Slapped in the face with a tortilla wrap.

[SaphiraBlue]

Title says it all really.

Backstory:

Just cooked tea for the family (though not myself as I wasn’t hungry)

DP took his time coming to the table, which was slightly annoying but is what it is.

He sat down and asked for sauces, I looked at him and told him where they were (as in get them yourself)

He looks at me with mock puppy dog eyes and says “but I have a bad foot and I’ve been working on your house all day”

1. He does have a bad foot after he impaled it on two rusty nails while building a fence at my house.
2. He’s been plastering walls all day at my house

The house we live in is in his name so I’ve recently bought my own as an investment/security for myself. He has been incredibly helpful with doing up the property so I got up and got him the condiments…. ….only to be slapped in the face with a tortilla wrap!

He thought it was funny, DSS thought it was funny (my DS still hadn’t made it downstairs to the table at this point) and when I was clearly unamused DP’s response was “It’s a thing!!” And tried to justify himself by saying it’s something trending online. I did pick up his drink and threaten to throw it over him but stopped as I didn’t want to be the one to clear up the mess after - it feel guilty for it as I undoubtedly would.

So
AIBU - lighten up it’s just a joke
AINBU - Cheeky (Expletive) can make his own food in future.

Whilst he is asleep tonight, squirt squirty cream (or if you don’t have any) then use tomato ketchup or brown sauce and squirt it in the palm of his hand then tickle his nose or forehead until he rubs his hands on his face!

I don't think it's particularly funny but I wouldn't mind cooking for & getting sauces for someone who had been working on my house all day tbh.

And make sure you have the camera ready for a pic 😂

This!

He sounds like a twat. I would not be impressed.

Me too

I knew a man who was slapped with a naan bread during some horseplay and had a really nasty rash for about a week. I’m not sure if it was plain or garlic.

Laugh it off...plan long term revenge.

Is he violent in any other ways?

You need to phone the police. This is assault.

surprised so many people think it's hilarious tbh! Not my kind of humour but each to their own

Honestly? Like really?

I'm hoping you are joking.

Imagine that call

What is okay to slap someone with and what isn’t?

Tortilla, yes ✅
Brick, no ❌

He'd be wearing the sauces he wanted.

It's only funny if the person being hit finds it funny.

being hit in the face with anything is not funny

So he assaulted you?

I can hear my gran now getting furious about the idea of playing with food.

I actually just snorted tea when I read this

@SaphiraBlue how would he have reacted if you slapped him with something

I agree. Is "it's an online trend" the new "it's just banter"?

Online trend or not, I'd not want to be with a man who was stupid enough to do that to his partner.

Yes, it's not in any of my feeds at all.

And I agree that the person who gets to determine whether the joke was funny is the person who was subjected to it/made the butt of it. Which is the OP. Not her DP, and not randoms on MN.

"Hello officer I was assaulted with a tortilla wrap"

"This is a pisstake yes? Stop wasting police time"

DS16 and I sometimes slap each other's cheek with a slice of ham when we're making pizza. We both end up crying with laughter - but that's because we both think it's funny. Your DH needs to remember it's only funny if everyone's laughing.