To not look at this couple in the same way anymore?

[AvrilAprill]

At the end of last year I made friends with a mum who’d just moved to the area. We got on great, as did our partners.

However, I’ve now found out that they first got together when she was 16 and he was 20/21. It genuinely makes me feel uncomfortable knowing that, and my husband says I’m being weird

Mumsnet:
Q: is 16 a child?
A: Of course not. They know their own minds. Could get a full time job and be a parent at 16.

Also Mumsnet:
Q: My 16yo DD is pregnant! Help!
A: How horrendous for you OP. What on earth are they going to do about their GCSEs? Handhold and fuzzy hug. You need a stern word with her about contraception and a trip to the clinic.

And once again the only person suggesting a 16 year old and a "grandad" (presumably they mean a 60+ year old, not the possible 30 year old grandads that exist) would be acceptable is the one arguing against such things. And bringing up 14 year olds... makes you wonder

It really helps if you read posts fully and in context, instead of just picking out words or phrases in isolation and twisting them to mean what you want to suggest they do.

As you will see from my post, I never said that I believe a 16yo and a grandad (of any age) is acceptable; the exact opposite.

You will also see that my citing the case of a 14yo - and this contingency has been mentioned by others on this thread - was to support my opinion on the inappropriateness of somebody who is over the age of consent having sex with somebody considerably older: showing how the age difference does sometimes matter very much indeed, but once you reach that magic 16, absolutely anything seems to go.

But I'm sure you realised this.

Could you please clarify on your last comment - "makes you wonder" - as I don't understand what you were driving at. I don't know if it was based on what I did say or what you tried to bizarrely suggest that I was saying.

I mean there's something suspicious abut someone who keeps trying to bring up 14 year olds and lowering the age of consent like it's what most people are talking about

Quite a number of people on this thread have mentioned children aged 14 starting relationships with significantly older people.

True, it's not the central focus of the thread, but when you have so many people poo-pooing 'only 4 or 5 years age difference' between a child and an adult having sex and constantly going on about 'how very mature' many 16yo girls are (a claim which personally really sets off my spidey senses) and calling them adults, of course there are going to be outliers who don't even wait until they're 16. After all, if a 16yo is 'an adult', then a 'mature' 15yo or 14yo must surely be 'almost an adult'.

I think I see what you're getting at, though: I, as one of the very few people on this thread advocating for protecting 16yo children from sexual experiences with considerably older people must, against all semblances of possible logic, be somehow keen to advocate 14yos having sex...

Yes they can.

There was one poster who mentioned a 14 year old with someone much older and most other posters agreed that this was wrong.

Again, YOU are the only one really suggesting a 14 year is as mature as a 16 year old (which the law considered legally old enough to make decisions such as medical care and having sex) and that is raising some serious red flags