Am I about to make a huge financial mistake?

[MaryMaryVeryContrary]

DP and I have 2 children. Unmarried - he proposed but kids came along and can got kicked down the road. Didn’t see the urgency - I have my own career and money, but we keep meaning to as administratively it would tie up a few loose ends.

We have been together 8 years and after 1 year I rented out my flat and moved into his house. Tried to sell my flat during covid but no interest whatsoever so rented it out again. Now it is sold and the time has come to pool our cash and buy the family home we really want.

We found a property, got an offer on his house and all seemed to be going well. 1 week before exchange we discovered our plan - for me to contribute half the funds, and for him to take out a mortgage for the other half - isn’t viable as the bank won’t lend a mortgage to a person where another person jointly owns the property. Either we go on the mortgage together or nothing.

The issue is I have (paid off, from 2014) CCJ from an unpaid parking fine; and (believing I was sensible) have never had a credit card, so my credit rating is being refused for a mortgage.

I’ve been advised to give my (huge as an inheritance - 150k) deposit to DP, he then buys the house as a sole owner and I get a deed of trust to ‘protect my share’.

I feel everyone is trying to rush me into this and while I have an appointment with a solicitor next week, I would be really grateful for any input from others on what they would do. My gut tells me this isn’t a good idea.

Don't do it. The fact he has even suggested it is a huge red flag. He should know it's a terrible position to put you in, and should never have asked. Pull out of the purchase, put your money in a savings account, and if you really can't get a mortgage, then get married. At least you are then protected if you do buy a property together. Although I'd be massively questioning the future of the relationship at this point, given he seems to want to take your money.

Do not do this.

You're mad to ask (even more made to listen to) MN's for views when you're already booked in to see a solicitor.

No, no, no!
You need to approach a different lender. It's 50% LTV or less, so totally doable.
Go to a broker.

Am I the only one who completely trusts their husband? I've moved large amounts of money into his bank account before, he's put property into just my name, I've done similar. It didn't even think he might rip me off and I would never rip him off. Married 30 years.
I guess that might be the big difference though, the fact we're married.

I'd go and get some separate and independent legal advice

Of course the big difference is that you're married. The OP is not, she's in a completely different situation.

Whi advised you of that then? Was it your partner?

As long as it's all legally written up and signed by him I don't see the problem your 150 is protected plus any equity the house gains will be half yours aswell.

You could probably get married quite quickly

Loads of these things are easily solvable, getting a better broker and better mortgage rate, getting married, getting a credit card. Why are you making it such a drama instead of just sorting these things?

Indeed, I’m planning to send a float down the high street later with a banner saying ‘MY PARTNER WANTS ALL MY MONEY’

Does he have assets to match your 150k? Because the trouble is that if you get married then that money then becomes a joint asset. If you are currently in a better financial position than him then getting married may also be risky for you. My sister sadly lost her house after a short marriage to an abusive man who brought less to the marriage than she did. Marriage isn't always the safest thing for women who enter it with assets.

Get married.

Ok then!

Have you tried to go the mortgage yourself? My sister was in a similar position having a CCJ she didn't realise she had as she had paid the debt but not an admin charge that she wasn't aware of strangely. She was able to get a mortgage still.

Yes, being married means your assets are shared legally so doesn't matter too much whose name they're under.

Not at all the same situation as an unmarried person handing over £150K to a partner.

Interested to know who advised you to do this?

Surely if your CCJ was in 2014, it should be off your credit file by now?

I thought they lasted 6 years.

You need advice from professionals who have YOUR interests at the centre of there work. They need to put it in writing.
I was in a tangle a few years back and paid an Accountant for half an hour consultation. Money well spent.
Do not accept information that is filtered through DP's brain. Even if he is totally honest and lovely it will still be biased.
There is a way through all this but it should not be rushed and you need thinking time after being given information.

He's your husband. Therefore, regardless of trust you have a protection.

I can't imagine the lender would be happy for the property to have a £150k deed of trust attached on top of their mortgage so absolutely do not gift your £150k however... OP, if you get married your £150k investment becomes a marital asset so whilst it's protected if you get married your DH could make a claim for 50% of it in any case.

I would be contacting another broker ASAP. Your circumstances don't sound bad enough for you to refused a mortgage- particularly with such a large deposit.

OP, if you get married your £150k investment becomes a marital asset so whilst it's protected if you get married your DH could make a claim for 50% of it in any case.

This is why I wanted the joint ownership as an unmarried couple.

Having watched my mum be utterly shafted as an unmarried woman then my dad lavishing the cash on my stepmum after their split I told myself I would never end up like that

I don’t see it as unfair to DP as he earns twice as much as me - so it evens out. I have more equity, he earns twice as much. In the event of a split we would both be fine

Brilliant 😂

I wouldn't rush into anything. You could hand over your money, he cancels the sale then refuse to sign and he's got all your money.

It sounds like you have your head on your shoulders, and will not therefore be making a huge financial mistake. Independent legal advice, that you seek without your partner being involved, is definitely the best course of action.

It was a while back, but I was in a similar situation when I was young. I'd just finished uni, and we completed on a house a month before our wedding. We were moving to a new area with his work, so I was leaving my student job and looking for a proper job aiming to start once I had a house to live in. This was 22 years ago and a cheap area of a northern town, so the 10% deposit was £5k, and we put in half each (my half funded from a pub job on top of working full time in the uni holidays!)
I really didn't want to live in someone else's house but was essentially cobbling together 0 hours contracts. The calculations of what they would lend us were based on his loan but the lender was happy to have an extra person to hold liable! I don't see why others lenders wouldn't like that too!