To let almost 10 year old DD walk to Greggs

[LiarLiarKnickersAblaze]

We live in a medium sized city on a terraced street. At end & within sight of house is a Greggs. One small road to cross by our house (not a main road - small road between terraced houses). We've been trying to teach DD almost 10 some responsibility to get her ready for walking & travelling to school in Yr6 and then secondary. For context she is v tall and mature for her age. We let her pop to Greggs sometimes (about once a month) to get a sausage roll for breakfast. No issues so far however DD said this morning that they were asking questions like 'where's your Mum?'.

DD doesn't fully know this because trying to build her confidence but I still stand outside house and watch her from the porch, cross the small road and watch her walk in and then walk out then home. By this point I relocate to the window and have full line of sight of her walk.

AIBU?

Edit for context: it is 40 metres-ish away.

Good job you've sanctioned the amount of acceptable Greggs!

It's fine OP, make sure you give her enough money for some yum yums!!

Highly unlikely. Greg's are not social workers they just sell highly addictive unhealthy delicious food.
Probably just making conversation

Well walking to a corner shop at 10 is fine and to be encouraged but greggs for breakfast?

I think the almost 10 year old will be fine, having a sausage roll once in a while for breakfast isn't going to harm her. It's the same sausage roll that many people have for lunch or a snack.

I think what OP's DD is doing is so "normal" that I wonder why it even merits a thread.

I was simply suggesting an idea about why she'd been asked where her mum is. Short of asking the staff member, we are all just posing theories.

(I've never had a sausage roll for breakfast. I realise I must be odd).

I don’t see this as a problem. My 11 year old can walk all the way to the shop, which is a 10 min walk away. She never gets questioned

Maybe the child looks younger then her age, or appeared so to the staff member? I wouldn't have had a clue how old kids were until I had my own, I'd probably have aged down.
There is just so much more awareness of crime than there used to be, due to the Internet. It has always been there, just people didn't find out a lot of it. It is the world we live in. The staff member was just concerned.
Concern is much better than none, there are cases where this would have helped, how ever rare they may be.

I thought the same.
You don’t need to be a social worker. Perhaps a kind older lady who is just checking a 9 yr old who is buying a sausage roll for her breakfast is ok.
When horrible situations with children arise it’s always why didn’t anyone notice or do something. Perhaps area dependent but I’m in a village and people keep an eye out and check children are ok.
It’s a good chance to chat to your dc about appropriate responses eg yes mum is waiting for me etc.
We have a Greggs at end of road - can I recommend TooGoodToGo app, you get some great bags and your daughter might enjoy the surprise of seeing what she got - she’d just need to take your phone and swipe when she collected the bag.

That made me laugh and reminded me of years ago landing back at, I think, East Midlands from a disappointing holiday. As we came through the doors from Customs etc there was a Greggs and a Costa, we were delighted!

They do a breakfast range. Their bacon sarnies are great!

Childhood is being ripped to pieces nowadays, makes me so sad. When I was 10, in summer me and my friend (then 12) would get a bus across the city to get on a ferry to hten go up and down the hill to reach UNESCO beach (Curonian Spit if interesting to anyone). All alone. We would get sandwiches and all sort of junk food and fruit and spend entire day sunbathing and swimming in the sea. We did that until 16. Every summer. Thinking back, my childhood was heaven.

And never have we been asked where are our parents. Although some doggy alcoholics did approach us once or twice, we just gave them cold shoulder and the looks of disgust.

If one of the Greggs staff is a little concerned it'll be because they're worried the child isn't being fed at home, not that they don't think a ten year old should be allowed out alone. If she was buying a pint of milk I don't think the same concerns would be there. Just tell her to say 'at home, it's very close'.

Yes so strange. It’s almost as though there’s thousands of different people posting their opinions…

fieldsofbutterflies · Today 09:02
I knew someone would mention this but didn't expect it to be the first reply 😂

Oh, I did 😁

On holiday this week, had 2 scotch pies for breakfast yesterday. Back to the “massive salads” next week 🤣

I used to watch our eldest walk about the same distance to school, OP. If you can, why not?

This is absolutely peak mumsnet and the first reply too, even better

Hard drinking dogs were a problem in my youth too. There was a boozy poodle who used to put his little paws up for a scrap all the time. He hung around with a sausage dog who drank cider. Horrible pair.

I’d probably tell Gregs what you’re doing but there’s nothing wrong with it. I think most kids are table to walk that distance by 9.

Genuinely made me laugh out loud 🤣

What now?

It's fine. My DS10 Gets the train after school to two of his hobbies and I meet him there after work. Walking to Greggs nearby seems fairly harmless?

Thanks all! Yeah the response from the sales assistant made me second guess our decision.

Maybe it’s just the parents I know but loads don’t give their kids that kind of freedom at this age!

Totally fine and completely normal where I live for kids to out to play and go to the shops

Even further away than 40m 🤣

@LiarLiarKnickersAblaze do you live in a particularly dodgy area?

I'm asking because you mentioned your anxiety about it. 40 yards away is absolutely reasonable for a 10 year old who will soon be off to secondary school and imo there's no need to watch from the porch. It's all about gradually letting go.

we also live in an area where a lot of families are very nervous about giving their DC any independence. And we have been judged, a lot, for the independence we do give our children.

I always thought it was good. I still do, sort of, but I do worry that DS is a bit cocky now as a result. But possibl that's just a normal teenage thing.

Overall, at this age, I really can't see the problem with letting a child walk down the road to buy a sausage roll.

Breaking news:- Child has a Gregs sausage roll once a month for breakfast!!!

Clutches pearls in horror
😉