Surprise day trip - sister mad!

[Bellyblueboy]

I will open this by saying I don’t have kids!

it’s my sister’s birthday today. As her present I have booked a day trip to London for us (we are in Dublin). I knew she wouldn’t want an overnight because of her dog.

I have booked flights and a few things for us to do. I have arranged someone to come and walk the dog (our brother).

she is angry because it’s a long day - first and last flights and she says it will be too much for the kids.

we would need to leave the house at about 6:30am and our flight gets back at about 9pm.

I thought in the summer holidays this would be grand - but clearly not🫣.

I have apologised - the flights are non refundable. She and I can’t go without the kids as her husband is away on a work trip and no grandparents are free.

So my question - do you think she will come around? Do I go alone? I honestly thought I was doing a nice thing but she says I am clueless and don’t understand children. The kids are 12 and 16. The 16 year old does love a lie in and on non-school days is rarely up before noon! But he has got up early before for holidays.

Don't be disheartened. It's a lovely present.

Don't forget that there are a lot of people on MN who refuse to answer the door so the idea of a surprise trip (which might make them tired) is clearly outrageous.

You sound lovely and thoughtful.

6:30-9:00 is a long day for the kids?! 😂😂😂 on what planet is that true for a 12 and 16 year old.

That's a fabulous present - me and my teenage boys would love it.

I’m very surprised about all the posters saying they’d love a trip like this. Do people really take 1h30 long flights for day trips?
If the times are correct then they’d get to the airport at 7am. Gates usually close around 30 minutes before, so the flight is not until around 8.15. You don’t get out of the airport in London before 10am and the earliest you can start your “lazy breakfast” is around 10.45.
You land back in Dublin at 9pm, so need to be at the gate in London by 7pm, so need to leave London before 6pm, but you want to have dinner at the airport and if by that you mean more than just grab a sandwich, you need to leave before 5pm.
People would really do that? For less than 5h in London (excluding breakfast)?
Very unlikely you’d have enough time for rib ride, London eye and a sit down lunch. And that’s assuming that everything goes super smoothly with no transport delays.

What an absolute brat. Would it kill her to say 'thank you' when her lovely sister does something nice for her?
You sound great OP.

I think your sister is bloody ungrateful and incredibly rude. The dc are old enough to stay at home for the day if they don’t want to go - and if they do why on earth wouldn’t she want you to take them without her if she won’t go? I hope you can find a friend to go with instead - and please don’t buy her a replacement gift!

I’m very surprised about all the posters saying they’d love a trip like this. Do people really take 1h30 long flights for day trips?

Yep.
I've done Dublin in a day and we'll be doing Belfast this summer.

I think your sister is being absolutely ridiculous if she thinks her teenage kids can’t cope with a
day trip to London from Dublin. They’re not toddlers!

I'd hate being forced into a long busy day without being asked first. It would make me extremely anxious, especially about getting back.

Sounds a very tiring day to me. Is it a bit much for her perhaps?

They're at the ages where I WOULD book a trip like this, it's when they're little it's awkward. Mine are a similar age and love lie ins, it doesn't hurt them to get up early when needed!

Probably not the wisest thing to do as a surprise of they're the complaining type of kids, but as it's for their mums birthday, they could suck it up.

Is 16 year old bang slap in middle of exams? If so. It's a pretty stressful time and she may just be on edge and worrying about those anyway.

I think I'd say that the offer remains open and to let you know if she changes her mind nearer the time.

After that I'd leave it for her to think about for a bit. She may be a bit calmer once exams are done if that's what's happening

I'm in Ireland and the idea of going to London just for a day sounds like hell to me, sorry OP. The stress of an airport twice in one day and the long day etc would not be for most people. I'd say she was thinking a day in a nice town, lunch etc, stress free and relaxing.

I have a small child and while I would love the thought, having it sprung on me as a surprise would be slightly too much. Happy to take my DD places but I'd like to be able to think it through in terms of what she would need before making any concrete plans (such as booking non refundable flights). She might just need some time to think it over, and as the flights are now paid for she's feeling extra pressure to make sure it's all good.

Nice thought, execution needs some work, is the gist I think.

But the OPs sister doesn't have small children.
At 12 and 16 they can sort themselves out!

It’s a long day with a lot of travel. I wouldn’t have thought it worth it just for a day.
She’d have to walk the dog beforehand too, if your brother would only pop in during the day. Too much hassle for me to get excited about I’m afraid, but you’ve already acknowledged that.

A good idea, but one to ask about before booking I think. You’ve told her in advance anyway to get the reaction you did, it’s a pity you didn’t do it before booking,

I know, but she still may need to think it over as to what would be enjoyable with them. That's how some people work, they need to have things straight in their mind.

I hate surprises. Can't abide them. Spontaneous trips are fine, as long as I'm involved in the decision and have had 10 minutes to work out what's needed.

I wish you were my sister, that sounds brilliant, I have to admit when given the gift I might be a little overwhelmed, but to be mad and through it back at you, what a spoiled brat. Maybe like me she will think on it, and release it’s a perfect trip and get excited, if she doesn’t, then I stick to my spoiled brat name

please don’t buy her another present

Gosh some people are so dramatic!!
I think it's a lovely idea, and for heavens sake the children are 12 and 16 - not 2 and 3.....
Your sister is entitled to say no sorry that doesn't suit, but angry? That's an extreme reaction.
To whoever said they need to get up at 5am for a 6.30am leave the house - are you bonkers?!
6am wake, shower, bags and out the door. The OP already said they will be having breakfast so no need to fit that in.
Honestly some people on here just like to make a big deal for arguments sake.

Hope you go - with or without sister - and have a lovely time.

I hate surprises. Can't abide them. Spontaneous trips are fine, as long as I'm involved in the decision and have had 10 minutes to work out what's needed.

She's got weeks.
They don't go until July.

Everyone has different tolerances levels of travel and it depends on your circumstances. Pre kids I would enjoy a manic day but now I try to keep most weekends fairly chill. I work full time in a stressful job with a long commute and always have piles of washing a housework. A busy weekend does have a knock on impact as I struggle to catch up both on tiredness and general household chaos.

At 12 and 16, sounds like an amazing opportunity.

They can sleep on the plane if they're tired and the action-packed day will keep them going.

But she still wasn't involved in the decision to book her and her children onto flights to a different place.

My sister is in her 30s now and still struggles to get up early. When she was a teenager, trying to get her out of bed early for anything was awful. She was lovely most of the time but woken up early she was vile. It was not a pleasant experience whenever we went anywhere before 10am (and even around that time was still difficult). My mum would have hated being told she had to get her up to leave the house that early. But anyone that didn't have to deal with early morning sister wouldn't know she wasn't always a lovely girl.

Even today, I wouldn't book her onto anything with that early a start without asking her first.

It's a nice thought, but some involvement of OPs sister in booking the times probably wouldn't have gone amiss.

NO! Do NOT buy her another present please.

She's pissed all over this one, don't reward bad behaviour.

Imagine her reaction if you had refused to go on a trip she organised for you?

She's ungrateful. Take the kids and have a great day without her.