To not want to ‘sit in the park’ on a second date?

[LookOverHere]

I met a chap on a dating app a few weeks ago, we met up for a drink for our first date and it was fun. He’s calm, has a good sense of humour, nice smile, good job. Both in our late 40’s. He texted me the day after to say he’d love to see me again, and since then he’s sent the occasional text, thoughtful, remembers what I’ve said. But… for the second he suggested “shall we sit in the park?”

AIBU to be disappointed with this? What does it even mean… I’m too old to be hanging out in the park! That’s where I had my teenage dates. The weather forecast also says rain. It’s not a picnic, or he’d mention it. I think it’s a low effort suggestion, a bit weird for a professional guy, and something I might do with a friend or colleague (we sometimes grab a coffee in the park). All my successful relationships all started with a romantic meal. Is this how it is these days? All views welcome…

OP you say “all your successful relationships started with a romantic meal”… but how successful can they possibly have been for you to be back on the dating scene?

Personally I think that if you like the person you like any time spent with them, whether it costs 50p or £500. I also think it keeps things more easy going, sitting down for a romantic meal in a posh restaurant isn’t everyone’s idea of a good date- I actually couldn’t think of anything more awkward than this for a first date, I’d much rather a trip round the park, maybe grab a coffee or an ice cream etc

@OtterMouse @TemuSpecialBuy I haven't actually been there for a while.
Last time I went someone had made hilarious papier mache heads for the headless statues 😂

Agreed

I’d probably reply saying “what did you have in mind for the park?”. He might be thinking of a nice blanket and picnic hamper!

Alternatively, he might say coffee and stroll which is low key sure, but I don’t think it’s the worst second date suggestion. A lot of people just feel more comfortable in that setting as it’s less pressure than the formality of a restaurant and he might feel he can get to know you more. I think if you go you’ll also see where that leads - if you meet in the park in the afternoon then after a walk/time to chill, he might suggest grabbing something to eat and it might end up being dinner as well.

If it was just coffee and a stroll I’d expect the third date suggestion to be dinner. If it became a pattern of suggesting low key / cheap dates then I’d be concerned but as a one off I think it’s quite nice.

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I’d take that as more, I could leave and go home if I didn’t like the date enough!

I saw this after posting! When you say “split the bill” is that because he got a round of drinks and then you went up to the bar and got the next round? Or was it table service and when the bill came you split it across two cards? If the first, totally normal. If the second, he’s tight and I wouldn’t go on the date.

From someone who pays her part on dates - park is a shit choice unless you are student and comfortable sipping lager on a bench and pissing beging a tree opposite of it.

Its only been one date. I would have thought a walk around the park and a coffee is totally fine second date esp on OLD.

My other half impressed me the most by making me dinner on our 3rd date. Didn’t cost much but he put in lots of effort.
It seems like this fella doesn’t want to invest in half a dinner bill or a few hours of his time.

@LookOverHere The hills are THAT way! >>>>>>>

RUN from a man who wants to 'sit in the park' on a second date. He is a tightwad who doesn't want to fork out a bean. How spectacularly unappealing - and what a repugnant trait in a man! 😖

Even when I was 18-ish, boys my age took me to the pub and bought drinks for me, and paid my entry into nightclubs and bought me drinks.. From the first date! (We would start to split costs more 3-4 dates in, but any man who wants to impress a girl/woman does NOT say 'let's sit in the park for the evening' on a second date!) Fucking hell! 😂

EWWWWWWW this would give me the ick. A man in his 40s suggesting a sit in the park! LMFAO! Nooooooooooooo!

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WTF 😳, it’s only date 2, for all you know he might be the who is not feeling anything!

I'd love it, but then I think everything I want in life is outside. Maybe he wants to make sure his potential date likes the outdoors.

Why is he even bothering then? I would rather sit on my own at home watching a film - with a bottle of wine and a takeaway for one, than go out with a 'man' for a second date that consists of 'walking in the park!' Fuk me. Some women need to raise their bar if they think this is even remotely OK!

All the Lolz! 😆

I would love this, my first date with DH was in a park by the river. Maybe not the right fit for you though. Everyone is into different things.

Sounds like he goes on a lot of online dates and doesn’t want to spend money.

How successful have all of your other relationships been if you are still dating?

what’s the harm in going, take a picnic with you. It could be your best relationship yet.

I wouldn't like that. Bit werid past a certain age! I'd understand why teenagers do that, because they can't go to bars/clubs. But when you're past 18, you want to go somewhere with a bar.

Yep!