Baked 23 cookies, dh ate 8 of them

[27Bumblebees]

I baked some cookies after dinner, like I do most weekends so the kids had some slightly less unhealthy snacks to go in their lunch boxes and to just have in the house. At the end of the night I went to put them in a container from the cooling rack and only 14 remained. I had one, so dh took 8 of them in the two hours since I cooked them! What kind of shitty self control is that.

I feel more pissed off that I took a little bit of time to do something nice (mainly for the kids, we're adults, we don't need bloody biscuits), and he's just gone for it with no respect for anyone else. Only apologised when I called him out for it. Ugh.

To clarify, I’m not defending every single comment as I haven’t read them all, but I’m more defending my words when they were specifically quoted in a hostile and rude way.

As to the actual thread topic - at
this point I’m really not bothered about whether OP or her husband baked more cookies or whatever.

I wouldn’t even have posted again after I’d left my initial comments had I not seen my words quoted in that manner.

As OP said themselves it’s not really a big deal . I’d agree with that.

My posts to them were long mainly because their posts were long so I was responding to their various points. Most of my other posts were relatively short.

Also long doesn’t = taking it too seriously.

I don’t know if you think this is some kind of “gotcha” but it’s not my points are still valid regardless of the length of my posts. @pootlin

And as I’ve said I wouldn’t even have returned to the thread had they not quoted me in that manner. My initial comments were made thinking it wasn’t a serious thread and I didn’t think any more on it.

Later it became a more frothy thread and I was quoted so obviously I was going to respond in kind to the relevant posters lol it’s pretty simple

Yikes @Crepester That’s a lot of words just to say you don’t like people disagreeing with you!

I can see that the only reason you’re on this thread is because I had the audacity to quote your original comment as part of my critique of the general shitty tone of the responses. Look, if you post on a public forum, people can really do what they want with your words. Sorry. I could just as easily have quoted any of the other dozens of unpleasant responses OP received.

You’re outraged because I’ve pointed out that you, along with many others, have been unkind. I’m not on a ‘crusade’ but I do think it’s shitty to join in a mean-spirited response to an OP who had a legitimate gripe. You know this. That’s why you’re mad.

You sound really fun to live with. It's no big deal to make another batch. Do you ration everything he has?

See @Crepester - this is the sort of clown you’ve aligned yourself with by breezily suggesting OP should just whip up batch after batch of cookies for a lazy husband’s casual greed.

I’m assuming this one is an MRA and that you’re not. But it’s not a good look.

Please can i have your life!?

I want to bake cookies and then be so annoyed that i post on a public forum that they were clearly so nice that they were eaten.

Bake more of them!

@BernardBlacksBreakfastWine
Look, you made an hugely angry OTT post about those who think she’s BU and went out of your way to specifically quote my words saying it was easy to bake more and you described them as “dickish comments”.

Quote what you want but know people will have their say when it concerns their words. So now when I defend my words, along with the facts I’ve outlined in my previous post (that you’ve deftly ignored) about the fact Op herself said it wasn’t a big deal,
it’s a silly thread, they’re so easy to bake etc- you say I’m the one who has a problem with people sticking up for themselves?

Again, you engaged me by quoting my words, you’re the one taking issue with me sticking up for myself against posters who quote me into posts like that.

I wasn’t being unkind, cruel, or mean-spirited and I can imagine most posters weren’t either because according to you, mine was the worst comment and it basically said it was easy to bake a new batch.

The mean-spiritedness however was clearly evident in your post the other night. You didn’t have the moral high ground to begin with, so I can’t even say you lost it. Honestly, find a better moral crusade. This isn’t it.

Look, you made an hugely angry OTT post

Can you quote or give an example of which bit of Bernard's posts was hugely angry or OTT? Because I can't see anything like that.

No I’m not going to go back and re-read and select parts to quote for you, especially as we are getting further from the actual main points I challenged that are still valid, but I will very briefly say IMO:

the overall tone was disproportionately angry given what this thread topic is about, especially them calling this thread infuriating and calling my fairly malign words the most dickish @drusth

I’ll leave it at that.

That just proves her posts were in no way 'hugely angry OTT'.

Don't make accusations you can't prove. Your posts have become gradually more and more unhinged.

Master gaslighting lol they were massively rude and angry and I just defended myself now I’m the unhinged one?

I literally gave examples - which I didn’t even have to - but just said I wasn’t going to go back and select bits to quote for you. Why on earth should I?

You must be unhinged yourself because that’s a massive leap. Stop making rude comments about people and they won’t engage in arguments with you. But you certainly won’t discourage me from speaking up by claiming I’m “unhinged” for defending my words.

edit to add: Again to me this strikes me as a poor attempt to detract from my very valid points about the irony of berating people when OP herself saying it wasn’t a big deal so I won’t engage further. Absolute nonsense.

