To not want to ‘sit in the park’ on a second date?

[LookOverHere]

I met a chap on a dating app a few weeks ago, we met up for a drink for our first date and it was fun. He’s calm, has a good sense of humour, nice smile, good job. Both in our late 40’s. He texted me the day after to say he’d love to see me again, and since then he’s sent the occasional text, thoughtful, remembers what I’ve said. But… for the second he suggested “shall we sit in the park?”

AIBU to be disappointed with this? What does it even mean… I’m too old to be hanging out in the park! That’s where I had my teenage dates. The weather forecast also says rain. It’s not a picnic, or he’d mention it. I think it’s a low effort suggestion, a bit weird for a professional guy, and something I might do with a friend or colleague (we sometimes grab a coffee in the park). All my successful relationships all started with a romantic meal. Is this how it is these days? All views welcome…

Lol or maybe he is thinking of a stroll around the gardens in Regent’s Park and then champagne and strawberries on a blanket? I’d be much more impressed with that than a table at Dishoom.

He sounds lovely. I hope he finds someone more suitable

It’s a ‘2nd date’ - you don’t really know each other.

Personally I’d rather get to know someone in a casual setting like this one as opposed to committing to a ‘romantic’ meal with someone I barely know.

I love sitting in the park chatting with a cup of coffee. Also most early dates I’ve organised with men I’ve been really into have been a posh picnic in the summer. Unless the weather is awful I wouldn’t want to be stuck indoors having a meal.

I’d say try it out. Your dating styles may just be a bit different, ie you seem to like old fashioned and formal and he is into casual and easygoing. Nothing wrong with either, just make sure you’re not too different, for example him being an outdoors enthusiast and you appreciating the finer things in life.

Given he seems to have a lot of plus points - and it is NOT easy to find decent men online dating - I'd give him the benefit of the doubt, but would say hmm it looks like it might rain, maybe let's save the park for a drier day?

I would be saying "No thanks, let's meet at x instead".

I said I would rather sit on my arse alone watching a film at home, than GO FOR A SIT IN THE PARK for a SECOND DATE! I didn't say I would rather sit on my arse alone watching a film alone, than go out at ALL.

But you knew that. You just twisted what I said to suit your agenda.

Yeah I am sure if he looks hard enough, he will find some sad lonely woman who is desperate for a man - ANY man - and is happy to go for 'walking dates' with a man who is too tight fisted to put his hand in his pocket to buy her a coffee even. I am sure a handful of women like this exist.

Fuk me sideways. I am glad I have been married 35+ years, and am not on the dating scene now. I come from a time where men bought women drinks and meals and treated them like the fucking Queens they are. I'd still be single at nearly 60 if all the men I met were so tight-arsed, they just wanted to go on 'walking dates' and dates where we just 'sit in the park.' Nah, fuck that! This kind of shit is for 14 year olds! 😆

/

Very much depends on the park and weather. If someone suggested going to the Royal Botanical Gardens in Melbourne for a date, I'd be fine if the weather was.

I'm assuming the proposed park is a cut above the ordinary, with a cafe.

I go to the park most days, I will be heading there in a few minutes in fact - haven't been on a slide or swings in decades.

All you are doing is showing that you belong to the lacking in imagination brigade 😂

I’d actually love this - grab coffee and sit and talk and people watch.

Nice

This is the thread where women's masks slip and you can see what rhey really want. Its just ugly.

Doesn’t appear some bother with a mask in the first place.

No dating hasn't become this but some desperate women out there will accept bottom of the barrel men so think this is acceptable.
Know your worth and cut him off.

Broke dusty men can stay with the desperate lonely women.

Women with no emotional or insecure issues and men that aren't broke and bummy can date each other.

People want to date outside their calibre of people that's the issue on why men don't want to date women.

I think it's a personality thing. That sounds like my perfect date.
Maybe you aren't well matched

Wow, you've got a high opinion of yourself. Some of us would prefer to be in an equal partnership and don't actually see ourselves as "fucking Queens". We don't need men buying us drinks and meals - and hey, I'm even older than you are!! Some posters on this thread seem to think men exist soley to spend money on them - it's like returning to a time many. many decades ago.

It's ugly to be desperate and give everything to a man who makes no effort to court you. It's embarrassing and the reason society is so f up. A man can take you for a "walk" like a dog and you will just lie on your back and sleep with him easy. Then say you're a "strong woman" no darling you get used and dashed away to the side.
Some women make me cringe literally 😷

Sorry to break the bad news but you will NEVER be equal to a man.
Women carry babies, get paid less. You're just delusional and have a low opinion of yourself.

Good heavens, all this talk about money. True, going to a park is inexpensive, but so what?

For example, I like classical music. If I suggested going to the symphony, I hope my date wouldn't be thinking "wow, that's really expensive", and suffer through the perfomance thinking "when does this dreary shit end".

Sorry, for me, anyway, money doesn't have much to do with it. I would be looking for compatibility, companionship, friendship.

Maybe I'm that way because I, and my neighbours, and everyone I know, are okay with money. As far as I can tell, because money is never mentioned.

I wouldn't be personally impressed by this because I enjoy going out to dinner. A dinner date tells you a lot about a person. What sort of food they enjoy, what sort of wine they like, how they treat waitstaff etc.

I'm all for parks but not when you've just started dating someone.

OP I suspect your date is either very tight, broke, or is seeing so many other women he doesn't want to make a big commitment of time or money.

Just out of interest how much do you charge for a date?

Your first clue was that he split the bill for two drinks on your first date

seems dating is very transactional. How many nice restaurants for a shag?

Absolutely this. This whole thread really shows that for a huge amount of women feminism never happened!