Surprise day trip - sister mad!

[Bellyblueboy]

I will open this by saying I don’t have kids!

it’s my sister’s birthday today. As her present I have booked a day trip to London for us (we are in Dublin). I knew she wouldn’t want an overnight because of her dog.

I have booked flights and a few things for us to do. I have arranged someone to come and walk the dog (our brother).

she is angry because it’s a long day - first and last flights and she says it will be too much for the kids.

we would need to leave the house at about 6:30am and our flight gets back at about 9pm.

I thought in the summer holidays this would be grand - but clearly not🫣.

I have apologised - the flights are non refundable. She and I can’t go without the kids as her husband is away on a work trip and no grandparents are free.

So my question - do you think she will come around? Do I go alone? I honestly thought I was doing a nice thing but she says I am clueless and don’t understand children. The kids are 12 and 16. The 16 year old does love a lie in and on non-school days is rarely up before noon! But he has got up early before for holidays.

I wish you were my sister!

she is totally wrong imo

although getting them up in the morning might be an effort

I would not like a day trip booked for me without discussing.Maybe if you had she could have arranged childcare and it actually feel like a break for her?Getting the kids ready for 630am really is an early start.She's probably imagining the hard work getting the kids out of bed and then tired teenage behaviour all day.So nice thought ,but I'd feel the same as her and I travel a lot.Anyway you could arrange something without the kids?

It is a nice thought but in her position I would have preferred to be told in advance. It is something that needs a bit of planning

What planning ? Get up a bit earlier than normal. Go to the airport, get on the plane.

This.
And I really love London.

I don’t think you’ve pitched it right for teen and tween either, my kids would be bored out of their minds. We would shop, do a rib (fast boat) ride, a show, dinner somewhere fabulous.

The London Eye is the most boring experience I have ever experienced. The boat trip down the Thames isn’t hugely better. My kids are 11 and 16 and would genuinely hate this itinerary .

And we all do love London and visit at least monthly.

I also couldn’t think of anything worse than such a long day, which sounds easy to you because you don’t imagine it with the reality of 27 bazillion whys, moans and groans from the teen and tween who will be feeling equally ugh about the whole thing. And I second/third/whatever the other posters have said about feeling tired reading it and imagining how tired I would be for days after.

It’s a bad call and an unintentionally emotionally manipulative one - I would be in tears if I’m honest and I don’t tend to cry! But she’s got the guilt of you wasting the money, or the exhaustion and dread of going. She’s in a complete catch 22, none of which was of her making or within her control and there’s no positive outcome for her.

It sounds fab!!! I’ve a 14yo who doesn’t get out of bed before 11 a lot on school holidays but he’d be jumping for it!! Some people hate surprises/ things being organised for them though

I think it sounded like a lovely present. If you fancy a new friend in London if you end up going on your own give me a shout!!!

Given the time you'll have to spend in airports and transit to/from town from whichever London airport you're flying into, I don't think that sounds much fun. I'd be annoyed if someone booked that for me without asking. But I think your heart was in the right place!

She might come around once she’s processed it a bit. My kids 12 & 17 love to sleep but would love this trip. My DD & I did London in a day in the last half term. We were on the 6:30am train and got home at 10:00pm. It was a long day but fun, she slept on the train home and slept until lunch the next day.

YANBU. If she’s free then she should go at least, and leave dc with your brother maybe.

If she doesn’t go, then don’t go on any future trips she organises for you.

It sounds like a lovely idea. School trips can last at least as long as your planned day. You go, hope you have a good time.

Omg your sister is an ungrateful wuss! I thought you were going to say the kids were 2 and 6, not 12 and 16. You must wonder why you bothered.

Am I missing the part where a 12 year old and a 16 year old can't be left for the day ...

Or is it the usual mumsnet "we can't leave our precious angels until they are at 38"

You visit London monthly but you would be tired for days afterwards having to get up at 6:30?

OP it sounds amazing. I would pay more attention to the votes then some of the frankly mad comments on here.

Your sister is being unreasonable. Being angry over a gift is childish. She doesn't have to accept.

You used to do this loads before the kids...but the kids are 16 and 12? That's a long time for things to change.

If she has to shepherd the kids through two plane trips in one day you've given her a lot of work for a present.

Completely ungrateful. Mine are a similar age and would love it. Wish my sister was so generous!

I think it’s a lovely gesture!
My sister and myself do often do things like this. I wouldn’t be moaning!

@Bellyblueboy I think it was a lovely plan and you have done nothing wrong at all. I think your sisters reaction is v bizarre tbh. The kids are plenty old enough to cope .

Ha I thought you were going to say the kids were 2 and 4 or something and was going to say you were being unreasonable and should have checked. But my goodness 12 and 16 year olds can cope with a long day once in a while!

Might be off the point but is your sister worried the kids don't have photo ID to get on the plane and worried about the cost/timing to get it?

Hmm you saying she wouldn't let you take them alone suggests there's something bigger going on. If you get on well it's strange she wouldn't want you to take them, is she very anxious generally? It sounds a bit like a big issue tbh

Were you planning on paying for everything? Food, bus, taxi, entertainment etc for her and the two teens?
Flights from Dublin to London are cheap enough however a full day in London would be expensive, particularly with exchange rate (I’m in Ireland)

Her children are in secondary school. They could stay home all day or go out with friends. The children don't need to go on the trip.