Rich ‘friend’ harassing me

[Brunchclub]

A few weeks ago a ‘friend’ asked me to go for some drinks and I told him I didn’t have the money to do so. He offered to lend me some money as he really wanted to get out and enjoy the weather. I told him if I did then I couldn’t pay the money back until around the second week in July. He said this was absolutely fine.

Fast forward to last night, he asked for the money. I said I didn’t have it until when I had stated, he had 2 more of his friends (also male btw) message me throughout the evening claiming he needed the money to be able to eat and I was being unfair.

This morning somebody I know told me they saw him out watching the England game and was out until 4am. He owns his house, paid for by his parents, his car Is paid for by parents and he doesn’t actually do anything except basic admin tasks for a few hours a day as his parents own the company. He is very very comfortable.

AIBU to be upset he had several friends message me late at night claiming he was going hungry when In fact im say with rolled up toilet paper in my underwear as I can’t afford sanitary towels and I’m on my period, I have 2 meals in my freezer but nothing for the rest of the week until I get paid on Friday and my bank is wiped out from vet bills just so he can ask for money that wasn’t due to be paid back yet because he wanted more for buying drugs and drinks?

neither Is OP though. It doesn’t make you ‘better’.

I work with children. As it’s summer holidays starting this month, it’s £40 I could spare to pay back as I won’t have travel costs to work once holidays start.

Ok op. Fair enough. We’ve all been there, but don’t let this friend do this to you again. It’s not a situation you want to be in when you don’t have to.

Pay him and tell him to fuck off

And also, you must be a good person because even though short of money you did the right thing and paid for antibiotics for your cat. So many people wouldn’t have done that.

Sure but it’s a bit different when you’re borrowing money to do so.

pay him back when you said you would and don’t speak to him again. He’s being an arsehole but a lesson in not borrowing cash unless it’s desperate.

I'd be tempted to write him a cheque, send him a picture of it and say its in the post, then post it to him timed to arrive by Friday.

Then you have repaid him, on your terms, and he has the hassle of having to bank it.

Then never speak to him again.

The ‘perfect’ people on this thread that ‘wouldn’t spend it on drinking’ it’s not about the drink, it’s about spending time with someone, being poor is incredibly lonely and isolating as people get fed up of you having no money to do things, in the same way that people get fed up of people with chronic illnesses that have to decline invitations. It’s very similar, as someone with multiple chronic illnesses and having been poor in the past.

And you both are quite right in your analysis. This person is no friend to the OP.

I like this idea 😂. But will op have a cheque book, I haven’t had one for years .

Well said 👏. I am sorry to hear you are struggling. The fact he told other people you owe him money tells you everything you need to know about him. A true friend wouldn’t have done that. I hope you find yourself on the up soon xx

Great idea! I’ve never thought of this before xx

Oap you did nothing wrong treating yourself to an after out. Your posts have broken my heart a bit. I know it's tough but you never do know what's around the corner, life is full of surprises so don't be too sure you won't get to do some of the things you'd like to. This man is not a friend as you've realised, you know what to do 💐 xx

Good God there are some smug gobshites on here, so busy lecturing they can’t read what the OP has v clearly stated, repeatedly.

Perhaps instead of getting your jollies scolding, you could all take a breath and read all the posts so you look less like hectoring arseholes?

@Brunchclub sadly you’ve learned the hard way about this friend but sounds like you have his number. A bit like PPs on this thread, seems he’s using this as a stick to beat you with to make himself feel better. Leave him to rot once you’ve paid him back.

I, too, hope a new Labour gov will start to fight back the crippling levels of poverty and associated stigma that grew under the tories. Not enough to be poor, you should be punished for it and miserable every second of the day too. Far too many people are in denial about how close they are to being poor themselves. I hope those thinking they would be ‘better’ at being poor never get to test their certainty.

Some absolute dickheads on this thread in their fucking perfect world. God forbid someone dared have a night out and enjoyed themselves. So what if all of you perfect people wouldn't do it, that's NOT WHAT THIS POST IS ABOUT!!

Are you a bit thick or you dont understand a week has 7 days, and you usually get paid on one of the five from Mon-Friday, and that it may not necessarily be the first day of that week?
If it was me my payday was 14th, I could pay back on the 14th but not on the 13th?
Jesus wept to have to explain such basuc stuff to supposed adults.

Op, I volunteer for a charity that runs a food club and when people walk in and tell us they can't afford food or sanitary products before payday we give them some for free.

When you next get paid have a look on Amazon at period cups. You can get a pack of 2 for not very much money at all and they in pretty much infinitely reusable! They do take some time to get used to, but might be a good option for you!

She has answered that question a dozen times!

Why don't you read the whole thread, or at least the OP's posts? Then you wouldn't have to keep kicking her while she's down. Unless you enjoy that.....

Sorry your friend ended up being such an arse op. You're an awesome pet mom and your right, everyone deserves a night out with friends once in a while.

Why don’t you follow your own advice? I’ve replied to op after this one. But, you don’t get to decide what I post on an open forum.

But yet, you couldn't resist doing just that. Interesting. 🙄

Vet bill was paid. They aren’t going without, my cat has his medication and is on the mend. 🤷🏼‍♀️

Well then, bully for you! Here is your medal,🏅; wear it proudly!

Once you get paid, have a look at reusable period pads. You can get a starter set for around a tenner on Amazon if you avoid the more expensive brand ones. I know it won't save you loads, but will mean they are there when you need them.

I would also agree with previous posters that he was probably hoping you would pay him back in a non-monetary way amd is now passed off. Avoid him at all costs in future. Hopefully we will get some better weather soon, so you can spend a sunny afternoon with a picnic blanket and cheap fizz with a better friend instead.