To feel pleased that neighbour’s kids are being pulled out of private school?

[grengat]

I am friends ish with my neighbour and I do feel very conflicted about this. Since we moved in 5 years ago we have had it ALL about her son’s education. How he’s doing so well, on the path to a brilliant future, all the sports he’s doing… every time we see her she manages to mention something about the bloody school! We could never afford it and she knows this. Anyway… turns out he won’t be going back after Christmas and they are looking round state schools this week. I feel great about it. Finally my kids are on a level playing field with this kid and I am glad it’s happened. Think I just need a safe space to say it as obviously can’t IRL!

Sorry should add.. conflicted as I know son is gutted about it. But I’m pleased on an adult to adult level with his mum!!

😳😳 wow!

I feel great about it.

That's really weird and the 'adult' level you talk about is something you are missing.

Says a lot about you and not much about her tbh

You sound jealous

What an utterly unpleasant thing to say.

You sound nice

Personally I don't take pleasure in other people's difficulties. They must have been overstretching themselves. I'd have found their smugness annoying too but the upheaval must be hard for the kid.

I know what you mean op
Its not about the DC, its about the boasting parent getting their comeuppance.

Fair enough. I'd probably feel the same.

It sounds as if your neighbours have had some bad luck and possible financial troubles. And their child is upset and going through a hard time. And you are (a) pleased about it and (b) boasting about that online. You don't sound very nice.

You and your neighbour sound well matched…

Doesn't sound like her neighbour was pleasant.

They were on a level playing field anyway

Schadenfreude

It's a myth that children are on an equal playing field just because they attend state schools. Presumably if they could afford private school in the first place even if they can't now they're okay for money; they'll be able to afford tutors, extra curricular activities, sports, enriching holidays and experiences etc. It's not worth focusing on anyone else really, but I get you want to vent somewhere anonymously as you recognise it'd be savage to say in real life. Sounds like she was happy enough to rub it in your face which I'm guessing was the annoying part.

I think this is called Schadenfreude.

Some NT parents finally experiencing what its like for those of us with children with disabilities.

Strange, very strange indeed

We have friends who can no longer afford private school. They are devastated, worried about how their kids will adapt, and the kids are upset. It’s really nasty for you to be so gleeful.

Wow, to take joy in a child losing their friends and having to leave their school. That's a certain kind of low to me.

What?

Love that word.

YABU. I'm the first to denounce private schools, but I couldn't feel gleeful about a child being made to leave their school no matter what their parents had been like.

And I know the VAT private school thing might mean this happens more, and I'm not against VAT on private schools, but again, I wouldn't feel pleased. Hope this isn't some kind of weird reverse to make a point.

I think that is bloody horrible to take joy in a child's disappointment