A man called me an 'ugly fat c***' and it has really impacted me

[Implodedsuddenly]

At the weekend, I pulled into a free parking space near our local beach. Suddenly this 55-60 year old man started banging on my car window saying his wife was going to park there and was just turning round (she was nowhere to be seen).
I ignored him and locked my doors as I was genuinely frightened of him - he was a huge muscly guy, in a vest top, and didn't look like a nice character.

I carried on ignoring him and he suddenly started shouting that I am an 'ugly fat cunt' and 'no man would ever go near you looking like that'. Lots of people saw and heard him, but no one stopped him as I guess they were worrked by him too. As he walked away, his wife parked a few spaces up and he spat on my car. His wife saw but didn't say a word.

I am a very happily married 40 year old woman with 4 children and a good career, but his words have honestly shaken me up and hurt me so deeply. I already have a low self esteem. I was utterly humiliated to have those things said to me. I clearly am fat and gruesome for someone to use it against me.

My husband says the only humiliated person is him and he's utterly disgraceful speaking to a woman like that.

But it's really cut me deep and left me feeling SO terrible about myself.

AIBU to be so upset?

I would have simply said Snap takes one to know one.Or I'm so fucking glad I don't share a bed with you, your disgusting. 🤮

This!!

He's the cunt, op. Forget about him.

I clearly am fat and gruesome for someone to use it against me.
Nonsense. He could say that to anyone. It doesn’t have to be true.

My husband says the only humiliated person is him and he's utterly disgraceful speaking to a woman like that.
Listen to your husband. That man was angry because you parked where he wanted to park. That’s it. That’s the long and short of it.

And because he’s an ignorant arsehole he decided to yell and abuse you. I pity his wife. God knows what she had to put up with.

One thing that really gets my goat though it how often these arseholes go unchallenged. I had a man once start yelling at me on the tube, borderline threatening like what happened to you, and everyone just sat there dumbly.

What a disgusting excuse of a human being and it’s also disgusting that no one said anything to him. I imagine that his wife is too cowed to stand up to him.

It was a horrible experience, OP, but you know that that you shouldn’t pay any attention to a twat like him. Shake it off and be glad that you have a lovely DH instead of someone like that 💐

His tirade at me went on for quite a while. Longer than was necessary and I sat back and was shocked. Once he seemed to have exhausted himself I said “you marrying a doctor is not an accomplishment on your part. Your fiancé is the one that went out and got a medical degree - not you and I hope that she realises what an abusive man you are - preferably before she marries you”.

He carried on that his fiancé loves him and I told him it would only be a matter of time before she realised what he was and she would leave

Good for you 🙌🏻

BS - the fact is you dont know and I heard people say that to men and that is a fact

Therefore, please remain calm as we are all supporting the OP about this inbred waste of space that was supported by its wife/OH/partenr as she stood by and said nothing did nothing thus enabling the inbred to carry on with is disgusting behaviour

Enjoy your evening, babe - must dash.

This is so true, great advice @Zombella

Honestly you lost be at the lunatic who starting shouting at a woman over a parking space . Anything he said after that I would simply ignore. He is clearly and utterly a moron and not worth one second of your time.

Lol

I agree with all the posts to remember people like this have nothing better in their vocabulary to offer and what he said is the extent of his abilities.

It’s understandable how you would be shaken up. I think the part that stuck out is the spitting on the car. How utterly repulsive. Imagine being the wife stuck with such a fiend. Ugh.

You are not the vile things he said.

This. I'm so sorry op

Look on the plus side OP. You endured this charming man for about 40 seconds.

His wife is with him for life.

Think how shit some women have it.

Just a horrible bully - another man who picks on women. I doubt he’d have said anything to a similar age man. Fact.

He’s the cunt.
I’d be upset too, but really he is just an abusive bastard. Feel sorry for his wife.

He's another one of these arsehole bullies

www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/crime/road-rage-driver-dorset-viral-court-b2540782.html

Next time, film him and get him locked up. It's not you. It's him..

I imagine you're still in shock tbh. I know I would be if someone spoke to me like that.

Try to put him out of your mind and focus on all the lovely people who love you.

I’m so sorry you experienced this, what a vile, nasty piece of work he is.Id be mortified if my OH spoke to anyone like this. Shame on him.Dont let this prick knock your confidence.

It’s ok to be upset, he was horrible. However the one who should be humiliated is himself. His poor wife, if he says that to you, a stranger in public, you can just imagine what he calls his wife behind closed doors!

I truly cannot thank everyone enough for responding. I'm so sorry that so many of us have experienced this.

I did get a sneaky photo of him when he was walking away, but not much I can do with it.

You're all helping me so much - a true example of the sisterhood!

Thank you

You have the best username op. I've just had a email from Mumsnet that said "The op imploded suddenly" 😂 I thought to myself 'Ooh, what's kicking off on mumsnet!'

Remember being in the car with a friends father extremely aristocratic former top military. Some idiot was ranting raving and screaming at him. He just ignored him with a slight “I am sooo much better than you” smirk and made polite conversation with us - utterly unrattled. I channel him when it happens!

An angry little man did it to me recently as I couldn’t fit in a space in a small car park. I gave up in the end and let him have the space. He couldn’t fit in it either!. He whizzed off in a storm of swearing and wheel spins oh how I laughed!

Upload the photo to social media shame the silly little boy.
Or just put it on her and wait for the sun journalists to come across it.

Hey OP I am slim and considered quite attractive. I’ve been called that before. TRUST ME he had decided to call you that before he noticed whatever you look like. It is the standard middle-aged mantrum insult.

'Ugly fat cunt' is something he would have shouted at anyone who was even slightly overweight so it really has no bearing on your attractiveness or size.

Insults said in temper are often stock phrases.

Have you ever said or thought 'stupid idiot' when annoyed by someone who isn't actually stupid but in the moment that's what you have you got or said?!

No one will think less of you but will have seen the man and unanimously thought - 'Wanker'!

Some men in a car shouted out ”slag” to my mother - a 70 something professional lady who has been happily married for the last 50 years. It’s no reflection on you it’s the generic misogynistic insult - not to minimise how awful and upsetting it is.

And I bet Kate Middleton will have had a similar incident.

Fuck him, the thick, rude, failed wanker of a woman abusing little cunt.