Would you go to a friends engagement party on the day of your birthday?

[Sevensummers]

My birthday is in September and my friend just recently told our friendship group that her engagement part is on my birthday. I immediately said I won’t be able to come because it’s my birthday and I’ll be doing something nice with my boyfriend, was planning a nice weekend away, however nothing is booked yet. I said to my sister its a shame because I would’ve liked to go to that, but it’s only an engagement party, it’s not as if it’s her wedding day. My sister said why don’t I just do my birthday getaway the weekend before/after but I said no because it’s nice to do it on my actual birthday, I want my birthday to be about me, I don’t want to be celebrating someone else’s engagement when I want to be having my own celebrations for myself lol. My sister said ‘but you still can! You can literally do both’ But I just felt like it’s not the same, it’s not like your birthday falls on a Saturday every year and seeing as it does this year, I want to make the most of it. I really love birthdays, we dont have a lot of money and I never get to go away or buy myself things so we tend to make a big deal out of birthdays and make them really special for each other. And I was looking forward to doing something really good on the actual day of my birthday.

However I’m starting to feel a a bit selfish now and think I should go to my friends engagement party and just do my birthday celebrations some other time. What do you think? Would you think badly of your friend if she didn’t come to your engagement party on her birthday?

just to note, she isn’t my best friend. Our group only sees each other a couple of times a year. So it would be nice to see them all as the last time was almost a year ago. But at the same time we aren’t SUPER close

I’m not a mother and don’t plan to be, so I’ll never have a Mother’s Day.

Just to remind you in case you’ve misplaced them, on your other thread, you have 3 children.

I was a single mother of 3 when I met him…
They are 20, 17 and 13. The 20 year old doesn’t live at home anymore she lives in a house share. But the other two are still at home and my 17 year old will be going to uni

OP help me understand how your comment here I’m not a mother and don’t plan to be, so I’ll never have a Mother’s Day aligns with your posts above from other threads. Just trying to understand your real situation.

Fwiw I like birthdays and parties. So would squeeze the most I could into my life.

Hi @Sevensummers do yiu know what time the engagemrnt party is? If its in the evening, spend the day doing lovely stuff for your birthday, then top it offcwith the party. The followimg day go out and habe a lively sunday lunch sonewhere too.

I think you could fit both in but itll take a lot og energy.

Im with you about birthdays btw, they are the only day we get each year that is ours.

👀

OP you are not actually making sense. On previous thread you had split up from partner and have children Two still living at home.
On this thread you are going away with partner on your birthday and will never be a Mother and celebrate Mothers day. Just all very strange!

Completely with you, OP. My birthday is my day.

Have just said that !!🙄

@pizzaface23 well apparently one is 20 too and it's only going to be her 33rd birthday? 😂

The age doesn't stack up either, unless she had her pretend 20 year old when she was 13....

Haha cross post

It is creepy. You’re in your thirties. Do you need an annual day that others make all about you?

I’m far from miserable. Very content and loved. I also joyfully support my family and friends when they have life changing events.

You’re also lying in this thread or the other. Curious to know why.

Ah well OP, you’re rumbled. 0/10 for effort. Better luck next time 😜

Do what you want @Sevensummers It’s no one else’s business and I’m sure your friend won’t mind!

I can’t really understand getting excited about a September birthday in June. But I also don’t see why you’d have an engagement party (at least) 3 months after getting engaged. She could have planned the wedding by then.

Like a previous poster I’m also suspicious that it’s actually a fund raiser for the wedding. Especially if they’ve already set a date…..

Saw this too 🤣

12 when she gave birth, as the big, special 33rd isn’t until September

Suggestion for an interesting thread -

I was 12 when I had a baby. AMA.

I take it all back, she clearly needs to be indulged like a child on her birthday as she missed out on so much of childhood and all her teens having her children while still a child herself…

I find that so odd. If you were 13 fair enough..

@Sevensummers ahem...

Plot twist.....she is the daughter and mum's getting engaged on the daughter's 13th birthday.

Exactly. If this is going to be a big do with a large guest list then it’s bound to be someone’s birthday.

That said my sister in law got married on her nephew’s birthday, which was also her brother’s birthday and I thought that was rude.

I would 100% go and then have another weekend for my birthday, Whats not to love about being around people celebrating and then an extra weekend for your birthday. I would be more than happy to go to an actual wedding on my birthday tbh.

Last year I went to my friend’s DD’s 4th birthday party (her actual bday was two days later), followed by my Aunt’s 80th birthday party (her actual bday was three weeks earlier) on my birthday.

Ha! Sprung!

Best post ever!

If you don't already have plans for your birthday and want to go to your friend's engagement party, it honestly seems a bit ridiculous to me to refuse to go because it's your birthday. You can go out for dinner or go away for the weekend or whatever you want to do a different day and you may still even be able to find some time for you and your boyfriend that day. However if you don't want to go then don't go.