To push ds into claiming

[Lacky301]

Ds has just finished uni and never worked through me and ex dp give him £450 a month between us plus I've always bought him the odd thing and gave a bit extra here and there.
Me and his dad are seperated and his dads just received notification that he will now be charged full council tax as ds has finished uni I'm under strain financially. I've told ds he needs to claim universal credit until he finds a job but he keeps saying I want my results first. Am I wrong in pushing him to claim to take some pressure off me and dp. Fwiw he would get around £370 per month as living at home.

The way some react to people claiming benefits. I am sure you would too if that were the situation you were in.

Ok, I shall rephrase that... loads of students in the late 90's in Leeds used to sign on between jobs and studies. Not ALL. I apologise for trying to be a little lighthearted.

Lol no. I've been between good employment before, and I made up the shortfall with whatever temp jobs I could get my hands on. Didn't even cross my mind to apply for UC or JSA. I kept numerous part time jobs on the go throughout my time at uni (call centre/pub/babysitting/tutoring/admin/mystery shopping/volunteering for paid experiments etc.) and kept some of those on as a weekend job even in paid employment so I have a fallback if needed (which came in useful when one company filed for liquidation and I ended up redundant).

I have no qualms with someone claiming UC if their actual circumstances mean that they can't work, but to have someone not even try and then get encouraged to claim because of their own laziness/incompetence does make me angry.

Would I claim benefits when I am capable and able to work? No
Would I sit on my back side not working whilst waiting for the results of my course? No
Would I need time to write my CV to enable me to look for work? Yes, I would need a maximum 2 hours

why don’t we all just not work and claim benefits?

Capable and able to work is not the same as being offered a job.

Even being offered a job is not the same as having a job.

dd was offered a couple of jobs. None materialised. These were from UC job fairs.

It would take you 2 hrs to get a new job, employment contract all signed?

Really, the jobseeker part of UC is a small £ payment weekly while a person is between jobs and actively looking for work. It’s not choosing a life on benefits.

Sounds like a you issue. We have job seekers allowance for those seeking jobs. If you don’t want to claim it out of misplaced then that is your decision. It doesn’t mean people should not claim the allowance that we have for them as a civilised society.

Also, some jobs need a DBS, and they can take months to come back.

He isn't seeking a job.
He is waiting for results but in the meantime mum wants him to claim UC

Most casual summer jobs don't require a DBS check. They also pay at least, or above minimum wage. I've hired 5 students this week at £11.35 an hour plus tips, next day start.

I know. My degree was in primary teaching. 9-4 each day in uni and on placement I would be working each day from 7am until midnight some nights. It was awful. Unfortunately I didn’t have rich parents and so had to work every weekend too to survive. After my degree finished in the June, I had to work. Getting hundreds of pounds from parents wasn’t an option and I never even considered claiming benefits as an option instead of working when I was a healthy and able young adult.

That was you. We are all different, and some people can't manage so many demands.

I couldn't. I burnt out in spectacular fashion during my stint on my course... and I was not even working.

OP has said she needs the money if her son claims UC as she is struggling herself.

I'm appalled that you would advise your son to try and claim benefits rather than get a summer/part time job. Everyone I know would be so embarrassed to look to the state for a hand out rather than stack a shelf or pull a pint.

What do you do to contribute to society by the way???

Benefits are there for people between jobs. OP's son would be doing nothing wrong by claiming whilst he is looking. That is literally what it is there for.

He's not between jobs, he's never had one!!!

No one had one, until they did.... and some claimed up to then. Nothing wrong with that as you can't live off air.

He's not looking, and hasn't been. Because his parents have been sending him £450 a month on top of student finance. I have no issue with paying tax to provide benefits for those who need it, this 21 year old for and able student does not need it!!!!

You can't live off air, but it seems his parents provide it whilst he wafts around, why the fuck should the tax payer???

OP has been sending him money, and is now feeling the pinch. Yes, he is 21... an adult. OP owes him nothing in that regard. But she is now not able to do that anymore.
How do you know he is able? From what OP has been posting, it sounds like he is unsure as to whether he has passed his course or not. He must be in knots right now. I have gone to uni and fucked it up... and it I felt awful... a total shame to my family too. Don't underestimate how OP's son might be feeling right now.

I also dropped out of uni, due to a rape and mental health crisis. You know what I didn't do? Claim benefits. I got a bar job and saw a doctor and my parents also gave me the option of having a room in my home town, as the OP could provide. I never, ever, expected to take money from the state so I could "take time out to relax" and I had had a fucking terrible time, btw.

Even in my darkest darkest days I wouldn't expect my parents to bankroll me, or even worse, expect the state to bankroll me, because I'd had a tough time. (And the OPs son hasn't even had a bad time, he's just been bankrolled for years)
I have no problem with benefits for those who need it. This person doesn't need it, and I'm appalled he thinks it's ok to ask?

I had no choice but to manage if I wanted to pay for my car and my course.

OP has not mentioned her son is suffering from burn out or from any mental health conditions so most posters have presumed he is healthy and well as she would have said otherwise.

Even if he is worrying about his results like many many students will be right now- he can still get a job! I’m not even saying he needs a full time one but bloody hell, he should have had a job by the time he is 21 and not relied on hundreds of pounds every month from his mum.

Oh, so you managed so that means everyone else can?
Good for you... and I am not going to let you make me feel like utter shit for not coping, because there is no trauma Olympics, and I am not going to let you compare yourself to me.

I don't know why you are getting so defensive here @XenoBitch, like I said, I have my own mental health struggles and am more than willing to contribute to the welfare state for those who need it (even though, when I did, it was my family who supported me)

This 21 year old able bodied spoilt child should not be in receipt of benefits. I don't know anything about your circumstances, but I choose to believe you do deserve them, otherwise you wouldn't be so vocal about it here. Maybe consider how tough it is for
Those with mental health struggles but who aren't "entitled" to any benefits to see those who are be so disrespectful. And maybe don't throw insults at them for dealing with it differently to you!!

He will barely get much anyway so no need to froth at the mouth.