Schoolgirls spiked my daughter’s drink with laxatives.

[Halfordscarpark]

This is more of a WWYD I guess.

My daughter has been bullied recently at school, some physical, some verbal and this week the bullies poured laxatives into her water bottle at lunchtime and I had to leave work to collect her.

I’ve not heard anything more from the school or the parents and the children are still in school.

I’m interested to hear what you think and what you would do in this situation as this is not acceptable.

I'd report to the police and inform the school that my child won't step foot there until her safety is assured (e.g.by kicking the bullies out).

This is absolutely disgusting. You need to report it to the police, you can not let them get away with this. It doesn’t matter if you cause a scene, they could have seriously harmed your DD. If they are doing this at 13 what will they be like at 16.

I would seriously consider moving her to another school if they don’t take this seriously.

Police - right now . Then contact the school on Monday morning to ascertain what they plan to do to keep your child safe.

Your daughter is being targeted and she really needs to know that you’ve got her back. You don’t want her to be chewing over this ten+ years from now and wondering why you didn’t react in a robust way to protect her.

This is one of the most disturbing things I’ve read on here. Your poor daughter. Please call the police. Those children should be permanently excluded for this vile assault and humiliation of your daughter

all involved need taking through the young offenders courts and a young offenders sentence

What do you mean by "a young offenders sentence"? If you mean a custodial sentence then honestly that is vanishingly unlikely. It is highly unlikely the Police will take any action at all beyond interviewing the girls involved, maybe not even that. IME (many years working with children including young people who have been subject to and committed assaults) where an assault happens on school property the response from the Police 99% of the time is "we're happy to let the School deal with this". Even if they did investigate, it is very unlikely that the CPS would prosecute. The chances of something like this actually getting to court are slim to none.

probably excluding those involved to a more secure environment

What do you mean "a more secure environment"? Even if a school decide to permanently exclude a child (which is not straightforward and requires a lot of evidence) that doesn't give them licence to have the child locked up!

The children's parents need investigating too because if a ten year old doesn't know that playing with medication is dangerous and isn't being prevented from having access to medication, they are at risk

Investigated by who? The Police? Social services? If the child had gotten hold of their parents stash of class A's and brought them into school then yes, fair enough, that absolutely would warrant an assessment by children's services. But since most parents don't keep their laxatives under lock and key, they can hardly be accused of parental neglect. Personally, I've never thought to sit my children down and educate them about the specific dangers of poisoning their classmates with over the counter medications, so does that mean they are at risk and I should be "investigated"?

What happened to OP's DD was disgraceful, the response from school seems inadequate, so she has every right to follow the school complaints process. But some of the responses on this thread are way over the top with posters giving advice based on how they think systems and processes around exclusion, criminal justice and safeguarding should work, with very little understanding of how they actually work in practice.

As others have mentioned, this is very serious and police involvement is absolutely necessary. These girls are dangerous. Don't forget that one of Brianna Ghey's killers was moved to Brianna's school after spiking a younger child at her previous school.

Scarlett Jenkinson was moved to Brianna Ghey's school after spiking younger girl www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-68153179

My daughter was knocked unconscious in school. Police wouldn't touch it. It was absolutely assault. I hope you get better for your DD as this is also assault.

I want to see bullies get a criminal record to limit what they can do for work in the future. I truly do.

Exactly. Never mind a scene I would be causing a whole fucking theatrical production.

Police - administering a noxious substance is not a joke.

Your poor girl. I really hope she's OK. I'd call the police and inform the school of that on Monday and demand a meeting. Hope she recovers, and hope you're ok, absolutely heartbreaking to have your baby treated that way, what awful children

Please contact the police. These bullies need to learn a lesson. If you do nothing, next time they will pour a bleach into someone else's drink. Nip it in the bud.

I don’t want to cause a scene but at the same time I can’t afford to let these kids get away with such harmful behaviour.

OP, this is WAY beyond causing a scene!! For your daughter's sake start acting like a mother and do something to protect her! Show her you've got her back, report these bullies and make a massive fuss at the school!!

that's just terrible honestly

@Halfordscarpark I want an update that says Police have taken a statement. Have you reported as many have suggested? It's one of few ways these girls, their parents and the school will take rmthis seriously. And your daughter needs to know you fight her corner. Report to the police!

Am sorry your daughter has faced this.

I would be kicking off beyond belief. HeadTeacher, Governors, Police - the works.

There is clear evidence and school have it.

The way you describe it is also worse. Not only is it terrible to sneak it in someone’s drink, but to then force someone to drink it in front of them should be ringing very serious alarm bells for school. Firstly your DD but secondly escalation of abuse as they’re clearly desensitised.

So sorry OP. Get mad.

It really isn't.

Neglect is persistent failure to meet a child's basic needs.

If there was evidence that a child was repeatedly, persistently accessing and misusing dangerous substances within the home then that would be a different matter. But the idea that parents are guilty of neglect for not having the foresight to lock away any item that cannot be legally purchased by a child is nonsense. I have children and I there is alcohol in my house that is not stored in a lockable container, this does not mean I am guilty of neglect. However, if my children took the alcohol to school and someone consumed it, placing them at risk of harm, and then I continued to leave alcohol in a place that was accessible to them that could be viewed as neglectful.

