What's your cautionary tale?

[BrightInMyNorthernSky]

Having just got through the most stressful week ever due to a nightmare situation of my own making, I thought I would share a previous and current cautionary tale.

1. Always remember to change the address on your V5 and not just your license. I didn't. DH got caught speeding twice on the same day on the same stretch of road (33 in a 30) in my car. Both fines went to old address. Didn't answer them, obvs. The whole sorry mess played out without me being aware and by the time it all caught up with me it was had been banned from driving for six months and fined £2k - five months earlier! So had been driving while banned for five months!!!

Just because you can’t get to sleep at 01:30 on a Sunday night, don’t decide to cancel the hotel booking you made months ago for your summer holiday because you think you’ve found a better deal.

The better deal price is for 2 nights when the original booking was for 3 nights!!

(Yes, I’ve literally just done this and had to fork out an extra £200 for the 3rd night 🤬🤬🤬)

Set up an MOT reminder on the website
I see so many people driving without an MOT, some for years

When making fresh chicken stock, drain and store immediately.

Do not store overnight in the fridge and do it the day after. Cos then you end up with chicken carcass jelly. And have to heat it up again to separate.

Nice! 😒

Once a cheater always a cheater

Don't underestimate the possibility and prevalence of hereditary personality and cognitive traits when considering procreation. DC's dad is definitely an acquired taste with some peculiar quirks which, when initially dating, seemed charmingly idiosyncratic at best and, on reflection, at worst constitute a life-time of struggle. One DC has inherited many of these (definitely nature as opposed to nurture) and their life is so much harder for it.

Know the signs of sepsis and trust your instincts to push for a test in hospital (or now use Martha’s rule - check the list to see if your local hospital has signed up to it, and put the number for the helpline in your phone).

When making chicken stock, do not carefully strain the liquid and chuck it down the sink, leaving yourself with a well-drained mess of boiled chicken bones and no stock 😂 I've done this so many times. I just don't bother with it any more.

Your mortgage insurance, critical illness insurance, income protection and so on have MASSIVE exclusion clauses and riders. They don't keep you safe. If you do manage to get them to pay out, they'll find reasons to stop paying within 18 months or less.

I ended up having to sell my flat for the outstanding amount. I honestly thought I'd taken all necessary precautions.

Don’t let your partner engage in any kind of anal play if they’ve been chopping chilis in the last few hours

Ouch, @Fudgetheparrot 😂🌶

NEVER assume that your toxic narcissist MIL made appropriate arrangements for absolutely anything at all when they inherited a large sum of money.

Also never take the advice of medical staff when they tell you how long someone with an inoperable brain tumour has left to live. They will be wildly wrong.

The above two things may be linked)

@Chocolatepeanutbuttercupsandicecream

Don’t accept the google log in notification thingy if you’re not 100% sure it’s actually you (ds learned that one the hard way recently).

Sorry - what is this please? 🌹

Garlicker· Today 03:15

When making chicken stock, do not carefully strain the liquid and chuck it down the sink, leaving yourself with a well-drained mess of boiled chicken bones and no stock

Was it you who posted that last year? When I said I'd just don't exactly the same thing...

Don't know, @SinnerBoy, but you have my sympathy!

Thanks - and you mine!

Never walk on a hotel room carpet in bare feet, always use slipper socks/slippers.

Trust your gut when it comes to keeping safe and always cross the street several times if you feel unsure about someone following behind you.

Love and hate are two sides of the same coin, indifference is the goal during and after difficult times.

Meet anyone with dependencies? Run for the hills rather than let them waste your life aswell as their own. They won't change.

Accept that your parents are just people and not some saintly being just because they are older, they are flawed too.

Keep your face and hands out of the sun.

Don't spend time engaging with idiots, they are a lost cause.

If you need to exit a relationship which is volatile, do the prep work first very carefully. Make use of empty meeting rooms at work for lunchtime sessions of phone calls and messages to get your ducks in a row. Keep a coded notebook of all the things you need to do at work and plough through it every day. Make a timeline so you can see a clear end date you'll be out by and focus on that but dig deep if you have to push it back and play whatever role at home you have to play to keep yourself safe until then.

Thank your friends and family who stand by you in the tough times, don't take them for granted. They're not mindreaders and need to be appreciated.

Love, and let yourself be loved.

Op,

You can go to court and get the case revoked and resentenced. You can apply to say that you did not receive the correspondence and was not the named driver. You do not need to accept the ban or the fine. You can go to court, swear on oath and explain the circumstances- the bench will amend the charge. Please do so as soon as possible. You are effectively being punished without good reason.

Yes we should update the DVLA etc when we move, but it’s not unusual for drivers to forget.

Silent shagging is a myth. Wait until you have the house to yourself.

When returning a hire car remember too organise transport from the car hire centre.

*to

In relationships put looks to one side or your view of attraction. If a man is thoughtful, intelligent, funny and seems compatible and interesting on paper - give me a date - just one and be open.

I turned up and he wasn’t drop dead gorgeous but he wasn’t errr no he’s dire either. We went for a dog walk and a cup of tea. Conversation was following and he seemed totally lovely. He was so respectful. Offered a hug at the end of the date and went on date two. Meanwhile his voice, humour, honestly, kindness and values kept shining through. He was clean and smart- very intelligent and a warm and funny man. Messages were lovely. Date 2, was lovely and longer. It was a slow burn.

When we did kiss it was wow and I had feelings by then. By the time we had sex, he blew my mind (best sex of my life) but he is as stable as a rock. He doesn’t just say stuff he does it. He plans dates - still. He is as polite today as he was at the start of dating. That’s him.

For me I’m just impressed that I finally watched how someone treated others and me rather than the lust feelings at the start.

Not me but my very elderly grandmother. Kept all her medicines and first aid bits in an ice cream container in her cupboard. All tubes look the same and sometimes thrush ointment has the same colour labels as Deep Heat. She said “Ooooh, it made me hop!”

Don’t bother paying for terminal illness cover with life insurance. The insurer will go out of their way to not pay. I am half expecting them to dispute the fact he’s dead when the time comes.

also don’t mistake insect repellent cream for toothpaste

Do not add tea tree oil to your bath unless you want to burn your skin. Luckily, I had the wherewithal to begin vigorously washing it off with lots of soap. 😬