To feel repulsed by my husband and hate my life right now?

[cookiedoughh]

I’m typing this as I’m lying in my 8 year old daughters room. I’m miserable. I got everything ready for work and the kids stuff for morning and just wanted to drop into bed but yet another night where I feel sick as I walked into mine and husbands bedroom and the stink of faeces just hits me! He’s gone to the toilet in the Ensuite and not sprayed and I know there will be disgusting marks left in toilet which he won’t clean. I feel so sick I couldn’t even take my contacts out. I’m too tired to find the air freshener which one of the kids has moved. If it’s not the disgusting smell he leaves he snores and a few times when I’ve told him I’ve got an important day at work and please not to wake me up I’m woken to him banging around the room looking for things and also I feel embarrassed writing this but he’s been wanking himself whilst I’ve tried to sleep. That’s why I always let him go up first and then I go to bed around 10:45/11:00. I’m knackered, I just want to sleep and have a good night sleep. I feel
so sleep deprived. Even tonight in my DD’s room I won’t have a good night sleep as she will be tossing n turning in her sleep and bed is so tiny I will wake up to an arm or leg hitting me (obviously she’s not doing on purpose). I’m sorry to write this on here but I’m so fed up I’m just really fed up of my life. I just need some sleep. I often nap after coming from work (try to) but kids wake me up, I put tv in for them but can’t even manage 10 mins nap.

sorry for any typos and sorry for TMI.

See, I don't get this attitude. Should she just stick with someone she's utterly repelled by and who shows no respect or concern for her whatsoever, because they have a child together? Sure, work things out if you can. If they've spoken and he's agreed to stop wanking over her while she sleeps (!) and stinking out the bog, and is going to treat her more respectfully, then sure, give it another go. But it does seem like if it was that straightforward, she'd have done it already...

Let him????

Could this thread get any worse?

This thread is a complete and utter disaster in women blaming women for men's inadequacies. I'm not sure I've ever seen anything like it. No, the op does not need to scrub the toilet, nor tell her husband why leaning his shit stain for her to clean and wanking in front of her isn't acceptable.

There is a thread going at the moment about why are men so shit with many theories put forward. If some of the women here who seem to think this man is perfectly fine, have sons, and are teaching them yes it's fine to leave your shit son, your wife will sort it, then that would explain a lot.

@bogoffeternal apt.

Do you poo at bedtime within feet of the marital bed?

Leave your skid marks in there for your DH to scrub out?

Wank nightly next to your DH while he's breathing in the smell of your faeces, to the point where he can't sleep so has to climb in bed with your eight year old child in the hope that he will get more shut eye?

If not, why not?

Have you ever read anything more deeply than just decoding the words on the page?

It's clear that the level of disrespect (contempt) the OP's husband has for her needs more than a 'talking to'

I haven't read the whole thread but if you do not have a window in your bathroom, try a match (I use wooden ones), light it and let it burn for a few seconds. Have used this for over 50 years. I like it better than the sprays, which just cover the smell and candles, which need to be watched.

I’m laughing 🤣🤣🤣

Read the OP's posts. It's way past that

What's with this 'Let him' nonsense?

The 1950s are thataway <<<<<<<<<<

And please tell me you're not the parent of sons

Boys will be boys...

Don't we want boys to grow up to be decent men?

@Nanny0gg James the Red Engine has hopefully puffed off into the distance with his irrelevant cargo of misogynistic claptrap behind him.

Oh he’s disgusting. Dh has some habits I find a bit gross (farting in front of me and not washing his hands properly) etc but he’d never take a dump in the en-suite if I was around and the wanking next to you is just 😱.

He sounds utterly contemptuous of you - he literally doesn’t give a shit what you think. Ltb.

Honestly. He's lying in bed next to his wife whom he fancies. Nature will happen and boys will be boys. When did you last let him make love to you? Years ago? Love making is better than any sleeping tablet.

Ask him very nicely not to dump in the en suite, and ask him to use the bog brush. And please do it without having a row.

But divorce, for this???? He doesn't choose to snore.

Are you for real? Because if you are I’m very embarrassed for you.

🤬😂🤢

Men can be gross and inconsiderate. Who knew right?

There's a middle ground between silently suffering and getting a divorce.

You're staying with your farter who doesn't wash his hands, but happy to tell others to split up over inconsiderate shitting and wanking?

Tell me you're a man without telling me you're a man.

Let him "make love" to her? Barf.

Just sleep in the living room, or make him sleep in there. Unless you have another spare bedroom, in which case just sleep in there.

I snore and I use a bloody CPAP machine so I don't wake the entire house up or have a heart attack or crash the car from lack of sleep.
If you snore you can actually lose your driving licence. I was 1 point away from losing mine when I did the test.

Gross.

I have a separate bedroom to my partner and a separate bathroom.

We both require separate closets and need our own space.

I don’t think he poops in his ensuite because that’s where he brushes his teeth.

Your husband is utterly vile and has no respect for you. You need to be able to get some sleep.

So can women, but these are the ones we don't stay in relationship with because we respect ourselves more.

I'm sorry for your loss.

But was your wife never downstairs? What about guests? Because I think it's disgusting to 'have a clear out' in a small downstairs room where kids are going to be in and out and the living room and kitchen are and guests are going to be using it. I'd much rather the main bathroom be used where you can close the door and it not be used for some time.

I guess we all find different things disgusting!

Does he know how repulsive and repugnant he is to you? DH would be horrified and really hurt if he found out his behaviour and habits had led to me feeling like that about him. Perhaps you should tell him(n those words, quietly that you are moving into a spare room because he disgusts you so much and you can no longer bear to be near him. Might make him think.

My stp sister had a partner like that. When he would stay over, he would;

1. wank in the morning, in the same room people where sleeping.
2. Shit in the toilet leaving poo stains and stinking up the whole bottom floor of the house
3. let out sudden, large burps, then blow the burb smell out the side of his mouth like it was tobacco smoke or something
4. Fart, loudly, laugh whilst the stink cloud floated around, gassing everyone and making us gag.
5. Take the largest of food portions for himself before anyone else had a chance
6. PIck his teeth at the table
7. JOke about sex/talk about sex/ all the time.

The list could go on, but I feel sick enough as it is.

Some folk have to share a very small space. Bu they still manage basic respect.

If you don't have another bedroom, sleep on the couch for a few nights. May not be the best solution but at least you'll get some rest. If you have another bathroom, use it and don't clean up after him. I would hand him the cleaner and a cloth and tell him to do it himself.