10 year old using the tube alone?!!

[LIKley]

DD is in Y6, her school has kids from all over London and we are used to her friends not being super close geographically.
DD’s best friend is one of the youngest in their year, so only 10 right now.

Planning a sleepover for the girls as they won’t be at the same school next year, I asked the girls parents how she will be getting to ours and was asked if I could meet her at my nearest tube station, I assumed a parent would be meeting me there with her but no they intend to let their 10 year old get the tube alone + 2 line changes one of them either at Victoria or Green Park which if you know London are hardly going to be quiet and easy to navigate at 10.

Parent insists it’s fine and the girl knows the stations well and has been using one of them alone to get to a hobby all of Y6!!

Now I know know, most kids will be getting the tube to school alone in just a couple of months but the thought of asking a 10 year old to navigate a busy station like Victoria on her own makes me feel ill!

AIBU to say to the parents that I’ll just pick her up from there house? Equally AIBU to think it’s bloody absurd to have a 10 year old make this journey?

Martin Allen was a 12 year old boy who was thought to be abducted from London Underground in 1979. That is the only child I am aware of that has ever been abducted from the underground.

DDs used the tube alone from Year 6, so the same age. We lived in zone 1 or 2 throughout their childhood and used the tube with them several times a week as we had no car, so they were more comfortable with it compared to dc in the outer zones who get driven around a lot. Our local station was one of the busiest in London so they wouldn’t be fazed by a busy interchange. I was explaining the tube/bus network and how to deal with rerouting our journeys every time we took a journey or had something unexpected to deal with, from toddler age really, so they just absorbed that information and know the network like the back of their hands.

OP I live in London with good transport links, so I rarely drive and was regularly getting my DC to work out interchanges and which tube we needed from the time they could read. By 10 they were very good at it.

When other parents offered to drive my DC rather than let them travel independently, I felt either patronised (I can help you, poor busy working mum, and now you owe me a favour) or disapproved of (I will look after your DC properly as you clearly neglect them). Do please see it from the other parents’ point of view.

As for @EnglishBluebell , I assume she’s being ironic. Nobody is that precious and out of touch with the real world, surely!

My son is 10. He gets the train after school to an activity which involves changing trains (and technically stations). I can track him at all times and he knows lots of people in the area where he can ask for help. I love that he's got some independence and so does he!!

If this child's mother (and the child!) is happy with the situation, why aren't you?

How do you propose you stop a grown adult from doing what the fuck she wants?!

This.

I think it is good that the parents have taught the girl so much independence.

Changing on a Tube line really isn't that difficult. She knows which line to take and follows the signs. At that age I took the bus into town; this doesn't seem any more complicated.

Tell me you don’t live in London without a saying you don’t live in London

😂

Lol how on earth would you stop a grown adult travelling to London. Hardly up to you to " let" her. All 3 of mine travelled into London on occasions as teens and we live in Essex ( proper Essex not romford lol)

More worrying that the Dad of the 11 year did nothing about it. Fine example to show his son on how to look the other way

This thread is frightening, scary, re how over protective some parents are these days. The assumptions are frightening. Posters saying the parents couldn't be bothered to teach them. Clearly the parents already have. Most schools encourage parents to get their children ready for the yr7 travel to secondary school, in year 6. I agree with @easylikeasundaymorn : "use the tube if they are 11 but not a day before"? They say teens have anxiety issues these days. Only because most of the parents do, clearly!

I got the tube to school everyday at 11 and my school was one stop away from Victoria...

@CowboyJoanna :

"I wouldn't let my DD travel alone to London even when she's a grown woman.

YABU."

Are you for real? You're going to give your children a complex. They should be able to use public transport from about age 11. You don't want your child to go anywhere alone until she's an adult? This is very poor parenting.

I think we've found the mothers occasionally mentioned by fed up managers on threads about snowflake 20somethings whose mums ring in sick for them or to harangue the manager for expecting their adult child to work out how to get to a client's premises by an unfamiliar route. Poor kids.

People have to be taking the piss, surely?

Who knows! My DS has been travelling independently since he was 10 but he has a friend (now 14) who gets dropped at the gym and picked up which is no more than a ten minute walk away fro his house and never goes anywhere independently. It's a real issue!

Surely some of these posters are using satire?!

We don't even live in London and my 14 year old nephew is able to take the train and use the tube. I suspect ds will be the same in a year or two.

People.think their children are so much less competent than they are. I am glad we allow.children to be children for longer but let's not forget thay it wasn't that long ago that 16byear old were routinely marrying or going off to war.

Kids are amazing in Japan. It was quite an adjustment when we were there. I love it. Anyone who worries about kid's ability to problem solve should watch "Old Enough" series. I believe it is on Netflix.

I love Old Enough!

Not letting them catch public transport until 14/15 and not letting a grown woman catch the tube alone (as if you could stop them!) are peak MN madness!!!

The only time I got lost in London was because we caught the bus (a nice man told us where to get off when we said where we were heading but we missed the stop). We just headed for the nearest tube station and quickly and easily worked our way back, hopping tubes where needed. Much easier than getting lost anywhere else. I've got no sense of direction but feel confident in London because its so easy

This is my fear, them ending up on the tracks. And paedos. No way would my 10 year old be using trains and tubes alone.

I sympathise with the concern re sexual harrasment and assault as let's face it, most women have certainly experienced this so we know it's true. But we also know that it's mostly manageable and our children, especially our girls, will have this experience no matter what.

Re the track thing - ridiculous and demonstrates a complete lack of understanding of risk. According to a FOI request, is some info on this: [[https://tfl.gov.uk/corporate/transparency/freedom-of-information/foi-request-detail?referenceId=FOI-4616-1718#:~:text=Over%20the%20last%203%20years,)%20or%20fatal%20(illness). tfl.gov.uk/corporate/transparency/freedom-of-information/foi-request-detail?referenceId=FOI-4616-1718#:~:text=Over%20the%20last%203%20years,)%20or%20fatal%20(illness). This is from 2018, but I have not seen any indication it has got particlarly worse. The relevant bit is: "Over the last 3 years there were 131 incidents recorded of passengers falling on the track, this represents 1 incident per 30 million journeys on the underground. Of those incidents 51% resulted in no injury reported, 44% minor injuries and 5% recorded as a person ill, specified (major) or fatal (illness)."

Every child is an individual.

We live in London so I know Victoria station well.

my daughter at 10 could easily managed this.

she was taught from an early age how to travel - how to follow the tube map and how to ask for help from staff if she couldn’t find a platform etc…

my son at 10 - no way!!!! - at age 19 now - he still couldn’t do this journey (sen)

the child’s parents know their capabilities - it is their decision alone as to how their child travels.

no one else’s thoughts or opinions are relevant.

This is ridiculous! There are staff to ask and presumably this young lady has been experiencing travel and coping well. What's it got to do with you how they treat her? She's hardly abused you don't need to step in.