Great! Good job!"

Don't make it a thing. Everything is already excruciating for teens and they're overseas in the house of a strange lady.

Next time round have the no food in bedroom rule from the start.
This time ask them to bin the rubbish - reminder of the bin. Then remind them that food waste plates/cups/bowls should be brought out promptly.
Leave it at that.
As PP has said food is a matter of taste. Have you asked them what they would like? Or asked them to cook with you - show you their favourite meal.

I'm expecting their parents to think they will come back with some new life skills as well as language ones. Maybe don't do all washing- educate them how to use the machine 🙂

The absolutely fabulous post was tongue in cheek, not to be taken seriously. As it’s such an outrageous thing to say I thought the fact that it was wit would be obvious.

I think as it's such a bizarre thing to be remotely bothered about to begin with, that 'wit' was easily believable

Fine to remind them to put uneaten food in the bin but really odd to be pissed off because they are having food from outside of your house.

Just be lucky that you didn't have the problem a friend of mine had after the departure of a German exchange student. A strange odour developed in the room and eventually it was discovered that there were 2 German salamis hidden under the bed - purchased in Germany before he came to the UK. It was unclear whether they had been meant as a "gift" or whether they were something for him to eat in the UK.

Err..?

Just a simple - girls can you pop any food rubbish in the bin please and not leave it your rooms - will suffice. Not sure why you want to make a huge uncomfortable drama out of it, or why you are policing what they chose to eat.

Host mum of 15 years here ... you're massively over reacting! You just need a breezy "please remember to put unwanted food in the bin" comment.

Your food is obviously quite shit. Step up your packed lunch game or quit whining.

Anyone quoting that I have a problem with them eating other food please calm down.
I have no problem with them eating other food. None. Nada.
I am not personally offended, or raging they mightn’t like my food. If you’re thinking that then you are wrong.
I mentioned it in case it was indicative of them swopping food out & not eating this either, and they might then not be eating anything. Which would NOT be good.

That is an opinion, not a fact, sorry to point out.

You can't prevent them swapping lunches. You can't even tell them off for swapping lunches. Just ask them to please bin food they don't want.

They obviously would feel awkward to say that to you they are only kids for goodness sake. What's wrong with them getting food somewhere else they arnt your prisoners. Just ask them nicely not to leave food In the room you really don't need to get so worked up over it.

Their behaviour is normal. Yours is not. It’s nasty to have started this thread about them and you are obviously projecting to blame them.

No, not with the comments in your OP indicating the clear preoccupation with the non-issue of 'someone else's food'.

Em I haven’t reacted at all yet. I haven’t even spoken to them.
God this bunch of mothers on here just want to jump on people and criticise. The odd exception but in general you’re an awful bunch.

OP, I got it, tongue-in-cheek, check!

You've posted on AIBU. That makes you guilty of something no matter what you say... not many here do nuance or even basic comprehension.

Well that's definitely not how your original post reads to other people !!!!!! You were very annoyed they ate other food

Just cheerfully say to them, "hey you guys, Let's make sure we throw out any food we have left over so we don't get bugs. Cool? Great! Good job!"

Although the general sentiment is good, this may confuse them and they’ll think they’ve landed up in the USA by mistake!

Just tell them not to keep food in their rooms and they need to make sure lunch boxes etc. are emptied in the kitchen bin, but don't make a big deal of it.

I had a teen relative stay and after she left I discovered multiple empty biscuit and chocolate wrappers in her room and crumbs everywhere. I felt quite bad that either she had an eating disorder or didn't like what we were feeding her ( she was a very polite vegetarian who didn't like vegetables so it was tricky).

You are presumably getting paid money to host these girls, so don't take it personally.

I think it is fairly common, don't take it personally, I have had students often blatantly ignoring the no-food-in-bedroom rule I implemented after we had the first lot, who left rubbish including food in the drawers (I never cleared drawers for any more students after that but let them live out of the suitcases). Have a calm word with them and also let the family person from the language school know. Also ask them what they like to eat and get them to make their own sandwiches them food shopping with you if you are happy for them to choose stuff. Be patient. Good luck!

You also said I'm so annoyed I'm afraid I will overact with them. You would be VERY wrong to do this. They are very young. Stop and think.

OP, I would just ask the kindly NOT to leave food to rot in their room.
THEN ask them are there any other items you can get for them to eat for lunches etc.

Rotting food is not on in rooms.
Just ask them not to do it.