What those girls did to OP's DD was awful and I agree the Police should be informed but speculating that the perpetrators are victims of neglect is not rational or helpful.

The first alder within the school should have contacted health at the time of the incident because laxatives can cause a racing heart (brief, doesn't often cause lasting issues) as it manages all the bowel changes.

Your child could have an unknown heart condition and your child could have come to very serious difficulties. The school is negligent in providing urgent care for your child if they did not inform health as they act on the behalf of the parent during the time of school.

Health and safety first then working out who is at fault next should have been the schools priority/duty.

I would then contact the police and a solicitor because your child has been abused on school property and the adults that were meant to protect her, failed.

This is so awful.

I would go to the police now.

Then write an email to the head teacher, copying head of year and form teacher plus governors.

Give a factual account of what happened, how long the bullying has been going on and your previous contact with the school about this, including their lack of response to this incident.

Find the school’s bullying and safeguarding details on their website so you can refer to these. Make sure you use the word bullying, and targeting, and explain it is repeated, and ongoing.

Ask them how they plan to keep your DD safe at school. Give them a deadline to respond.

I would also want to know that they have contacted the parents of these scumbags, although they are unlikely tell you about punishments.

If they don’t respond quickly or fail to do anything then go to the local authority, Report report report. And find a new school. Wishing you good luck.

@Halfordscarpark your DD is unfortunately unlikely to forget this trauma. Your response to it will play an important role in how she processes this and values herself given the humiliation she has experienced. You have been given some excellent advice about liaising with the police and communication with school, the governors and if necessary your MP. Don’t be afraid to kick up a fuss to protect your daughter’s wellbeing now and her optimise her self respect in the future.

If can be hard for some to be assertive, and if this is difficult -a friend or family member might help.

Unless they need to call an Ambulance, schools wouldn't "contact health" for advice about an ill child. They contact a parent, ask them to collect their child and advise them to seek medical attention for said child, either by taking them to a GP or A&E depending on the severity of the symptoms. Excluding an emergency situation where they have to call 999, NHS staff wouldn't be allowed to discuss a child's health with school staff without parental consent as schools have a duty of care but absolutely do not have the right to "act on behalf of the parent" when it comes to making decisions about a child's health.

Omg this is a criminal offence. She could have been made very ill how did they know that she may not have had a very serious reaction. To mess with someone’s food or drink is repulsive. It happened on school premises and they have a responsibility to make sure pupils are safe. What next ? Make your prescence felt Make an appointment with the school make sure as many people as possible see you Collect your daughter from school and do the same. Stand tall and make sure they know you are not to be messed with. I would go to the police they will have to look into it and might scare the bullies. Get your Doctor involved to check her out make as much fuss as you can Let them know you are not to be messed with and if your daughter is targeted again there will be consequences legal if necessary. You don’t have to go through with any of it but the threat is there. Don’t bother with the parents they don’t want to hear that their kids are malicious brats they probably already know Good Luck

Governors is an excellent call OP.

first Instance I would be contacting the school so find out what steps they are taking to hold these girls accountable
second instance I would be contacting the police because what’s saying they won’t spike someone else’s drink that has medical conditions
this is not okay, and as a mother of a child with complex medical conditions that something like this can cause them to end up in hospital or possibly die I find it highly disturbing that these are the things high school bullies are doing now

When did this happen? You say they were going to contact you this week as though it happened the week before. Then you’ve waited until after 5 pm on a Friday to start seeking external opinions. Did you not call today at 2 to find out why they hadn’t been in touch?

I think you’ve been a bit too trusting and passive. Understandable if the school have otherwise been good and said all the right things. But schools are busy and their focus and priority is almost never on the individual actions of children unless those actions are directed at the school in some way or there’s external pressure. You need to be the squeaky wheel.

Over the weekend, report it to the police. Ask them to investigate as the school have failed to and you do not feel they are able to take it seriously enough since it is a serious offence: Offences against the person act 1861, Section 24 - administering a noxious substance with intent to injure, harm or annoy another person. It has a maximum sentence of 10 years (though this would be at the lower end of the scale and not likely to get any sort of custodial sentence). Because they planned it and acted together, after a campaign against your DD (the bullying), it is more serious than if it were one girl just acting on a whim.

Email the school to let them know you’ve done this as you no longer have faith that they have are able to respond with the seriousness that this assault requires. Ask them to cooperate with the police and tell them you would like a meeting with the [senior leadership team members in charge of discipline and safeguarding lead - look these up on the school website] or the head teacher to discuss how they will keep your DD safe from further assaults and any retaliation for the rest of the school year.

Look up their bullying policy and have it with you to hold them to account, but do not let it over ride the police investigation. Actions should happen in parallel, especially in regards to them protecting your DD.

On Monday, separate to this communication, put in an official complaint about how the school have handled it so far (not about the assault, just about the lack of communication) as they did not get back to you when they said they would.

Make sure there is a significant paper trail that you can go back to if they try to brush things under the carpet.