To think he's said this in case he doesn't want to eat with me?

[Ceeeeee]

I made a profile on an app and some guy's asked me out for a bite to eat. I said yes, and we've agreed to meet this weekend.
Now he's said shall we have a short walk first before the food to 'see how we feel'?

That's obviously code for, I'll see if I fancy you and if not I don't have to eat with you. It wasn't a fancy sit down meal, just a quick bite to eat like. Should I still go ahead? I don't know why, this has put me off slightly.
It was only some waffle place, I wouldn't go for a formal meal for a first date either. Should I still go?

Basically if your not worth sleeping with he doesn’t want to buy a waffle, fuck that! He can already make a reasonable assessment from your profile, but he wants to make absolutely sure you’re fuckable, nice.

I would love a walking date. Especially with a coffee and in a busy city. I hate dinner dates where you just sit and make conversation, it’s so awkward. If you walk your surroundings can be topics of conversation.

Yes but you're still not supposed to be so sexually and socially clueless about it!

Make a date, commit to it, accept that it might not go anywhere but at least give the impression that you're looking forward to it and you're all in for the duration to get to know this person a bit. A man who faffs and wibbles and hedges bets clearly because he wants to see if you're fuckable before he even commits to a walk and a snack stop (which would take, what, an hour in total?) is a complete turn off. It's not just inept and ungentlemanly, it's really insulting that he thinks his motive isn't plain as day.

This! I couldn't deal with this level of faff and headfuckery just for an initial meet.

This is how I see it too.

‘We will see how we feel’ is exactly what I’d say to fob off plans I don’t really have interest in or don’t want to commit to.

There's just zero fun or excitement in heading on a date if the other person can’t even commit to a cafe visit, it’s like OP is just showing up to be checked out and accepted/rejected. Walking around a town centre to see how we feel.. I’d feel like a 13 year old loitering in the local square 🤢

This thread has made me laugh so much.

Fuck me he sounds dull as dishwater.
I think you are going to turn up and there will be Kevin the teenager standing there in his dirty trainers and baseball cap back to front, with his cash card loads up with £15 by his mum!

ok let's be truthful - who thinks he is going to cancel
a. tonight
b. tomorrow morning

He's said he's already planning a holiday and saving up for it for his 40th. Which is in 7 years. Weird or normal?

I think what would insult/upset me is that at this point he's seen your profile, you've exchanged some messages, yet he's still dubious about potentially spending 20/30 minutes with you. So much so he needs a get out clause. For me that just wouldn't be worth the effort of getting ready and giving up part of my day for. Just a complete lack of enthusiasm.

This.

There was a recent thread, the OP regularly got invited out for food via OLD, but there was a pattern of men turning up for the date, and then suddenly deciding to go for a walk instead. It turned out the OP was using quite old pictures on her profile, and posters concluded she wasn’t quite ‘as advertised.’ This makes me wonder if the OP’s date has experienced a few ‘misrepresentations’? This would explain his stance but I still think he has poor manners.

Well, I don't think that's bad, albeit not my style (I'm not nearly organised enough!).

If it's an expensive trip and he's not on an enormo-salary then saving gradually over a few years seems a sensible and low impact way to afford it.

I get you. Feels a bit odd to be looking forward to your 40th at only 33 when it's a decade when so much can change (partner, kids, career, location) but financially it stacks up.

He's not much of a risk taker though, is he?!

Wow that must be some holiday !!!

Cruise ?

QE2 to / from New York

what ?

As @Frogandfish says, it does seem a little early, a lot can change between now and then.

On the other hand what it could also mean (and where I'm heading with this given his behaviour so far) that he's planning a solo holiday and he has no intention of being in a relationship when he's 40.

You’re right, it might be a GoHenry card!

Not an issue in and of itself but if he's using it as an excuse not to spend £6 on a date...

He's still keen to get over that he might not be interested...'we can see how we feel' but then commits to going for a waffle ...'let's do that...' presumably after the scoping-out drink.

He's waffly hard work! I don't think I could be arsed.

So is it today OP?? Please do keep us posted if you go ahead

or is it tomorrow - as you did say ' weekend '

I assumed it would be today, but I shouldn't have.

Sorry for the late reply I'm going on this date now so I'll update after 🤣

That's a swerve sadly. 6'0 on his profile, I'm 5'7 and he was 2 inches taller than me at best.
Banged on about himself, the second we'd finished eating the waffles he said 'shall we leave?'
Tried to put a piece of his waffle on my plate without me even asking (nice he wanted to share it but I didn't want some essential stranger's food just plonked on my plate)
Put his hand on my waist whilst we were crossing the road.
Just didn't fancy him at all. It's not his fault, just didn't. Ahh well.

I'm surprised you even went tbh

Maybe the lad just really doesn't like waffles. He's done everything he can to avoid them 🤣
I'm also surprised that you went, sounded like so much hard work for a first date

I'm surprised I went too 😂 I didn't like that he put his hand on my waist when crossing the road, is that being too picky? I'm perfectly capable of guiding myself across and I didn't want the touching.

No, not picky at all. Hope you have better luck with the next one 😊

Thank you :)