Can't be bothered to meet friend -aibu?

[thisnoming]

Meeting a friend tomorrow and like normal it's me doing the travelling.
I don't drive either but it's a drinking day so makes no difference .
We are meeting in the town she lives in.
It's a 10 min taxi for her.
For me it's a 25 min bus into my city then 1 hour 15 min bus.
The taxi return would be over £100 so can't afford it.
We are meeting at 2
She's got a taxi booked for 1-45pm
I have to leave at 12pm
On the way home she is home in 10 mins and it's taking me 2 hours.
There's nothing really in between except little pubs.
Aibu to cancel?

As she CBA and you've only said you'd go as you're a" people pleaser"
Your mindset needs to change so make the decision and please yourself instead.
Cancel, and let the friendship fade out
Friendship is a two way street.
She siunds selfish and self absorbed

I hope I am wrong but I expect OP will go, have an awful time, be £100 plus out of pocket, update how SHE WILL NEVER DO IT AGAIN, and rinse and repeat in a few months time.

This is awful, both how she's treating you and why you're accepting it. Cancel tomorrow and phase her out. she doesn't care about spending time with you whereas you're making 4 hour round trips for her.

Morning she has agreed to get the train but asked me if il be at the platform waiting and walk her back to her train as she's not confident getting on the train.
That's fine tho as I don't mind that

Good well done. So it sounds like it’s a confidence issue rather than can’t be bothered.

Great. She sounds a bit delicate so I hope she goes easy on the booze.

Good - glad to be wrong 😁

Not confident in getting on the train as in being so knackered she wont be able to tell a train from a bus? Since OP said she was a heavy drinker I think Im right about this. Not wanting to be "that" person, I LOVE beer and red wine but being completely wasted that was in my twenties before having children. As a woman out alone at night its just dangerous to be so drunk. Once you put her in the train anything could happen to her! I would not be confortable leaving a friend like that. Try talking to her about drinking responsibly, she has a child at home who needs her. If you know she cant then Id say have a drinking feast with sleepover (either you at her place or she at yours). Have fun but please stay safe!

Do you think you could take the time to think what friendship means to you?

Why are you going to meet her? Was she important at some point in your life?

Why are you always travelling to meet her?

How do you feel after meeting her?

Obviously the effort of meeting is more than you want. So why do you even plan these things?

Not fair really to cancel so late. Next time she should travel to somewhere nearer to you. Or stay over at each other's house? Xx

I'm glad she compromised with the train
and also that you spoke up
I hope you enjoyed your time with your friend

2 hours to meet for a few hours? Nah. It’s a hotel stay or meet midway. Where do you and she live?

I might be wrong but to me sounds like she’s generally nervous about trains/travelling because she wants OP to be waiting for her at the platform when she meets her - and she’s obviously going to be sober at that point.

I had a friend like that in my 20s. She was very slim and had long blonde hair, blue eyes and looked extremely young and had a pretty girl next door look. This look or something about her apparently attracted a lot of predators /weird men so that was her reason for wanting to be met at platforms etc but it could be any number of reasons in this case. I know some people just aren’t confident with public transport.

I'm glad she agreed to come and meet you OP

You’ve posted this already!

I think you should go this time but just be honest and tell your freind you are finding the journey too much. Suggest' time about' in each others towns or meet halfway. That way you get to see each other and try different places. Good luck.

How did it go in the end OP? @thisnoming

Does she drive?
if so next time can’t she pick you up and bring you to her house before you go (and before she has a drink) that way you could both travel to the place you are going together

Can’t you stay at her house?

Yes, you are being unreasonable because surely, you knew all this before today. Perhaps you should have planned better or not arranged to meet?

"Today"? You mean 4 days before you posted 😂