To wonder what’s the point when I’m left with this after bills?

[ReLOa]

In a stressful job and single parent to nursery age child. I have 570 left after all bills and childcare and petrol, excluding food. What is the actual point in this?! We can’t do much at weekends and holidays are out of the question. I’m supposedly in a highly paid job (earn 70k) and I feel like giving up. Just been paid and looking ahead at the month I’ve already had to turn down some things like an adventure park day with friends as it was 28 pounds entry and a 35 mile round trip. I feel like I’m failing yet not sure what more I can possibly do?!

70k is a decent salary, I can only assume nursery fees/ mortgage payments are high.

Nursery isn't forever and at some point you will own a house so that's the point I guess.

Children are expensive, but the childcare costs are short term . Have you looked at where you can save money? Do you not get any child maintenance?

I’m assuming it’s nursery fees that’s costing a lot? It’s only temporary, wrap around care for school is usually much cheaper. Most of us have a lot less money during the nursery years compared to when they go to school.

How old are the children? The early years can be very tight financially paying for full time nursery.

What’s the situation with the father? Is he paying maintenance?

Grabs bag of popcorn

Another thread on MN where someone on a higher salary is saying they can't manage.

OP prepare to be bombarded with posts telling you how to make one chicken last a week and to turn down your heating.

Honestly I'm sure you'll be fine. Just look at you regular outgoings and see if anything can be reduced - but If I have £570 left after paying out all my bills I'd be ok.

I know it feels hard at the stage where you’re paying hundreds on nursery but before you know it things lighten. How much do you spend on food a month?
I save money by buying clothes on Vinted and find places where you buy a ticket that is then valid for a year which quite a few places do so £30 for a couple of tickets gives us several visits

£570 per month for food and fun is loads OP! If you can't manage on that then I wonder if you're doing it wrong?!

Yes you'll want to avoid days out that cost £££ all the time, but that's a huge amount of fun and food money.

570 left after all bills is pretty good. You earn double the national earnings. Nursery lasts only a short while, then it should get easier.

Something else must be eating into that £570 as you make it sound like that's just for food?

Surely with that left for food £30 for a day out isn't going to be unaffordable?

£570 isn’t much tbf to op. That’s got to included food, petrol and essentials still.

£100 a week food nowadays (£400)

Leaves £170 for all petrol, transport costs, replacing anything broken, fixing things in house, kids and adults essentials, outgrown clothing, entry fees, etc.

Once you are finished paying nursery fees you will be fine, and if you are talking adventure parks your child must be coming up to school age?

Likewise with mortgages they get easier with time, and you gradually have more money. On 70k you will be comfortable in the long run.

£570 for food for one adult and a small child

so how much of that will you spend on food ?

and yes you could afford a holiday, tho you may have to manage your expectations as to what type of holiday it would be.

I know how you feel family of 5 I work part time and he works full time collectively we bring in around £50k a year (significantly less than you)

and we can't afford a holiday, days our are few and far between, my partners wage is gone the day it comes, our disposable income After everything is paid Including food and petrol is £140 a week. And I know it dosnt seem that bad but going to the shop for cleaning bits and whatnot and it's £40

we really have to think about every penny we spend and it's exhausting

She's already included petrol. It's £570 for food and fun for two people. If child is in nursery full time, it's basically teas and weekends.

I'm just looking for my violin.

Just two of them though so good can be a lot less than £100 a week, we spend that for a family of 4 including a fussy toddler and a baby on formula plus all the nappies.

£570 gets nibbled away pretty easily between food and birthdays and unavoidable stuff, but it is just for a few years.

You have a car, mortgage and job paying well over most people's, can cover gas, electricity, council tax, phone, internet, repairs, insurance, pension, food, clothing and everything else (except overpriced theme park visits and expensive holidays).

It'll be fine - and you'll be sitting on a significant asset at the end of it.

You must have quite significant out goings to have so little left at the end of the month? Debt?

Except that it’s not really just food and fun: it’s that plus laundry and cleaning products, nappies, birthday and Christmas presents, clothing and shoes, the odd haircut, replacing odds and ends in the home, occasional travel to visit family. And having less than than £150 a week for all of that doesn’t then leave much in the way for saving anything for emergencies. Just because somebody isn’t going to be knocking at the doors of the food bank doesn’t mean they’re deserving of mockery.

Nursery 1,600 and mortgage 900!

This. Not really a problem.

£4200 take home pay

£1600 nursery (which will end soon)
£900 mortgage (which gives you an expensive asset)

Leaves £1700 for bills and food. Which is most people's take home pay.

£570 for food and fun isn't a lot at all.. it's about £140 a week. Also being a single parent you have to pay for EVERYTHING on your own...
I completely see and hear you OP. I am a single parent, albeit much lower earner but I too have a very low weekly budget. I'm trying my best to be happy doing less... but it's tough. Just know you aren't alone ❤️

70k is a good dual income so I can't see why you can't afford any treats on that salary

How old is your child? Nursery should go down with funded hours or end altogether at school age. Are you planning on state education or independent for your child? If state, this is a short term issue as wraparound care will be considerably cheaper than nursery fees.

So when nursery finishes you’ll have at least £1k more a month even if wrap around is £600 (likely to be less). You’re in a very good position.