To think he's going on a date?

[Everybodystalkingallthisstuffaboutme]

I've been on a date with someone from work, but he's gone a bit funny and I haven't bothered asking for another one, if he wants to he will.

He's someone who doesn't like people talking during films (which is understandable) so usually goes alone.

I invited him to my belated birthday party tomorrow, admittedly I invited him with late notice but he's said he's 'catching up with a friend from an old job.'

I casually asked where they were going and he said 'the cinema'.

Do men go to the cinema in pairs?
I just have this feeling he's trying to date this 'friend'. It could well be innocent or a male but I'm not convinced.

Anyway I'm better just binning him off. I know he's entitled to do what he pleases, it just hurts a bit.

I shouldn't care but it's really hurting me.

What!? Of course men go to the cinema in pairs. Perhaps his friend asked him and he simply agreed. You are majorly overreacting to be hurt by this.

Him wanting or not wanting to date you further is a completely separate issue.

Yes, men do sometimes go to the cinema in pairs 😂

As for binning him off - what are you binning off? You had one date and nothing else happened.

I'm probably being paranoid but I've managed to convince myself it's a date. This 'friend' from his last job.
I want to find out without making it obvious. I know I'm being ridiculous but this is how I feel.

And yes there's nothing to bin off as such, more just stop communicating with him.

Yes we go to the cinema in pairs sometimes

its none of your business what he’s doing. You’ve been on one bloody date!

He came to my workplace on loan and there was a time when he was meant to go back but it kept getting extended, however now he's permanent at ours. I bet now he's found out he's not going back he's been messaging her and trying to date.

If you really like this guy, you need to reel it back a bit and try to calm the paranoia.
Asking probing questions about a potentially innocent trip to the cinema with a friend isn't going to show off your best side.

It's just rubbish how he's found someone else so quickly, if it is that. Probably always had her lined up.
I know it doesn't look good, I just want to know for my own sanity so I can move on.

Even if he was going on a date, you guys only went out once - he doesn't owe you anything.

The only way getting to know is to find out the film, time and location, then buy some dark glasses, a hat and a coat with a big collar.

Moving on means not having to know. Work on the moving on part.

OP, read your first two sentences back. It's paranoia on steroids.

I know he doesn't owe me anything. However I'm sure you can understand it's a bit hurtful when you thought someone liked you and then they've got someone else literally a fortnight later. Moving on won't happen immediately sadly.

I think you're being a bit intense.

You went on one date then neither of you bothered again.

I know it looks that way but my instincts have usually been correct, plus this is how some men operate sadly.

You've been on one date.

You're sounding nuts.

You dont know it's a her
I mean this kindly but you have been on one date, if you want to go on another ask him,
Or don't, sometimes things just don't work out and it's no reflection on you as a person.

Oh well, if I'm nuts, so be it.
The speed in which he's got another woman is mad, and hurts. I am sure it is a date.

If I’ve read this correctly, you went on one date and it wasn’t a success as he isn’t keen to have another one. He is now going to the cinema with his male friend, like lots of men do, and you sound as if you are viewing this as an act of infidelity despite the fact you weren’t in a relationship and there is no reason to think he is going on a date.

Even if it is a date, he didn't "find someone else so quickly," OP.

You went on a date. One. That's not a relationship, that's an evening. He can't find "someone else" if he wasn't with you in the first place.

You will look like a crazy person if you keep obsessing about this. Neither of you owe the other anything. Just write it off as a pleasant evening and nothng more, and get on with your life.

Christ op, the red flags are waving strongly here. You’re being utterly ridiculous. You went on one date and that was it. One. Date.

He didn't mention whether it's a man or woman, just said 'a friend from an old job '. If it is totally innocent then yes I'll feel stupid, but I just wish I could know.

What do you mean "got another woman?"

You never had him. It was one date and then neither of you cared enough to get together again 😐

Fuck me, this is a terrifying thread 😬

Did the date go well? You said you hadn’t bothered asking for another, and he didn’t either, so it reads like it wasn’t a great date?