Instrumental teacher refusing to teach my child

[MairSS]

I just cannot believe the email I’ve just received from my child’s instrumental teacher!
DS has been receiving instrumental lessons at school for a couple of terms. The music teacher is freelance and therefore parents pay fees directly to her.
We pay up front each half term. She invoices us. I had overpaid by one lesson last time, and she had not realised this. I therefore sent her a message telling her to check her account. She immediately did and apologised saying she had not realised and adjusted the invoice accordingly. I wrote another message saying that in fact I always pay on time and didn’t appreciate getting messages saying I hadn’t paid when I had.
She then said on reflection it may be better if I found an alternative teacher as she doesn’t tolerate rudeness and reattached her terms and conditions!
surely she can’t do this? How unprofessional! I’ll be making an appointment to see the headteacher on Monday!

@MairSS you're at it.

Thingsthatgo too true. I used to be freelance with much less opportunity to pick and choose my clients.

A freelancer who can just say 'see you then' to rudeness has warmed the cockles of my heart.

She’s not your indentured servant - that may be why she doesn’t have to continue. The people who have any attitude of entitlement when it comes to paid services are always going to struggle with others finding them obnoxious. It’s a real shame for your child and hopefully he grows up learning from your bad behaviour OP. That’s the silver lining!

Why can’t she just move on and continue to do her job which we pay for???

Why indeed?

You really have no idea?

Unfortunately your child does not have the contract with the teacher , you do and if the teacher no longer wants to deal with you then that is her prerogative. I’m with the teacher , you were rude in what you said after she had simply made a mistake and corrected it . Find a different teacher and adjust your attitude .

OP, your style of writing is quite aggressive, which is very off putting.

Teacher will know from experience that parents like you will never be happy and will be a lot of hassle. That is why she has dropped you child.

Think about how you will be perceived next time. These relationships are a two way thing. It is not just money orientated.
Nobody wants to deal with rude or aggressive parents.

Yes, you could try apologising profusely for your rudeness and see if she changes her mind.

Not sensing that's your vibe though, but would be happy to be proved wrong.

Hmmmmm. On another thread you’ve worked as a peripatetic in primaries for years, and don’t like a snobbish head of music - which kind of suggests your area is music. Intriguing that your OP didn’t reference what your own approach would be given your similarity in career with this teacher…

Oh well. From your 25 years I’m sure you’ve made plenty of contacts for alternative music teachers. Not sure where you’ll find someone to teach your child manners though 😉

Hahaha serves you right. Tell your kid why he can't have his violin lessons anymore so he can learn that being a rude dick doesn't get you anywhere.

Goodness. You really don't see why she no longer wants your custom.

😂

She doesn't want your money now so doesn't have to deliver anything.

Tbh if you come across to her as you here she's dodged a bullet terminating your contract

As someone who used to do a similar job, not teaching music but comparable, I am totally with the teacher here.

You pointed out a mistake, she apologised and sorted it. Then you got rude. Why should she want to continue teaching your child? There is plenty of freelance work out there, teachers can generally pick and choose. They do not have time for arsey parents.

The head teacher will not be interested or have any control over this. You cannot "expect" that your precious child has lessons. Find him another teacher or another hobby. Tell him mummy was rude, don't let him think the teacher is letting him down or does not want to see him.

I have sacked pupils in the past because they had parents like you. Learn a bit of humility and move on.

I think you were rude but I also think she over reacted. If she doesn't want to teach your child because of you that's up to her though.

You should have thought of your child before you were so rude. Don't blame her either!

Ok I was rude. I’m not accepting this is over though. I won’t give her my bank details and so she can’t refund me. I will send DS in on Tuesday with his violin for his lesson

And she’ll send him back again, minus violin

You don’t want your child to miss out? Then don’t be rude.

Have you apologised to her for your rudeness, @MairSS? Because, make no mistake, you were rude.

Basically, she does not have to teach your child if she doesn’t want to - and you have no right to hang on to the violin she has lent you.

Wow you are something op. Using your child like this

You were rude and now it's come back on your child - that's unfair but you need to learn a lesson.

“I pay for lessons and expect them to be delivered”

Which is exactly what she has done, she has delivered all the lessons she was contracted to deliver. The fact is it was your error of overpaying for an additional lesson that was not in the schedule that has caused this ridiculous situation. You made a mistake, she rectified it with alacrity and grace when you pointed out your mistake, you then waded in with your size nines and tried to blame her for not spotting your mistake before you did.

Nobody who is self-employed has to do anything, including teaching the spoilt child of an entitled parent. She’s chosen not to continue to teach your child because of your passive-aggressive behaviour. A mistake was made but she rectified it so it should have been left at that. This is totally on you and your actions I’m afraid. It’s your choice not to accept a refund but that is precisely the behaviour that she shouldn’t have to deal with

What an awful and entitled attitude. Your poor child.

So you are hoping that her kindness will win out and she will teach your son so as not to disappoint him?

But you still get to go through life being an arse?

And this attitude shows the reason why she has cancelled your contract . She will just take her violin back on Tuesday and hand your son an envelope with the refund in it.

im sure there are plenty children wanting violin lessons on her waiting list.

school will do nothing to help as you pay her direct. Good luck with the complaint!