Eww just found out my fiance voted UKIP before

[NotGotAClue1]

Just that really. And the fact that he likes Nigel Farage and agrees with him. I feel very disturbed.

Yawn.

Always the same, if you’re not wealthy and espouse socialism, you’re a layabout and looking for handouts.

If you have wealth and espouse socialism, then you’re a hypocrite and not really a socialist at all.

You’ve advanced or celebrated both of these views on this thread. It’s almost as if you’re just not an honest person.

Some interesting comments. I’m still no clearer what to think or do.

I agree with this.

You say you knew he was a Tory but didn’t realise quite how far over he is. So it’s a reasonable assumption that he wasn’t attending Tommy Robinson marches every weekend or harassing the homeless every time he walked past? He didn’t say or do anything that made you think he was a terrible person, before you had a child with him? Has he now suddenly started saying or doing terrible things? Or has he just expressed an opinion that isn’t the same as yours? Because if that is seriously what you’re considering breaking up your DC’s otherwise happy home over, then I’d say your partner is not the only one whose moral compass needs examining. You’re an adult and you’re responsible for the wellbeing and happiness of a child. And you’re using words like ‘eww’ just because your partner doesn’t think identically to you? I think you need to grow up. And quickly.

There’s a worrying trend of branding anyone who thinks differently, as an evil bigot and insisting that they don’t have a right to express their views (obviously within the bounds of the law) simply because they have opinions that are different from theirs. Doesn’t it terrify anyone that some people (who usually think of themselves as liberal and open minded and inclusive) want a society akin to North Korea, where only approved opinions are accepted and everyone else should be denied a voice and have ridicule and scorn poured on them? It’s like listening to a militant toddler. No sense of reason or compromise or willingness to debate. And it’s this attitude that is driving people to support that bloody awful man in droves; because if they dare express their opinions anywhere else, they’re shouted down and told that they’re thick racists.

You still haven’t clarified how you’ve got to being engaged and having a two year old with someone you had no idea was a twat

There are lots of things, including political points of view, that I’m more than happy to tolerate in others but I’d find extremely undesirable in a partner.

Nobody is obligated to find someone else attractive.

@Whothefuckdoesthat excellent post.

If he knows your views he probably wouldn't tell you.

Funnily enough, the BNP was also in favour of National Service

I completely agree with you. And if she’d just met him and was considering a relationship, or if he’d suddenly changed from a liberal into a militant right winger, then I’d be advising her to cut her losses and head for the hills. But she doesn’t say that anything has changed other than he has different opinions to her. There’s a beautiful and innocent little two year old involved in this, whose life is about to implode simply because his mother couldn’t be arsed to discuss political opinions prior to setting up home and starting a family. Which is a fucking irresponsible thing to do if politics is a deal breaker.

One of the first things I talked with DH about when we started dating was his political views. I think if 2 people have opposite views it would make for a difficult relationship.

👏👏👏👏

I think it sounds like this is part of a bigger picture for you. Do you think it might be the straw that broke the camels back? I would find it hard to be with someone who held very different values to mine. In fact common values and our kids are the reasons we're still together despite many other issues.

I could accept political differences and being a labour voter myself I actually have mostly tory friends which is fine but I couldn’t be close to someone who supported farage because of what he stands for (mostly himself) and the stupidity involved in thinking farage is actually a genuine politician worthy of the title.

Yeah you should be disturbed and to be honest, I'd leave him unless you both have a similar IQ and/or leanings.

You'd have to be an idiot to vote for UKIP - regardless of their perceived racism and lack of governance experience, the fact that he was voting for a party on the basis that it has just one main goal is utter stupidity and completely short sighted.

None of your business.

Yes, I would marry someone who votes tory. I have done. And the bigot reference was in response to the person who assumed labour voters were dead beats and had no aspirations. Funny given that you wouldn't become a politition (regardless of political sways) if you weren't aspirational in the first place. To assume all Labour voters are dead beats and don't have aspirations is wrong.

I took a while to realise ex was a relationship chameleon - I’m leftwing and he definitely purposely led me to believe he had similar beliefs. I discovered he thinks Farage is great when I unexpectedly came across a photo of them together, Farage gladhanding and ex grinning. Over time, ex stopped bothering to hide his true self, and I am very glad I no longer have such a bigot in my or my children’s home.

Maybe the OP didn’t plan to get pregnant and have a family with this man but has tried to make it work (but, obviously, it isn’t working for her - she said she’d likely have left by now if it wasn’t for their child).

Or maybe the OP has become more politically aware over the last few years - people change.

I agree that it would be bizarre to go into a serious relationship, viewing politics as a deal breaker from the off, and not first discuss politics with your potential partner, but who knows how OP and her relationship have developed.

I really don't have an issue with people having different views or political leanings.

I’m about to vote for Nigel myself.

The political party we vote for doesn’t make us bad people. I have a lot of respect for others regardless of which party they pencil a tick next to. If I disagree with someone over a political issue, I tend just to not engage. Everyone has a right to their own view. And that includes me.

A partner voting for Nigel wouldn’t bother me at all. Just as a partner voting for Kier wouldn’t.

I do see where you’re coming from and without the OP clarifying things, we could be making assumptions, but she said ‘he treats me nicely in our relationship but his views kind of make me not like him as a person. We have a 2 year old. If we didn’t, I think I would have ended things by now’. As she says she’s only just discovered his views, it doesn’t sound like she’s been disliking him for any significant period of time and she doesn’t suggest any other issues that she’s had to work through. So what has changed? Other than him having a different opinion to her? She doesn’t suggest he’s acting differently, or voicing his political opinions in front of their friends and family. As she says she can’t gain any more from talking to him, is she even certain she knows exactly what his political opinions are? Or is she just assuming that he’s clearly a monster because Farage = the devil incarnate? Because that would be really childish and irresponsible when you have DC to consider.

@DistinDistinguishedSocialCommentator I don't know where you have got Keir is worth £12 million from, but he isn't worth that. He doesn't come from money either.

This link explains what he has and hasn't included what he has paid in taxes, which he released by choice.

His house is worth more than a million yes, cos he lives in London. Happy reading 😊

www.politics.co.uk/reference/sir-keir-starmers-net-worth/#:~:text=His%20father%2C%20Rodney%20Starmer%2C%20was,multi%20million%20pound%20net%20worth.

Repulsive. Dump him.

I always think that a lot of people who vote like this, it's a protest vote because they're so fed up with politicians in general.

Wouldn’t bother me in the slightest. I can’t imagine surrounding myself with only people who completely agreed with me on everything.
You can disagree and still love people, you don’t have to take everything personally.