Changing the bed linen in between guests staying over

[userloadsofnumbers]

I am going to try and write this as factually as possible. We have a lot of people staying over for various reasons. Partner A thinks the bed linen needs to be washed in between every guest, even if they've just slept in the bed for one night/a few hours. Partner B thinks that is unnecessary and doesn't have to be done every time.

Partner A also feels the house should be generally tidied before guests come over - stuff put away, surfaces wiped, plates/cups etc in the dishwasher instead of piled high next to the sink. Again, Partner B disagrees.

Partner A thinks 99% of people think like they do. Partner B says their parents and sister agree with them so Partner A is the weird one and has issues surrounding guests visiting.

So - who is being unreasonable?

Poll: YANBU - if you agree with Partner A
YABU - if you agree with Partner B

Partner B is a total pig.

What kind of animals don't wash bedlinen between guests?

Of course you need to change the bed for each visitor, disgusting to think otherwise and yes a general degree of tidiness too.

Of course it needs washing 🤮

It needs washing

Partner A is right. The idea of sleeping in someone else's dirty sheets is grim. And I would always tidy before visitors.

Exactly this

Of course it all needs changing and tidying. I wouldn't want to sleep in someone else's used sheets. Gross 🤮

Definitely needs to be washed. If it's just been a few hours of sleep, a quick wash will be fine.

The only time this would not happen is with very close relatives eg me, my mum and sister. So my sis stays over one night and my mum the next. I’d say, DSis has used the bed so my mum would say don’t change the bed for me (as previous occupant is her own child). I’d expect the same at my mum’s - if my sister had used the bed I wouldn’t expect or need it to be changed. Unless very hot weather etc. But for anyone else, of course I would change between visitors.

Changing bed and cleaning kitchen and bathroom between guests is the norm.

Depends on the guests. If my mum came over, then my sister I might not change the bedding.

If the guests are coming in quick succession and you felt it better they had clean I'd probably put a top sheet under the duvet so I didn't have change the whole duvet cover. I'd probably change pillowcases.

If there was time between guests I'd probably put fresh on.

I would make sure it was tidy but wouldn't worry about that days washing up if it was on the side after a recent meal.

With some very rare exceptions (I don't mind sleeping in a bed my sister or mother has slept in and vice versa) absolutely yes, changing bedlinen and towels between guests is an absolute given.

Tidiness levels are variable, but I would at the very least do the dishes and run the hoover over the obvious bits.

Urgh no I would be horrified if bedding wasn't changed!!!
Cleaning depends how well you know the guests, house should be generally tidy and bathrooms clean but I don't think a few plates next to the dishwasher is the end of the world, people need to accept they're coming to stay in a family home not a hotel.

If you can’t wash and change the bed linen tell the guests to bring their own including a mattress protector and pillow case. When my kids have friends round to stay I say ask them to bring a sleeping bag, bed sheets, pillow and pillowcase and a towel.

My word, I can’t believe anyone would think that not changing the sheets is acceptable.

Whilst partner A sounds nice I really hope you aren’t the friends we are staying with soon!!

The only time bedlinen has not been changed between guests in our house was when the dc were older teens/young adults and they would occasionally bring a friend home unannounced and we were already in bed. Some of the boys would just say "it's fine" and get straight in. The girls were generally happy to wait to have the linen changed.

Not changing the linen is gross. A quick tidy is also normal.

This!

100% A is correct

Team Partner A

I would not want to stay with Partner B. They are gross beyond words and sound bone idle too.

I'm a total slattern by many MN cleaning standards and even I think not changing the before between guests is awful.

Bed - yes
Cleaning kitchen - not necessarily, it is a home where people live in, dishes can be put into the dishwasher later when they would normally be put there

If you have many guests, you either need a cleaner or decide to not aspire on full special guest treatment and see them as just another person in the household

I was going to write pretty much this.

Ask people to bring their own bedding if you don't want to sort it.

I'm partner A and DH is partner B...

We're in same situ at the moment and had guests 1 last week, guests 2 this weekend and guests 1 again next week, so I've taken the sheets off the bed and changed them but stored them to put them back on after guests 2 have left.

I'll air the bed between changes and the room, the room will be wiped down and bathroom cleaned.

It is a bit time consuming but I wouldn't not do it!

Of course bedding needs changing and a general tidy up is needed!
I hate my MIL so when she stays I’d love to not change the bedding but even then I still do!