I've just done a quick search of the thread and @BernardBlacksBreakfastWine never used the word 'infuriating' , so your example was basically a lie.

Is that not 'major gaslighting'?

@Crepester
I wasn’t being unkind, I wasn’t being cruel, I wasn’t being mean-spirited and from want I can see most posters weren’t

It definitely is mean-spirited to breezily suggest that someone’s legitimate complaint about how her husband treats the family is just nothing. That’s what you did. In fact, the light-hearted tone in which you did it, happily laughing at the fact cookies are sooooo easy to make was dickish. I stand by that.

You don’t have to be using strong words in order to be mean-spirited.

Yes, my words were stronger. But they were justified. I think my tone was exasperation rather than anger, but you clearly disagree. I do find it exasperating when poster after poster is so wide of the mark and just filled the unpleasant tone set early on.

I don’t know how else to explain it to you. It’s unpleasant to belittle someone’s genuine complaint and suggest it’s basically nothing. That’s what you did. the fact that many others did too doesn’t negate that. I wish to god I’d quoted someone else!

@drusth I wasn’t going to reply tbh but I see now genuinely misread “irritating” for infuriating so no that wasn’t gaslighting it was an error which I told my hands up to .

But my point still stands about the overall tone was overly angry and serious considering the subject matter, and more importantly how nitpicking over this is a poorly veiled deflection from my main point about how Op themselves said it wasn’t a big deal and it was a silly thread. So why are posters getting themselves twisted in knots shouting at others for also saying it’s not that serious or over me saying it was easy to make a new batch ?

There is no good reason and not one of you have been able to answer this.

@BernardBlacksBreakfastWine

. I wish to god I’d quoted someone else!

The only part of your post I agree with and that’s the closest we’ll get to agreement I think!

I would respond to the rest but I’ve already more or less said what I’d say again and I think my points are still valid and I do believe your initial post was very unpleasant.

Not much else to say!

So much for what OP called a silly thread eh lol 👀

Also wanted to ask for the recipe.

How is using the word 'irritating' a sign that someone is 'hugely angry OTT'? Funny how you misread a benign word for one that fits your 'hugely angry' narrative.

Yes, OP was asked if it was a big deal and she said no, but she's still annoyed at his greediness and that he won't replace them. And she's allowed to be, without everyone piling on her and telling her to bake more, that she's controlling what he eats etc.

So this isn't the 'gotcha' you think it is.

OP already shared it upthread.

Come on , this isn’t hard@drusth I clearly admitted that I misread infuriating when it actually said irritating. I still felt the overall tone was disproportionately angry but as I’ve said to that poster I’ve nothing more to say them I’m not going to be going back and forth critically dissecting their posts with you.

But regarding the actual topic posted by OP - it’s AIBU and even without OP saying it wasn’t a big deal and it was a silly thread - people are rightly going to feel free to contribute their opinions as to if it’s U or not. It’s really not a pile on or anything out of the ordinary.

And I also said her husband can bake more which is something she considered herself apparently, but really - saying someone can bake more themselves even isn’t really harsh or unkind. OP is allowed to express her opinions it’s greedy and annoying, and we are allowed to express our opinion that it’s a minor issue and it wouldn’t bother us. That’s how AIBU works.

And if the OP is saying it’s a silly thread and people should chill their beans etc you can’t have a go at other posters saying similar.

Thanks.

Great post.

We are talking about cookies here people!!! It really isnt that deep.

• Bake more cookies as they apparently are delicious.
• Tell your greedy husband not to eat them

Can we take a moment and think about the posters telling me to lighten up, at least he likes my baking? As if this is a marker of happiness? As if I live to bake for the man I married, eagerly awaiting his feedback on my latest batch...

Anyway thanks for sticking up for me and my time @BernardBlacksBreakfastWine and while yes @Crepester I did say it's not a big deal, breezily dismissing my irritation as if baking endlessly for my dh is the answer wasn't exactly helpful- I'm a working mum of 3, I don't have that kind of time!

Better get back to those bigger problems, because your take on this little one is shit. ‘Make some sodding cake’?

@Bellaboo01

It really isnt that deep.

At the risk of sounding angry…. Aargggghh!! That is the exact sort of teenagery nonsense that got me so incensed on this thread! Who are you to say it’s not important? That’s exactly what feckless teenagers say when they can’t be bothered to engage with other people’s entirely rational and legitimate feelings.

If you accidentally but carelessly bump into someone, causing no real harm but a momentary affront to that person’s day, you don’t stare at them blankly and say ‘It’s not that deep’ if they seem to require a brief apology, do you? Or perhaps you do 🤷‍♀️